• PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmygrad.ml
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    2 years ago

    I’m completely devastated right now. Everyone should know Jesus was a Pole? Right? RIGHT?

    Except maybe some heretics saying he was a Russian and was named Jesus Ipanienko (according to polish christmas carol).

      • VictimOfReligion@lemmygrad.ml
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        2 years ago

        Which is super funny, that they portray it so mythical when it was allegedly during his time on Earth as a living man lmao.

        I think people don’t get the Ieus Rex part lol

          • VictimOfReligion@lemmygrad.ml
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            2 years ago

            Iueus*, sorry. “Jewish” in Latin.

            Yet the character was described as “son of man”, and… Oh, sorry, I forgot the many contradictions in the Evangelions.

            • Yet the character was described as “son of man”, and…

              I wasn’t really implying that he might’ve had supernatural powers. I was more so referring to the times when he did deeds like putting rich people in their place and feeding the hungry; despite just being a carpenter.

              How many people do you think in his time was capable of doing that?

      • PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmygrad.ml
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        2 years ago

        But surely… he was not… a Jew? And even if he was a Jew, the jewish god is also not… jewish???

        Just what our continent did in the last two millenia?

        • Aria 🏳️‍⚧️🇧🇩 [she]@lemmygrad.ml
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          2 years ago

          Well, at the very least we can’t deny that Jesus is of Middle Eastern origin. He could’ve been Jewish, I can’t say; as Bethelhem (where he was born) is part of Palestine; and I honestly don’t know if Historical Palestine had Jews in it.

          CW: Personal Criticism of Christianity and the Abrahimic God's Origins

          As for the Abrahimic God, well, it turns out that he was just one of the deities of a Pagan Religion. The God of War, in fact. (No, it’s not Kratos unfortunately; it’s Yahweh). And this was before Judaism was a thing, too, so, I guess technically he’s not Jewish???

          Though honestly all this has probably happened simply because Mary Magdalene had secretly cheated on Joseph; and then - in order to avoid execution, lied when she gave birth to Jesus; claiming that she didn’t fuck anyone and that it was simply a miracle birth. And people just bought it.

          The three guys that showed up at her doorstep to give her gifts were probably people that she fucked dated at some point in her life; or at the very least, were her simps.

          • PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmygrad.ml
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            2 years ago

            Yeah newer archeology finds strongly suggest that exodus never happened, ancient Hebrews were just one of the canaanite tribes that gained domination over their region and per usual for that time and place, placed their own tribal deity over all others. Notably the most popular local god of harvest, and natural cycle Baal (all the vilification of Baal in bible was certainly scrap of that propaganda left). Yahweh even stole Baal name, meaning only “Lord”. Yahweh being god of war also fits by all accounts. Judaism was formed after ancient state of Israel fell so that’s how the victorious god of war gets to hate his people, they just lost lmao. And most texts were compliled at their lowest point as independent culture, in Babylon, which also explains some peculiarities - city rabbis living in richest city in the world were depicting the past they couldn’t really imagine.

            About Mary and Joseph it starts to click if you would assume she was not just a poor girl but daughter of a local notable - she get pregnant (Pantera? lol maybe, he did existed, his tombstone was found) in a tender age of 13 or 14, scandal is brewing, but her family found her an older and respected guy to marry, Joseph, who would take the child for his own. Some hand polishing later the Holy Family is created (now that is sheer assumption by me without single proof but probably better than the official version).

            The three guys that showed up at her doorstep to give her gifts were probably people that she fucked dated at some point in her life; or at the very least, were her simps.

            XD local pedo convention, how did this turned to 3 kings.

            • Aria 🏳️‍⚧️🇧🇩 [she]@lemmygrad.ml
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              2 years ago

              Notably the most popular local god of harvest, and natural cycle Baal (all the vilification of Baal in bible was certainly scrap of that propaganda left).

              Unbelievable. Imagine demonizing a deity of something as harmless and peaceful as harvest and natural cycle.

              Judaism was formed after ancient state of Israel fell so that’s how the victorious god of war gets to hate his people, they just lost lmao

              There’s nothing more pathetic than a so-called deity hating their own worshippers. Couldn’t he help his worshippers out? Being a god of war and all.

              Also, if Mary indeed was the daughter of a local noble, wouldn’t her parents be able to just use their connections/power/money to just get her out of trouble? But then again I suppose not, as this was from the times where women were barely considered human for whatever reason.

              XD local pedo convention, how did this turned to 3 kings.

              They were kings? o.o

              • PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmygrad.ml
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                2 years ago

                Unbelievable. Imagine demonizing a deity of something as harmless and peaceful as harvest and natural cycle.

                Tbh he was not harmless deity. Think more of a late antique Dionysos or Mithra, he was born, fought with his enemies, die and then be resurrected as many other antique gods which were ultimately hijacked to form the myth of the resurrection of Christ (this always seemed to me like loosely fitting magic addition put there to entice the pagans to join).

                There’s nothing more pathetic than a so-called deity hating their own worshippers. Couldn’t he help his worshippers out? Being a god of war and all.

                Well he once did send Engels (whoops, german version) angel to kill hundreds of thousands Assyrians, but later he seems to cool off on that. I mean it is pretty rational for war god to hate his people for constantly losing, but then why even worship him? The Lost Tribes did exactly that i bet.

                Also, if Mary indeed was the daughter of a local noble, wouldn’t her parents be able to just use their connections/power/money to just get her out of trouble?

                They did it. They might not be some high noble but local gentry, so by that epoch standards avoiding the scandal while not killing or exiling anyone was pretty successful from the society point of view. And since Jesus was apparently also part of local gentry the scandal was avoided. Well if we go along that line i bet there was no scandal at all and Mary was just wed to Joseph quite conventionally and Jesus was concieved also pretty conventionally :)

                They were kings?

                Traditionally they are Magi i think, but also very often called and depicted as “kings” in catholicism at least. We just had 06.01 holiday of Epiphany, in Poland called “Święto Trzech Króli” (“Three Kings’ Day”) and it’s… a state holiday, free from work, if you ever had doubts how much modern Poland is secular state.

                • CannotSleep420@lemmygrad.ml
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                  2 years ago

                  Well he once did send Engels (whoops, german version) angel to kill hundreds of thousands Assyrians

                  So if I read your posts right, the Hebrews coped and seethed so hard over getting their asses kicked repeatedly they made up stories about their imaginary friend genociding the ones who beat them? If so, that is a literally a cope of biblical proportions.

                  • PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmygrad.ml
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                    2 years ago

                    Well they did outlasted Assyrians so they had the last word.

                    Anyway that siege of Jerusalem did really happened, circa 701 BCE, Assyrians under king Sennaherib against Judeans of king Hezekiah. Unknown what happened, but the city was not captured. Most likely the besieging army suffered sudden and horrible plague (Herodotus also note the event, though he wrote about mice infestation) like bubonic plague or something like this. Judah was nominally vassalized and paid tribut but was not conquered. Also Assyrian army was no way 200000 strong, even 20000 was streching it.

                    Overall, it is pretty normal in those times to attribute sudden plague saving their skin (NeoAssyrian empire was not very merciful conqueror) to their god. Hell, a lot of Poles even said the same about victory over Soviets in 1920 and that battle was pretty good documented as genuine rational conclusion by even Soviets.

                  • VictimOfReligion@lemmygrad.ml
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                    2 years ago

                    Literally YES. The Genesis 1 is a copy or Enuma Ellish.

                    Also, remember that the Yahwehist had to struggle to keep their people be under their influence, since we all know that a quick study shows how religions originate to maintain class submission since Mesopotamia, at least in the"West".

                • VictimOfReligion@lemmygrad.ml
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                  2 years ago

                  Oh, in Spain we have too the Kings’ Day too, which it’s the 5th(or 6th?) of January, and the eve is a parade of pseugo ancient parafernalia with horses and even sometimes camels, and like Santa Claus, they bring presents to children.

                  But I prefer our (Catalonia) originally pagan present bringer for children, i which on Christmas Eve, children give sweets to a log with legs, face and a barretina (a traditional hat), cover it with blanquets, wait for the “log to eat the sweets”, and then, congregate around the log and performing a BDSM ritual which consists in children beating the fuck out of the log while chanting “Tió, Tió, shit out nougat and presents”, and then, supposedly the log shits out presents and Christmas food.

                  Ah, I love it.

                  • PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmygrad.ml
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                    2 years ago

                    Funnily enough in Poland nobody really fest that holiday. it was unremarkable and pretty much disappeared during the socialism era, even priests who traditionally made tours around their parishes around that time (“kolęda”) started to do it even month before.

                    So when the modern bourgeois government (liberal!) introduced it as state holiday in 2010 most people were kinda baffled why even, the resons were apparently to demostrate bootlicking of the church and pre-war fash Poland (a lot of stupid things and some catastrophical were done in post 1989 Poland from sole reason of “it was like there before the war”).

                    Of course free day is welcomed, nobody would argue that. Well except bourgeoisie who did, but our national bourgeoisie also bootlick church hierarchy so they only grumbled somewhat.

                • Hijacked? How?

                  I mean it is pretty rational for war god to hate his people for constantly losing, but then why even worship him?

                  I guess to prove to him that they’re still worth something in some other way? As self-punishment for disappointing their deity?

                  We just had 06.01 holiday of Epiphany, in Poland called “Święto Trzech Króli” (“Three Kings’ Day”) and it’s… a state holiday, free from work, if you ever had doubts how much modern Poland is secular state.

                  What places were they kings of then? Also interesting that Kings would just show up on their own just to deliver gifts to a girl they know nothing about… unless, like I said, they were her simps. (But even then wouldn’t they just send their men instead? Just to keep their reputation from sullying)

                  Also, can’t complain about a free holiday. But that gets me thinking, did Jesus ever teach/preach about Ethnonationalism? It’s honestly mesmerizing that for a Christian Nation, its people would rather be dicks towards people that aren’t exactly 100% them.

                  • PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmygrad.ml
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                    2 years ago

                    Hijacked? How?

                    Christianity, especially catholicism, is in fact the most syncretic religion in history full of things taken from pagan religions, and then put under the single hegemony. but it did immensely helped it spread and they did it even centuries later. In this case, read about resurrecting gods, there was many of them and especially Dionysus and Mithra were straight up competition for early christianity. If not for emperor Constantine, we might be as well discussing about Mithraism right now (which would be probably very much identical to christianity).

                    I guess to prove to him that they’re still worth something in some other way? As self-punishment for disappointing their deity?

                    Well, martyrdom and mortification is very popular in abrahamic religions for a reason.

                    What places were they kings of then?

                    Unspecified. It is mostly folk thing that became popular for no reason.

                    It’s honestly mesmerizing that for a Christian Nation, its people would rather be dicks towards people that aren’t exactly 100% them.

                    Problem is, you can take the Bible, and by creative quoting, you will get justification for basically anything.

                  • VictimOfReligion@lemmygrad.ml
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                    2 years ago

                    Well… The kings/wizards thing we can assure never happened, like Herodes “killing of the innocent”.

                    And basically all the Jesus narrative neither, which is suspiciously simmilar to a lot of Hellenistic and not so Hellenistic heroes of ancient, about kings being rised in pastoral humility.

                    And… Well… Jesus himself was racist as fuck, and under the Christian visage, every non believer is like an animated corpse.

              • VictimOfReligion@lemmygrad.ml
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                2 years ago

                For your info Genesis 1 is newer than Genesis2, and 1 is made after Enuma Elish, which is the creation myth in honor of Marduk, the patron deity of the Akkadians, who kicked Hebrews’s asses and sent them to Babylon.

              • VictimOfReligion@lemmygrad.ml
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                2 years ago

                In catholic tradition, the wise men were converted in three warlock kings, when the Bible actually referred to Magis(Zoroastrian sacerdots)