• workerONE@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      76
      ·
      edit-2
      26 days ago

      I had a girlfriend asking me like twice a week for a year- when I was going to propose and then I did and she said no.

      • RubberDuck@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        52
        arrow-down
        8
        ·
        edit-2
        2 months ago

        When they ask you like that… it’s the cue o have a conversation on the F-ing subject. What are your hopes and dreams, kids, quick wedding or elaborate… you know… discuss what the future would hold together.

        Once you have had those conversations you also know what the answer to a proposal will be.

        • workerONE@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          60
          ·
          edit-2
          26 days ago

          We did all of that but then she decided she wanted someone who went to the same church, she told me maybe if I joined her church. Her church beat two children to death trying to expel demons. We actually separated after we couldn’t work it out

        • andrewta@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          14
          arrow-down
          4
          ·
          2 months ago

          To me. They are asking you to propose. If they want to have a conversation there have the fucking conversation. Don’t play games. No one can read minds.

          But it doesn’t matter to me either way. I don’t date. I won’t date. I’m done with dating. And I will never get married.

          • Buddahriffic@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            3
            ·
            2 months ago

            Regardless of what they are asking, you should have that conversation for your own sake, not just theirs. Though I’d also argue that if you are going to get married, you should want to do it for their sake, too. And if you resent them for not speaking their mind, don’t marry them.

          • RubberDuck@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            3
            ·
            edit-2
            2 months ago

            It’s not always playing games… some people also just come out and say it… others will mask it with a joke… but then the conversation needs to be had. Not always full serious… we need to talk… but this is a good cue. As the other poster said … for both your sakes.

            Hope you are OK… don’t know how to read your “I’m don’t with it”.

        • sverit
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          9
          arrow-down
          1
          ·
          2 months ago

          LPT: Don’t give queues that can be severely misunderstood, just fucking ask what you want to know.

      • FelixCress@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        edit-2
        23 days ago

        I had a girlfriend asking me like twice a week for a year- when I was going to propose and then I did and she said no

        Trolling level champion

    • Stern@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      104
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      edit-2
      2 months ago

      The customer is always right in matters of taste. He wants an ugly ring? Jeweler should try and steer him away… but if homey is dead set, get paid in advance and make sure they sign off on the design.

      • themeatbridge@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        22
        ·
        edit-2
        2 months ago

        Yeah, but like… Bruh, are you sure she’s as into Iron Man as you are? I know it was your first date, but she’s going to have to wear this everywhere. She’s going to show it off to her friends and family and coworkers. This bright red abomination that looks like it came in a box of cereal, that’s going to cost at a minimum $50 thousand dollars. Are. You. Sure?

      • Miles O'Brien@startrek.website
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        11
        ·
        2 months ago

        in matters of taste

        Oh my god I just felt my chest release slightly with a tension I didn’t even know was there.

        I never hear the full sentence, people always just cut it off 5 words in for some reason…

      • Buglefingers@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        10
        ·
        2 months ago

        I am always wrong in matters of taste. This is why I get other people to do all tastes for me. This includes my wardrobe

    • errer@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      28
      ·
      edit-2
      2 months ago

      Customer: Did you do it?

      Jeweler: Yes

      Customer: What did it cost?

      Jeweler: Everything

    • ByteOnBikes@slrpnk.net
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      12
      ·
      2 months ago

      Who is to say he didn’t? He probably told him this isn’t going to work out the way he thinks it will, but Delusional Man said, “Bet” and gave him a bag of money.

      • VirtualOdour@sh.itjust.works
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        2 months ago

        Also look at the amount of people just in this thread who got some lord of the rings prop or whatever and loved it - women not being a homogeneous block of feminine virtue actually have their own opinions and taste, they are to the shock of many here actually just people and are often dumb, tasteless, and obsessed by things like marvel or that one fantasy book that got popular.

        Jeweller was* probably like ‘oh another client wants something ugly for their nerd wife, well at least it’s not disney ip this time…’

        *yes I acknowledge this was almost certainly made by a nerd jeweler as a show piece and nor brought by oop as a wedding ring.

    • zarkanian@sh.itjust.works
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      8
      ·
      2 months ago

      Yeah, this reminds me of the time I asked a hair stylist for a mullet and she refused. Also, a good tattoo artist won’t tattoo something that offends their sensibilities.

      • themeatbridge@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        4
        ·
        2 months ago

        Sure, he made the ring as asked. But it’s conceivable to me that the customer only talked to one person about his plan, because any sane person would have tried to talk him out of it. And the jeweler could have made a different choice, and then maybe he would be making anniversary rings, or rings for her jealous friends. Instead, there’s a viral image with his stamp on it, and I just realized this is all probably fake anyway. I’m not a smart man.

    • Kecessa@sh.itjust.works
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      7
      arrow-down
      5
      ·
      2 months ago

      I’ve got a friend who’s a jeweler and if he’s asked to engrave something where there’s a typo he won’t say a thing, he does it as is and keeps a copy of the original to show the client if they come back, it’s not his place to question them.

      • AhismaMiasma@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        15
        ·
        2 months ago

        That’s a shit jeweler just begging for less return customers.

        Ain’t gotta make a big deal of it either. Just ask, “Okay so you want, ‘No ragrets’ engraved?”

      • Asafum@feddit.nl
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        9
        ·
        edit-2
        2 months ago

        That sounds kind of petty to be honest. I’d just send an email or leave a voicemail and wait a day as long as I can still meet whatever deadline I had set. Everyone makes mistakes and it seems like it would be hard on everyone involved to have to do it over again.

        If it’s a name, then yeah I wouldn’t question them though lol

  • RandomLegend [He/Him]@lemmy.dbzer0.com
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    110
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    2 months ago

    i will never understand that stupid craze about expensive engagement rings… i engaged to my wife without a ring. It was just a very emotional situation, i was sure that i wanted to ask her… and then i just asked. No ring, no special event planned out or something… just asked her, and she said yes.

    People paying cars worth of money for a ring is so unbelievable for me.

    • sicarius@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      91
      ·
      2 months ago

      I gave my wife a ring made out of coconut. Cost me $2 and she instantly dropped it off the balcony if the resturaunt we were at. The Thai owner of the place climbed off the balcony into the boulder field underneath and spent 20 minutes looking for it. Even after I explained that it was only a cheap coconut ring. He said the price isn’t the point, it’s the memories!
      He found it, what a legend.

      • bane_killgrind@slrpnk.net
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        31
        ·
        2 months ago

        I carved a wood ring for her, and she was surprised I popped the question after I was carving it in front of her and sizing it against her finger

      • Mac@mander.xyz
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        9
        ·
        2 months ago

        Thai restaurant owner is right: it’s not the cost—it’s the memories.

    • deegeese@sopuli.xyz
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      27
      ·
      2 months ago

      “Once upon a time” an expensive engagement ring worked as a sort of bride price and was a hedge against the risk of premarital sex.

        • yeather@lemmy.ca
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          21
          ·
          edit-2
          2 months ago

          Back in ye olden times, you would pay a bride price to the parents of the bride, both symbolizing the eternal debt you owed to your wife and as a way to show you had plenty of money to spare to take care of your wife. You would then give your wife a dower, sonething they could hold onto in case you lost all your money or she became suddenly widowed. This historically was property but became rings or jewelry with expensive stones. The wife would take the dower as a sign she would no longer need to worry, and in exchange be a maiden on her wedding night. These practices were only for the wealthy, until indistrialization brought the practice to a growing middle class. Then, in the early to mid 1900s, marketing campaigns began associating the price of a ring to the love you felt for your wife, leading us to today.

          • Drusas@fedia.io
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            3
            ·
            2 months ago

            I still don’t see how an expensive dower would prevent the couple from having sex before getting married, but I guess I’m just too modern-minded.

              • Drusas@fedia.io
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                2
                ·
                2 months ago

                That seems so much less likely to happen than the couple sleeping together themselves.

        • deegeese@sopuli.xyz
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          12
          ·
          2 months ago

          Doesn’t prevent it, but gives the girl collateral if the guy breaks off the engagement afterwards.

          • alcoholicorn
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            2
            ·
            2 months ago

            Diamond rings are basically worth fuckall for resale. Most pawn shops won’t even take them

    • cobysev@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      22
      ·
      2 months ago

      Back when my wife and I were still dating, she found a cheap ring she loved. It was just a normal jewelry ring with her favorite stones in it, not a fancy engagement ring or anything. But she loved it so much, she told me that if I ever proposed to her, she gave me permission to steal it from her and re-present it as an engagement ring. Which I did.

      I felt bad about it though. I took the ring to propose, but my plans fell through and it took me a few more days to arrange a new proposal plan. She had forgotten all about our conversation, so the whole time she was tearing the house apart, looking for her favorite ring. She loved that I “found” it and gave it back to her with a proposal.

    • Riven@lemmy.dbzer0.com
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      13
      ·
      2 months ago

      I got my fiancee a gold cat bell instead of a ring. Granted it was a bit pricey but it has special meaning to us and it was definitely not worth cars amount of money like some people spend.

    • stringere@sh.itjust.works
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      12
      ·
      2 months ago

      I gave my wife Nenya, a replica of Galadriel’s ring from Lord of the Rings made by WETA who are the folks that did the movie props. Silver and cubic zirconia ost $75. Mine was $14, wood and platinum. We’re 9 years in and going strong.

    • snooggums@midwest.social
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      42
      ·
      2 months ago

      He didn’t say what he made in 18 months. He might just sell Santa themed toilet seat covers during the holidays and isn’t aware of how to advertise.

  • Etterra@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    43
    ·
    2 months ago

    Okay so here’s a tip that I didn’t need to be told because I figured out of my own. Ask her what she likes. If you don’t want to do that for whatever stupid reason, then casually point out a ring you saw and ask her what she thinks. There are subtle ways to handle it. “I saw a wedding ring that used a sapphire, what do you think of that” or “hey look at the ring in this picture I saw online,” then listen to her opinion. If you do that a few times she might start to actually realize that you’re going to ask her to marry you and give you useful feedback, assuming she doesn’t state something useful in the meantime, such as “diamond would be better” or “I like that design but not the gemstones.”

    Of course if you haven’t talked about that kind of thing already, clearly you’re doing something wrong. My fiancee knew I was going to ask her to marry her, just not when or how. Well she figured out on the day that was coming because your girl is almost certainly better at picking up on subtlety than you are, especially when it comes to you.

    • dafo@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      11
      ·
      2 months ago

      We did something like that. We both had talked about getting married, so we were both on the same page (this is very important). We both went and looked at rings, decided which we’d want and which sizes fit us, then I bought them and asked the jewler to engrave the date of the proposal. The wife wasn’t allowed to see, obviously, so she only knew that it was going to happen *someday * but not when.

      The date went great and she said yes. Everyone happy.

      I recommend my colleague to do the same. He did not. Now he’s trying to return the ring which is both too big and wrong style.

      • Etterra@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        4
        ·
        2 months ago

        Over heard it says that the engagement itself should never be a surprise, just the when and where.

        Oh and I’ll add in to listen to her if she says she wants/doesn’t want something specific. If she doesn’t want it to be a big public thing, then don’t propose on the stadium fan-cam. If she likes hiking, do it while hiking (but not somewhere the ring can fall in a river or off a cliff). Stuff like that.

      • three@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        2 months ago

        I found out i was getting married when my wife asked, “is it weird i am looking at engagement rings?” I was like, “haha. I guess we are getting married”.

    • ilinamorato@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      2 months ago

      if you haven’t talked about that kind of thing already, clearly you’re doing something wrong.

      Yep. There are some cases where you should know the answer before you ask the question. Proposals are one of those cases.

  • JusticeForPorygon@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    36
    ·
    2 months ago

    I don’t even get how it’s iron man 3 themed? The Mk 42 was mostly gold

    This looks more reminiscent of the suit he wore at the beginning of Iron Man 2

    • hitmyspot@aussie.zone
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      9
      ·
      2 months ago

      My first date with my husband, we went for dinner. I’m not going to want a broccoli themed ring. This is just odd. If she was a big iron man fan, perhaps it would work but just seeing a movie once isn’t that. This speaks not just to bad choices but a lack of maturity and understanding each other. Probably good she said no.

      • Hacksaw@lemmy.ca
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        5
        ·
        2 months ago

        I made this to commemorate your first date with your husband, will you marry me and wear this on your finger forever?

    • yuri@pawb.social
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      42
      ·
      2 months ago

      It is pretty, but:

      1. Colored rhodium is garbo, that plating will wear off faster than you’d think. Regular ass white rhodium is already the most expensive precious metal, 1 gram suspended in plating solution is nearly $500 COST. I’ve literally never heard of a store having anything other than white on hand.

      2. ALLLLL of their products are only represented with 3d renderings. This is a HUGE red flag. If someone isn’t even bothering to have physical models of their products made, they have no way of guaranteeing the quality of those products. It looks snaggy as fuck, and it probably is because they never actually made one to try on!

      3. Jesus christ imagine wearing that thing. The tongues on those snakes would be fucked IMMEDIATELY. The spikes on top of those prongs would get absolutely ruined in between ripping apart every piece of fabric you moved it near. If you ever need ONE prong retipped you’ll either have to lose the spikes on all of them, or just deal with them mismatching. That WHOLE ASS HEAD is so atypical and seated strangely that even IF you managed to wear it for years, long enough to necessitate the kind of general maintenance all jewelry eventually needs, you’ll end up getting shrugged at and told “yeah I don’t know how anyone could work on this”. Even IF you got someone to work on it, that finish is gonna need touched up, which is AGAIN, something no one outside of the manufacturer will do for a reasonable price. There’s not even a good way to strip off the existing rhodium, so you’d end up with black shit stuck in all the crevasses.

      I think they’re very striking, but I swear to god y’all, my store will get at least one flyer every week from some new manufacturer with a line EXACTLY like this. Buncha whacky way-off-the-beaten-path design choices, there’s no actual pictures of anything, and the markup is frankly embarrassing. Regular ass jewelry stores like mine could have this shit custom made as a complete 1-off for LESS than what they’re selling it for, don’t buy jewelry online folks 💖

      • shuzuko@midwest.social
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        12
        ·
        2 months ago

        Holy balls, I didn’t even zoom in to look at the prongs on that serpent ring. That’s the kind of design made by someone who only ever designs shit and never has to work on the physical product. It looks cool but no one will ever bother to attempt to recreate that if they need to do maintenance. Plus I could easily see the little circles just, bending off and OOP, there goes the stone. There’s a reason prongs are designed the way they are.

        Fucking design nerds 🙄 and I say that as someone with more design experience than practical experience - but at least I fucking listen to actual bench jewelers when I do my CAD work.

      • zarkanian@sh.itjust.works
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        6
        ·
        2 months ago

        you’d end up with black shit stuck in all the crevasses.

        Crevices. A crevasse is a deep fissure such as in a glacier.

      • CaptSatelliteJack@lemy.lol
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        2 months ago

        Hey, I have a jewelry question totally unrelated to the post I’d like to ask, if you don’t mind. I wanna do a custom articulated ring for my fiance (I know, please hold your applause for my incredible taste). Is this a design I should work out with a jeweler, or do I need a machinist first, and then a jeweler to pretty up whatever they come up with?

        • yuri@pawb.social
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          2
          ·
          2 months ago

          Coming from a jeweler’s perspective I’d say always start with the jeweler, but I may be a bit biased hahaha

          Even if they can’t come up with the design you’re looking for, hopefully they can at least explain the limitations for such a design. From there you could have anyone with an eye for mechanical stuff take a crack at it. If you could get a 3d model of all the parts, modern casters will just print it in lost wax and cast the parts for you. Ideally the jeweler sets that up for you.

          The biggest expense should be the casting. Gold is the highest it’s ever been right now, I’d recommend 10k yellow or 14k white for the strength. The actual assembly will probably be a little pricey, but a good jeweler will work out a cost by pricing individual welds and whatnot. “Assemble this custom one off ring” sounds like it should be a hugely expensive thing, but if it’s just 5 welds and a couple hinges, realistically that would only be a couple hundred as a repair job.

    • shuzuko@midwest.social
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      16
      ·
      2 months ago

      Jfc

      So, my husband is a jeweler. We recently started our own business (mostly repairs right now). These things are largely poorly designed and way overpriced for what they are. Plus, there’s a lot of bullshit like “14k black gold”, which isn’t a thing. It’s possibly 14k white or yellow gold with black rhodium plating, which will wear off in about 2 years and need replating. And there’s one with a 1.5ish carat diamond and a few melee marquis, with no other detailing or anything particularly interesting other than the “14k black gold” bullshit, and they’re trying to sell it for over $10,000 usd. Fucking LOL. This site is trash.

      • yuri@pawb.social
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        2 months ago

        whenever someone brings something to our store with worn off black rodium, we’ll do the regular clean/check/polish and then just use an industrial black marker to fill it in. we don’t charge for it, and it’ll actually last a long time if it doesn’t see heavy wear!

        the alternative is spending at least $400 for something you’ll use like 4 times a year. PLUS you’ll have to charge for it, and no one wants to pay for a full rhodium just to replace what is most likely a single tiny accent of their jewelry hahahah

        keep at it with the repair work, that’s the lifeblood of a good jewelry store. people like the store they bought their trendy new ring at, but they LOVE the store that made their old ring new again.

    • BrowseMan@sh.itjust.works
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      5
      ·
      edit-2
      2 months ago

      Ouah… 138 pages of rings ? I’ve only checked a few and didn’t find anything I found nice.

      Won’t waste more of my life to see if there actually is though.

  • kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    15
    ·
    edit-2
    2 months ago

    I mean, it’s at least worth the value of the stones and the raw materials of the band if it’s recoverable without it all being red. But that is some “Holy Autism, Batman,” levels of understanding what women, or any halfway average person would want.

  • drunkpostdisaster@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    19
    arrow-down
    5
    ·
    edit-2
    2 months ago

    Am I the only one who thinks this looks cool? If he said nothing about it being related to Iron Man 3 (one of the worst MCU movies at the time) I think it would have been acceptable. Wedding rings a fucking stupid anyway buying an expensive one just means you are a mark who does not deserve money.