Sorry for my somewhat unrelated comment (I unfortunately do not know of any explicitly safe servers :( ), but if anyone’s interested in making a server, consider using the following mod which adds pronoun tags to players. I was disappointed to see that no server that I tried was using it (or perhaps it just wasn’t advertised or presented in a GUI interface). (I haven’t tested it myself, but it seems like a feature every server should have)
https://content.luanti.org/packages/prestidigitator/pronouns/
I always mix up push and pull. They sound too similar to me and the time it takes me to think what I’m supposed to do, I’m already applying force in the wrong direction (or I conclude that push means to apply force towards me, because I end up mixing them up).