Met a 22 yo in a group I am involved in, she asked if I wanted a lift to a meeting, there and back. I don’t know her very well but she’s young a lot younger than me by 10years.
So talking on the way back she mentions antidepressants, I too take anti depressants, the conversation moves towards SSRIs and sex. I panic because that shit makes me supper uncomfortable, she said some stuff that was a blatant hint. Anyway me and her have activity later in the week for the group we’re in, she’s invited me out for a drink after and being friendly and uncomfortable I said yea sure.
How best to proceed? I don’t want things to be weird and our group get weird as a result. I wish I could set boundaries.
Worth mentioning I have crazy anxiety so don’t judge too hard I mostly run on auto pilot in those situations.
Best to talk to her before anything else and explain that you’re flattered, but not interested. Don’t lead her on.
Oooor, don’t shut everyone and everything out and maybe give it a try? They are both adults nej?
Why are you people so invested in OP having sex he doesn’t want to have with a woman ten years his junior in a way that’s clearly not transparent about intentions?
OP has directly stated that they are uncomfortable with the situation. This isn’t even getting into analysis of social power dynamics yet, OP is uninterested, full stop.
Are you Swedish?
No? On the post, OP cites how she’s 10 years younger than him, making her 12. That’s a huge age gap in that phase of life. Op should just tell her straight away that he doesn’t want to lead her on and that they shouldn’t be going out for now, obviously saying it in a way not to hurt her feelings (which she may not have, but better be safe than sorry especially due to her taking antidepressants)
Op, if you need some other help don’t worry to ask
Read it this way at first too but no - she is 22 and 10 years younger than OP, so OP is 32.
When I was 3 years old, my sister was twice my age. Now my sister is 33, how old am I?
16
66
30
Since this is Lemmy and we’re all ubernerds, maybe add compound interest to the problem or something.
6
Oh, my bad, thx for the correction. Though the problem remains if OP feels anxious about the situation
Oh, totally. It’s just not as bad as you thought
She’s 22
Cheers for the laugh.
Bro… this is a fucking wild comment I hope it’s satirical.
It depends. In which month(s) are your and your sister’s birthdays? Also, when was the first measurement taken? When is the current measurement taken?
This is probably the best approach. I’m a bit of a people pleaser which doesn’t help in these situations, I was lowkey hopping a commenter might suggest avoidance 😂
I know, it sucks, haha. However, the longer you put this off the more invested she will be, so it’s absolutely important to make clear boundaries as soon as you can, without crushing her ego.
Good luck!
Thank you comrade.
No problem comrade!
If you are open to friendship with this person, then you could still go for a drink. It can be nice to have someone who has experienced similar negative things to talk to.