Aliens want to communicate and they decide to use you and your personality as the base model for all humans. Is this a good thing or a bad thing?
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UN: “Boy, they really like using Star Trek memes to convey their thoughts…”
All the Me clones: Sokath, his eyes opened.
Riker: 🍆 💦
Turns out Star Trek was just a retelling of actual intergalactic life
Aliens: Who the hell told them all this stuff … I don’t look like that? … My ass isn’t that fat … Is it?
“These beings have documented a perfect understanding of warp core, matter transmission, and matter replication technologies, yet they refuse to actually use any them and are stuck on a single planet fighting wars over limited resources.”
Well as someone with ADHD, depression, and anxiety, as well as being on the spectrum, initially we’d be kinda screwed. I have spent a lot of time in therapy and have done a lot to manage it all, as well as developing empathy for myself and others, so not so bad.
However, I choose to be a non-theistic Satanist and an anarchist, so a lot of other people are going to be fucked. Especially those that deserve no empathy due to their hoarding of resources and exploitation of people and the planet.
I’ll gladly take aliens trying to cure me of an ADHD and depression i don’t have if they can also cure us of religions and capitalism.
More importantly you going to therapy and improving yourself the way you described it, that in itself is sincerely the best exemple we can show an alien, ever.
Intergalactic Therapy Industrial Complex rubbing their hands
Well yes please, fix us.
Although i doubt we have anything worthy of hand rubbing for them. But hey, at least we’re making jobs!
Seems i am going to be just fine after all.
Seriously though how did you write something so personal and yet described my life so well.
Like the only difference is that you are a non theist satanist anarchist. While i am an agnostic spiritual anarchist having Jesus (but not god) as an example of a good.
I like that it takes becoming satanic to develop a civilized view of the world. Rather I like how completely we have twisted the world with TOTAL BULLSHIT that people feel the need to claim a force for ultimate evil is what makes them want to make the world a fairer, less shitty place.
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Your mental state does explain your political beliefs.
Well, there’ll be a lot less billionaires pretty quickly, from there it’s gonna be a lot of references to star trek, doctor who, dead philosophers and general southernisms.
lol … aliens arrive in 1960s era London police boxes to try to not alarm us as they make first contact
Aliens first message: … I say my good man, it’s quite a coincidence to find you in this part of the galaxy. I feel pecked by a hundred chickens, fuller than a tick on a big dog and fine as frog hair and not half as slick to greet you on this fair morning under god’s blue sky.
… I think I’m in love with you.
Humanity is screwed.
They like being alone, don’t like loud noises, will find a reason to leave a situation with more than 3 people in a small area. They don’t have any sexual desire and will be most happy to go through life without ever having intercourse. Probably going to go extinct without outside intervention thanks to that, better intervene to preserve the species.
They want to hibernate when it’s cold outside. Cold = anything below 70f.
They’re herbivores though so at least they don’t destroy their planet by mass farming the cruelest and most inefficient food source possible. Silver lining?
Excellent source of creating a slave race? … to build that interplanetary space gun to destroy XMH3003 and those stupid Morkahons
Humans only want to masturbate, sleep and play board games. Sounds great
I’m in
Human population is very empathetic, but very kinky.
Aliens: … this one has a bright red ball strapped to their mouth … I suppose it’s a requirement for all of them
I think it’d go great.
I feel like they’d be horrified, and conquer our planet and force us all into therapy, but think they’d see us as worth helping
At one point in my job I was effectively the translator between English speaking Indian software devs, and American project managers. If I can translate technical information into something understandable to a PM, and vague program specs into actionable technical requirements for the devs I think we’d actually be alright with the aliens.
I’m autistic. So they’d be very confused with most people I think
I, for one, would welcome our nuwu owoverlords.
The way the world is going … uwu makes more and more sense every day
There’s a lot of autistic people in this thread
There’s a lot of autistic people on lemmy I think
I’m literally autistic and I can barely even talk to people anymore, so I imagine it’ll be a gigantic disaster.
right but they’re psychic so you can actually communicate at a real rate instead of tripping over your meat trumpet like a fucking animal all the time
Oh okay, so all they’re going to hear about humanity is all the weird math shit I’ve been watching YouTube lectures on lately 😆.
what book is it where they communicate with aliens starting with first principals of mathematics? we might be ok.
But merely being able to communicate with people has never been sufficient to make peace with them, at least from my experience. Otherwise I’d be much more popular with people, because I never had trouble reading, listening to, and writing to people, but I’m not good at talking to people. I typically need a lot more prior information (i.e. cultural norms, dictionary of body language, recent local history, a catalog of an individual’s interests and their definitions, etc.) to talk to people effectively, which I often don’t have or acquire by fucking up enough times to figure it out by hand 🙃.
“Why do these aliens keep making stupid, unfunny jokes”?
Can’t leave the flying saucer without having triple checked it’s locked.
“Hmm, it looks like these humans really like ‘tentacle hentai’… we could use this to our advantage”
Humanity shall receive the gift of estrogen!
I guess we’re good. :)
