• Sergio@slrpnk.net
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    11 minutes ago

    I know all greentexts are fake, but:

    • get a job at local walmart / krogers / etc. Try doing full time but if you can only handle part-time, stick with that
    • after doing that for a while (at least 3-4 months, pref. at least a year) go to the local community college and ask about doing a GED (high school diploma)
    • take it slow at first. maybe one class at a time. try to work your way up to 3-4 classes, OR 1-2 classes while holding down a job. keep an eye out for a better job.
    • once you’re getting toward the end of your GED, talk to your counselor about your career goals.
  • _____@lemm.ee
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    4 hours ago

    I played so many games from 8yo to 22yo that I legit ran out of games to play, I emulated old consoles. I played on good hardware, I played competitive games, single player. at some point after my first year out of highschool I was like damn I’ve rna out of games to play.

    I guess it helped that the game industry ran out of juice in the last decade or so and the number of games that interest me plummeted (probably because I’m older also)

    • tetris11
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      7 minutes ago

      Same. Nothing really seems to grab me anymore. For the past decade or so, I mostly look up last years top N games, filter for the offline ones, pick one that seems good nix of story/gameplay, and then play it for a couple of days straight (with cheats/trainers to jump the grindey parts).

      Afterwards, I’m done. Back to normal schedule. See you next year, games.

  • graycube@lemmy.world
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    8 hours ago

    It sounds like you’d be comfortable in prison. There is probably a Luigi to-do list somewhere you could pick a name from and then arrange to join him in a neighboring cell.

    • TheSlad@sh.itjust.works
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      6 hours ago

      Hoenstly, probably better than being homeless. Life in prison as a local hero among inmates for deposing a capitalist.

  • haywire@lemmy.world
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    10 hours ago

    Clean yourself up and find a rich spouse?

    Win the lottery?

    Insurance fraud?

    No? I got nothing.

  • atro_city@fedia.io
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    11 hours ago

    Use a voice changer and become a twitch streamer with one of those female anime avatars. Hoards of desperate guys will throw themselves at his feet to try and catch a glimpse of the real person behind the anime avatar.

      • rumschlumpel@feddit.org
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        10 hours ago

        Word. I’ve been watching a really good Streamer who makes her own models, she has very little viewers compared to how consistently she has been streaming for several years and how good her streams are (IMO). She has other sources of income so it’s not a big deal for her, but if you were trying to get out of unemployment with that it seems really tough.

        • sigmaklimgrindset@sopuli.xyz
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          4 hours ago

          Yeah , Twitch/YT have the worst promotional and discovery algorithms for streaming creators/entertainers. Every streamer I watch that isn’t from the early days of Twitch/Justin.tv says they had to build a content creation platform elsewhere and move them to Twitch to get any movement. And these creators still only get 500-2000 viewers at most.

        • atro_city@fedia.io
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          9 hours ago

          Why? This dude has nothing but time. He was on the parents’ dime for more than a decade.

          • Simulation6@sopuli.xyz
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            8 hours ago

            Would need $$ for equipment to get started
            Would need knowledge to set the whole thing up
            Would need to be able to talk and interest dudes to attract and retain clients Individual described does not seem like a genius or go-getter that could pull this off

            • LH0ezVT@sh.itjust.works
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              5 hours ago

              Yeah, and the being funny and charismatic part is nontrivial. If you are the born entertainer already, sure. If not, well…

    • Korhaka@sopuli.xyz
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      8 hours ago

      You could AI generate some pictures too, video requires more effort but images you can just use one of the free services to generate pictures by typing in something anon can almost understand like “hawt gurl”

  • Th4tGuyII@fedia.io
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    12 hours ago

    Unless Anon is willing to put in some serious work, like properly going back to school or busting their ass learning (and getting good at) a trade, then their life is kinda fucked.

    You can’t just crawl out of almost 20 years of NEETing into really any kind of job, especially without the charisma to at least try masking it.

    Also fuck knows why Anon’s parents just let them drop out of school and basically cease to exist outside of playing videogames for best part of two decades. That’s plain bad parenting.

    • Eyedust@sh.itjust.works
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      8 hours ago

      Agreed. I NEETed for five years. Never left my apartment, sponged off my gf, terrified of going out. Even that long is hard to get out of.

      Thankfully I kept my weight mostly in check and I still had some humble charisma when I needed to interact with people. This let me seek help which culminated in severe anxiety and sleep apnea diagnoses.

      Let me tell you, though. Even 5 years is enough to make any sort of potential employer wrinkle their nose at your application. I had to dig hard through my grave topsoil.

    • FireRetardant@lemmy.world
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      8 hours ago

      I have friends in these situations where they dropped out and they somehow hold themselves above a minimum wage job with stuff like “I’m worth more than that”, " I’m over qualified to flip burgers", and “i can’t move out on that wage”. I try to tell them they at least have to work some basic position just to prove to future employers you can actually show up each shift. Completing highschool on a resume isn’t just an education. It shows you’re willing to stick through something even if it wasnt fun or got difficult at times and can be one of the first signs to an employer that you have potential to be reliable.

      I get it, it does suck making minimim wage and it might not be enough to move out of moms basement tomorrow, but after 20 years in moms basement its gonna take work to get outta there.

  • Steve Dice@sh.itjust.works
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    12 hours ago

    That sounds like a very severe case of untreated depression. I know anon is 33 but where the fuck were his parents for the first 20 years of their life?

    • insomniac_lemon@lemmy.cafe
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      8 hours ago

      The last 2 lines of the text make it sound like bait if the 6-figure thing wasn’t a joke (otherwise, delusional). Depression likely, if not other health issues that led to this.

      I am not quite as bad as the text but for me: parents are doing their own thing (these days, computer time), almost as isolated as I am.

      It probably helps that I do tasks for them (mostly sweeping, unloading dishwasher/garbage, carrying firewood etc). Not that I can do much given that I, much like they (who are anti-doctor), have untreated health issues. Seemingly is enough they don’t threaten to kick me out (though maybe they know that I would just leave with no place to go, and likely die).

      Also it was unlikely in car-centric areas of the USA as-it-was

      but I don’t think there’s hard-working out of this after medicaid is gutted (not that was even an easily accessible path before).

      Maybe anon can lose 50 pounds, get a hobby, and leave the house a few times a month when the weather is nice… but probably not getting a job/moving out with no help while the government implodes and normal people were already struggling to pay bills.

      • dev_null
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        6 hours ago

        The 6-figues line could very well be a joke without the story being untrue.

    • ma1w4re@lemm.ee
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      12 hours ago

      The parents were most likely thinking that the problem will resolve itself and it’s just temporary. Speaking as a person that will write a similar greentext in 9 years.

      • LH0ezVT@sh.itjust.works
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        5 hours ago

        Honestly? I know nothing about your situation. So maybe this is completely off. In that case, sorry for being cliche. But try burger flipping (or shelve packing, or…) at least once. In the worst case, you have a better reason to hate the system now, in the best case, you get some routine. Or, I don’t know, help some people with stuff. Does not even matter what it is. But humans were not meant to do nothing.

      • normanwall@lemmy.world
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        10 hours ago

        I hope you find something you are interested in

        My life would be much easier now and Id be able to buy whatever I wanted if I had applied myself earlier instead of just coasting and partying

  • jqubed@lemmy.world
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    14 hours ago

    How hard are 6 figure jobs to get?

    High School dropout NEET directly to 6-figure would probably need to involve selling drugs or something, right?

    • subtext@lemmy.world
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      6 hours ago

      I mean they’re not hard if you’re willing to go to a trade school and then put in long hours as a welder or something.

      I’m getting the feeling though that that will be off the table.

    • shades@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      13 hours ago

      involve selling drugs or something, right?

      Q: ¿What’s the difference between a prostitute and a drug dealer?

      A: ¡A prostitute can wash their crack and sell it again!

    • Shortstack@reddthat.com
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      12 hours ago

      Let’s be real, anon would be back in his cave within the first week. You don’t go 2 decades of not lifting a finger to being a hard worker no matter what the pay is

      • rtxn@lemmy.world
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        11 hours ago

        2 decades of not lifting a finger to being a hard worker

        That’s more or less what happened to me. Dropped out of university, a year of unemployment, then I found a factory job where I could spend most of the time operating machines instead of conversing with people. The pay was extremely average, but I ended up becoming one of the most productive workers simply because I liked the job.

        That was until the early pandemic supply chain issues caused productivity to implode, the veteran talent left, management doubled in size, so did overtime (well paid as it was), and I decided my health was more important.

    • stoy@lemmy.zip
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      13 hours ago

      Nah, getting a 6 figure job is easy, just make sure you are born to parents with contacts in the top leaderships of several good companies and who like you enough to give you a do-nothing-job

      • imaqtpie@sh.itjust.works
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        13 hours ago

        Meh you still need basic social skills. Even for a nepotistic job, you have to be socially aware enough to pretend that you do something. Otherwise the contacts who gave you the job are going to be pissed off about you embarrassing them.

        • reallykindasorta@slrpnk.net
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          3 hours ago

          But you DON’T need to know how to save something as a pdf or find your downloads folder. In fact, if you can do either of those things they can’t allow you on the leadership team. It’s a tough line to walk.

    • rumschlumpel@feddit.org
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      13 hours ago

      Drug trade seems ill-advised if you have that little social skills. Where do you get your drugs? How do you avoid getting stabbed etc. by your buyers and the people who sell to you? A lot of these people are aggressive and carry weapons, you really don’t want to be the type who doesn’t have the social awareness to avoid pissing them off accidentally.

      • RVGamer06@sh.itjust.works
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        3 hours ago

        Maybe Darknet Markets would be an option then. You can’t get stabbed through the screen and trust becomes a matter of cryptography instead of social deduction. But you need some non-trivial computer skills and a healthy dose of paranoia.

        • umbrella
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          12 minutes ago

          im surprised those arent all cia honeypots already

  • thefluffiest@feddit.nl
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    13 hours ago

    OP sounds like THE person to found a tech startup, sell a load of bull, get rich off ephemeral VC money, cozy up to Trump and join the dismantling of the US.

    US career advice AD2025. No brain cells or social skills necessary

      • Jiggle_Physics@sh.itjust.works
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        14 minutes ago

        Very much is. Is BSing corpos to get somewhere easier than working for it? Sure. However, you actually need to be good at BSing, you need to know your mark, and you need to be able to make yourself someone those people like. There are not that many people out there really capable of this.