I always forget we are creatures of habit till that moment hits. I have a relative who is a woodworker, but the reality is they just love collecting wood because they worked at a sawmill as a teenager and talking about wood was all his peers did. I also have a friend who wears the same cologne since childhood because a crush once complimented them on it.
I suppose always being the “good friend” (in their parents eyes) made me more sociable, so now I avoid “events” because I just feel like it’s a game and I don’t want my interactions with other people to feel that way (love small gatherings with a purpose though, the Amish got it right with the barn raising).
What are some that you’ve experienced personally or through someone close to you?
If it was less “come on dude you’ve worked here for x years this isn’t hard” and more “you’re a stupid piece of shit that frankly should quit now”, you have a lot of power. Bully managers are real, and always need to be pushed out of their position of power. It’s always hard speaking out in the moment, but you tried and that’s what you should remember. You can’t go back now to reassert yourself, but you could still take action by reporting it to the company, or asking how your coworker felt about the interaction.
My supervisor is a bit of a bully at times, but it’s not so direct and frequent that I have much of a case for HR, unfortunately. Especially because I often act irrationally with her specifically when my buttons are pushed. If I was a better employee in terms of interpersonal relationships, I could potentially build more of a “case” against her. As it stands, she has plenty of “evidence” to get me fired if I spoke up.
In that particular instance, there was a miscommunication about the lunch schedule. My friend did something to attempt to be helpful, but there was some confusion and it did not go over as intended. My supervisor accused my friend of having a “conspiracy theory” about the lunch schedule, then proceded to lecture her about how much “time was wasted” in the confusion.
My supervisor actually often makes valid points. She just acts like a condescending removed when she does so.