So I was diagnosed with ADHD in my late thirties and before that I was a mess, job to job etc. then got lucky and worked for a company that afforded me the chance to study for my dream job without work pressure.
I am now a software developer and although I went from being the smartest person in the groups I roamed to the dumbest person at work I still have half a foot in my old life of drugs and poor decisions (although the usage has dropped by 95% and I’ve got a good routine and go to bed early).
I feel like a pretentious dick when at a party and someone asks what I do for work, I kinda feel ashamed saying I’m a software developer. Like a fraud I guess.
How to stop this?
A fraud, you say? That’s called imposters syndrome. I suffered big time from it too.
But you went to school and passed the required classes. You’re not a fraud.
I fucked up a bunch in my early years too, until I was diagnosed with a severe form of MTHFR. Once I got on the right meds, my lifelong brainfog went away, and I could suddenly do all the tasks I found so difficult to do prior, including study. Went back to school. Now I design Substations.
I also get the feeling sometimes that I’ve faked my way into the job I have. But no. I went to school and passed the classes. I’m supposed to be here.
So are you.