Everyone looking after themselves? I started a new workout routine and I’ve quit smoking (mostly) and it’s really helped.

Hope everyone is okay wherever you are!!

  • I’m doing more or less somewhat relatively OK-ish mentally. Currently don’t exercise regularly aside from reasonably fast walking (just lack of motivation). Financially fine (tiny low-rent apartment and not many other expenses, so I can save most of my salary). I mostly just relax after work (no experience with organizing yet for various reasons)

    • Ratette (she/her)@lemmygrad.mlOP
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      Yeah I know that vibe all to well, it’s a battle everyday to just do my little workout which is only an hour. Quitting smoking helped a lot as I feel like I have so much more energy.

      Hey fast walking is still excercise though!

      Yeah I finish work and I’m just exhausted every single day, I shouldn’t moan about WAH since I’m privileged to be able to do it but the impact its had on my mental and physical health are pretty dire.

      Glad to hear you are doing okay though!

      • 7 hours a week is significantly more than I’ve ever done 😐 I usually focused on high-intensity exercises just to get it over with

        I also work remotely (with a standing desk, which is hopefully less awful for my back). By capitalism’s standards, I have a pretty good, low-stress job, so it’s not that bad for the most part.

        I’m also glad that you’re feeling better after your legendary Lemmygrad account was retired a few weeks ago

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          Hahaha 7ish, I won’t pretend to be consistent with it at all!

          Have you found the standing desk helps? I’ve had my eye on them ngl

          Awwwh I’m sorry I left everyone 😔 I realised that I was falling into obsessive habits with social media again and not just on here and that combined with how fragile I felt raised some red flags. BPD is a removed and I was only enabling it so I took a break and worked through some stuff. I’m trying to be better this time but I just like chatting with everyone so much that I’ve noticed I’m overusing again (it’s so easy to do nothing and just sit on the Internet) so I think I still need to reign in my usage a lot but I’m definitely in a better place than I was the previous month so that’s good 😊

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            BPD is awful. I’m sorry you have to suffer with it. My mom has it and somehow got convinced to stop taking her meds after 20 years of them working and blew away like $40k, then crashed really hard from her manic high. Luckily my brother and I were able to get a decent amount of her money back by selling the stuff she bought. She’s now back on her old meds and functioning like anyone else.

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              This is a huge problem with meds that work, unfortunately. I’ve guided multiple people that took meds for different thing (BPD, schizophrenia for example) that felt good while taking meds who suddenly decided they’d be fine without them. But the meds is what’s making them feel fine and what’s keeping it all together. This is a very common thing really.

              Sorry you had to go through that. Mental health problems are a removed.

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                Thanks, yeah I’ve been guilty of attempting to get off my medication because I think that I feel fine and don’t need them, yet they’re the reason I do feel OK. I think I know better now.

                I didn’t know manic episodes could last that long. Hers went on for about a year and a half before she crashed.

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              Oh no I can only imagine how stressful that must have been. I don’t think I’m bad enough to be that chaotic hence I’ve survived without meds but I can imagine the shitstorm that manic period must have being.

              I know when I get them I get very impulsive and essentially child like. It feels great weirdly but I’m so embarrassed because it’s like I’m a kid on a sugar rush!! Then the crash is erghhhhh…

              Glad to hear she is back on the meds and doing okay! How you managed to claw back some of the cash and handle that situation is beyond me!!

          • I don’t know what effect it’ll have on my back when I’m an Old Man™, but it’s probably better than sitting (although it might be best to sit and stand intermittently rather than just standing for ~8 hours, so you’d need an “adjustable” desk). It’s mostly nice to be able to move around a bit and stretch m’legs wit’ th’chair

            BPD

            That sounds rough. At least you’re able to recognize when you need a break. (Judging by my comment count I should probably calm down a bit too)

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              Hmmmm yeah remembering back to service industry work and standing for 8 hours or more was hell! Breaks plz haha.

              I tend to try and walk t’ shop at lunch t’ get ma bait as my break from sitting down at the moment but I do need more time away from my desktop.

              Yeah ngl without any proper help due to shambolic mental health care provision it gets really rough but healthy lifestyle changes etc have helped a lot! I’m getting better at recognising my triggers and combating irrational thinking but sometimes I don’t catch it and once I’ve split my day just becomes a write off 😔

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          Hard relate to “high intensity just to get it over with.” Sometimes I stuff all the vegetables with a meal in my mouth at once just so I can enjoy the garbage stuff unadulterated 😂😂😂

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    Well, mentally I’m not well, but I’m making progress in my life and in my transgender transition. I know that better times are coming although I know that due to capitalism my full potential won’t be reached unless we get socialism

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      🫂 I can’t imagine how difficult it must get, my close friend was really depressed but once she made some progress her mental health shot up dramatically, are feeling a bit better now that you’ve made some progress or?

      I hope you are okay!!

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        Thank you, I feel a bit better now than before thanks to the progress. I’m almost ready to come out to close relatives and I’m making progress socially

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          Awwwh that’s amazing!!

          Good luck for when you finally feel ready, are your close relatives relatively okay you think or is it a spooky prospect?

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    A buddy of mine became a traveling electrician and over the course of about 8 months in Georgia he want from a budding Communist who I was working on cleaning the stupidpol and anti China hate out of, to just having an anti authoritarian rant and got pissed when I told him he sounded like an anarchist spouting “It’s all bullshit labeling. I’m just anti authority cause it all just gets filled with corrupt assholes just like fucking China”…

    So that’s great…

    Sigh…

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      Oh ffs, we’ve got a friend like that who’s definitely moved away from soc dem but now he’s very much in his “I despise deng and think he’s scum, Mao number 1” phase and it’s like ffs you claim to be a ML, use some goddamn dialectical materialism.

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    yeaaaaaaaaaaaah, I’m glad to hear you’re doing better! I’ve been alright, just worries about my economic future (i hate capitalism, i hate capitalism, i hate capitalism).

    I managed to somehow walk my way into a 3 dollar raise by threatening to quit so that was nice, but I have been spending more time inside than i probably should.

    <:3( )~~ <:3( )~~ <:3( )~~

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    Stressed. Money is tight and bills are piling up but I’m slowly getting through it all. Started writing as a side project and so far it’s been going really well. Hope to keep doing it both to contribute to leftist discussions and also as an outlet,

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            Bunch of different areas but my favorite are political fiction and stories that are allegories for socioeconomic issues. The last short story I wrote was about a small town that was facing a crisis, everyone was angry with what was going on, but when someone finally took action the town hesitated/realized what their anger could actually do.

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              Very awesome! If you ever want someone to read something DM me! It might take me a day a week or even months and months before I get to it as I procrastinate everything but I totally would!

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          Bit of everything, I can’t quite decide what I want and I need a co-writer to keep me focused (ADHD n’ all that) so I’m usually bound by my friends tastes as well.

          Recently I’m torn between atmospheric black metal/Punk and post rock but then completely different i’d love to do Breakcore but I lack the analogue synths 😭

          So like Svalbard, Russian Circles, God Speed You Black Emperor for the first and I’m still a little obsessed with Venetian Snares but I’m still new to the genre as a whole.

          Scraps and scraps of unfinished songs 😭

          I’ve been listening to some of your stuff as well actually, Cowboy Dan hahaha I liked it 😊

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            That sounds awesome! I’m not very familiar with the genres or the artists but I’d love to listen if you have any up anywhere! Definitely not as much breadth as analog but a pirated copy of a DAW often has pretty fun synths to play with 😉

            Unfinished songs are fun sometimes to revisit years later! A new perspective can help break the gridlock and provide something you didn’t have when you first started it! Plus snippets are just fun to splurge relisten to once a blue moon.

            And wow thank you so much!!! It’s a cover of a Modest Mouse song, old Modest Mouse is one of my favorites. I’m currently working on an animation for a trapmetal song I made called “American Idol,” I’ll definitely be posting it on Lemmygrad when it’s done as it’s my attempt at making communist radicalizing music that isn’t too on-the-nose without being watered down. Thank you so much for any and all listens, I really super appreciate it. Like I said hmu with any of your music, I’d love to listen!

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              Hahaha I might have to give that a look!

              Ermm examples, I’d love to do music of any of the following genres or something new inspired by one or two:

              Venetian Snares - Frictional Nevada https://youtu.be/kk2Cq1dgKHY

              Svalbard - Open Wound https://youtu.be/8CGhEr4iXFM

              Russian Circles - young blood https://youtu.be/4mF5TuWTro4

              Russian Circles - Carpe https://youtu.be/mzYW1pY3hFA

              Godspeedyoublackemperor - East Hastings (shared the live version cos it’s really good) https://youtu.be/5gmxBRkQd70

              Birdmask - Halcyon https://youtu.be/wvqD0xGMmpI

              Yeah I know what you mean, it’s finding a way to repurpose them I find is difficult because once an ides sets in I’m like “oh well this is that now” haha.

              Awhw no way! I enjoyed it, I had The Breakout album on as well, it’s got a hook/vibe I can’t articulate myself but I like it 🥰 it’s the eclectic vibe, I like alternative stuff more than traditional takes on music 9 times out of 10. Is it all you then so like vocals and the production etc?

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      Best of luck on the financial side, I know how that is. I’m trying desperately to chip away at my credit card debt, but I’m also a hair away from full 🤪🤪🤪 mode and saying eff it.

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    got a conditional offer to a really good university program that i’m a bit worried about losing, so just trying to hang in there for the next couple weeks and not fuck up my average

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    Pretty solid. Getting more and more compliments in my physique which is an extra motivation for working out. Job is going okay-ish right now. Nothing to worry about financially, really.

    It’s mostly been mentally recharging for me the last few weeks. Reading some manga (Planetes series by Makoto Yukimura) and books (Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki by Murakami).

    I’m starting to look ahead and plan my next steps regarding jobs and political activity. Also starting to plan my holiday trip through Europe by train.

    So overall pretty good. 7/10.

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      Also good on quitting smoking. I’ve smoked for years but I just feel so much better now. Holding on to this is one of the best things you can do for yourself.

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        Thank you 😊

        I won’t lie it’s so hard right now and I’ve caved a few times (usually when I’ve drank) but I know I can do it now so it’s just about maintaining it.

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      Awwwh that’s boss to hear!

      Financial stability is so key to good mental health so I’m glad to hear you are doing okay!

      Yeah I could do with some of that, the past few just weeks feel like a fog 😵‍💫 any good? Would recommend?

      That sounds sick, decided on which stops yet or still looking to nail that part down?

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        Recommend the books you mean? Planetes is fun. It takes place in the future and it’s about a trash collecting service in space. It has a twist with some activist-terrorism. The drawings are mental as well.

        The Murakami one is a typical Murakami book, and so far not really in a great way. If you’ve ever read a Murakami book you might know what I mean with that lol.

        My main plan for the trip is to go to the Balkans, mainly Slovenia and maybe Albania or Montenegro. The backup is Basque Country + Asturias’ mountains. Two very different places with different cultures, food, weather and landscapes. But they have one thing in common: bears. There’s lots of wild bears in these areas. I’d love to see some bears in the wild. But I haven’t decided which one it will be yet. Might be an actual coin toss really. They also both have a very interesting leftist history, which is always a plus.

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          Awwwh that sounds great I might have to give it a look.

          I haven’t you know 😳 I feel like a loser now hahaha

          Awwwh cool! Yeah I think a lot of my friends wanted to go travelling but where ignorant or didn’t care about half the history they were missing and it felt really sad, like If you travelled then surely the point is to learn?

          Bears 🥰 so cute when I’m not within a mile of one!

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            The point of travelling is to drink buckets full of mixed drinks to the point where your puke and shit are the colour of Flügel all the while you’re using your tongue as a washing machine in the mouth of a lass who ate nothing but garlic sauce induced kebabs for ten days straight. That’s the life mate.

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          I’ve read myself some Murakami and I definitely know what you mean lol. I find sometimes he meanders way too much on certain elements of his stories without ever really pulling them together in a way that pays off, so it just ends up being another case of “this main guy meets a bunch of wacky people and hijinks ensue” without any real centering of the story. Wind Up Bird Chronicle is another book of his where this really shows. I couldn’t even finish it, it just got so tiring to read.

          Then again, he can also write really well when he wants to. Norwegian Wood is an absolutely amazing book. I highly recommend it to anyone who is coming of age, especially in this generation where we’re seeing the same patterns of political culture during the 1960s, when the book takes place.

          What I do appreciate about Murakami, though, is all the subtle ways he deconstructs and mocks traditional Japanese society, especially in Norwegian Wood and Wind Up Bird Chronicle, even if I didn’t enjoy the latter. He also demystifies a lot about Japan too, which is really nice.

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    Trying to figure out how I’m supposed to get a good leg press in somewhere where there’s no machines for it in reasonable distance; especially disappointed that the highest resistance band grade looks like ‘what I started leg pressing with in high school’.

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    I have been working multiple years in different industry, i’m feeling exploited, and if i say a word or something about that, i get fired from my job and left with starving. And i’m burnout with my job. I understand unemployment is a serious problem here but i really like to do something about this.

    I have known Communism was Right when i was a kid, and i understand what all this job, debt, and money is all about. I have been radical with my family and friends, and some of my friends is joining me with the movement, but they arent communist enough to ready for revolution, people are too comfortable with themself, they not think about other people. I’m a hard marxist leninist and i would literally kill someone for the sake of revolution and change. I can make bomb. Just waiting for the right time.

    People is not understand something is wrong, even tho they know, they didnt do anything to change it.

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      I get ya 😔 it’s so hard when society feels like it’s falling apart at the seams but everyone is happy just maintain their chicken scratch living.

      Is there no way you can swap jobs or move to a different field? I know that’s very rarely ever feasible (I’m in a similar situation).

      We live in a world where everyone is so downtrodden that as soon as they gain any amount of stability they forget and disregard the plight of those in the same situation they were in moments ago. It really upsets me, pulling the ladder up as you go is a scummy way to live.

      I hope you are okay Comrade 🫂

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      Yes I understand how frustrating people’s lack of determination can be.

      Your friends might be scared or apathetic or content or lazy today, but with your guidance they will be ready to spur into action when crisis hits and the time is right. Most people will not be fanatical about it until their lives are very tangibly at risk.

      We must all be ready to get dirty and make sacrifices, I know I have had to prepare myself to do anything for the communist cause in coming years. We cannot be shy of blood as our enemies are not at all shy to bloody us and the world. Just make sure you are patient and use your abilities to the fullest, as you say for when the time is right.

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      Awwwh thats great! I find that when im healthy my sleep and general mood are waaaay more managable. Its just hard if you get stuck in a rut and the junk food industry relies on people eating it as a comfort food/addictive element of their day. I know it took so much effort to eat healthy for me.

      I think the world could definitely benefit with the idea of excercise being a form of self care.

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        Perhaps you already experience this, but I can say that as I have made efforts to eat healthy, over the years processed sugary cheap foods are no longer attractive at all to me. Not saying I eat totally healthy, but I’m not tempted by a lot of garbage foods, although I will also so when I dabble a bit they do have a sickening addictive element.

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          I’ve found that!

          The longer I can go without them the longer they don’t appeal which shows how vile they are. I still cave sometimes, especially after a drink 😭

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      We do, I mean he was raised and trained by the British to be their stooge only for him to move towards his own version of leftism for the benefit of his people against the British. Can’t respect him more for telling the crown to eat a dick. I won’t pretend to be massively caught up with what he did and was like but his demonisation by the west was exclusively because he wasn’t a angloid bootlicking capitalist right?

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        I don’t know either… but he seems like a good person. if I learn more about him and like him I will maybe do some fan art.

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        Yep. I have similar take on him. When he was “uncontrollable” for them and started doing massive damage to their business in Africa, They demonized and ousted him with a classic CIA backed coup

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    I’m doing pretty solid. Thanks for asking!

    I’ve been making beats (loving Spanish guitars recently), trying to save up for a trip to visit my friend, procrastinating cooking. It’s been raining a lot and I LOVE rain, especially this hard stuff. The streets are all steamy.

    Kudos on the workout and quitting smoking! I myself am on-and-off with both 😅

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      Awwwh that Spanish guitar sound 👌 soo good!

      I love the rain when I’m inside, if I get caught in it I tend to panic.

      Thank you 😊 I’m trying, I’ve caved a bit this week but what’s important is I bounce back!

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        I tend to not mind! Probably one of my Top 3 favorite moments of the last few years was the times I purposefully went out in the rain (getting caught surprised is different), one time to take a long march and sing during a rough rain and the other to take a walk during a HURRICANE which was crazy…a little scary (a lotta scary) but invigorating and exhilarating. So awesome.

        Agreed that is the most important! Worst thing is a black-or-white do-or-die attitude IMO, because then a hiccup turns into a full scale collapse because of the shame. All about the sum of all the little battles. Keep at it!!!

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          Oh wow I’ve seen videos of people out in them but the dangers comes from debris right? Was it a big one or?

          Agreed! That’s so apt though, hiccups turn into full scale collapse! Hahaha my life.