back at it with another ridiculous question. As I have been developing my personal ideology, I’ve found that I reject much of the socially progressive ideas in corpo media and twitter (conservatives call it identity politics). Stuff like abolishing the nuclear family (or pride flag on drones joke) that doesn’t look to change any economic or material reality I find I don’t agree with.

First and second wave feminism I support as they changed the material realities for women, but the push for things like gender reassignment surgery under 16 years (i wanted to be in the cia when I was this age, people change personalities quickly during their teenage years) among other socially progressive ideas (bedtime abolition and the like) seem to be far removed from any type of class struggle and even hurt the working class.

Expressing this on Twitter got me called a nazbol (of course) but am I? Does being socially conservative but economically progressive make me a redfash? I understand intersectionality and that you can be trans and poor but focusing so heavily on non class issues seems detrimental for workers, even if they get some progressive tidbits.

plz feel free to own me if I’m spitting straight crap wrote this on my phone b4 work

edit: the thoughtful genzedong comments/commenters make this community the only place I’d be willing to ask a question like this, thanks for that, and the info you share so that myself and others can be better communists 💪🇨🇳👍

  • mylifeforaiur@lemmygrad.ml
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    2 years ago

    abolishing the nuclear family (or pride flag on drones joke) that doesn’t look to change any economic or material reality

    What about the material reality of women stuck in a loveless and abusive relationship? Should they stay so op’s image of nuclear family remains intact? Should gay men pretend to be straight (and therefore be materiality miserable) because op only agrees with nuclear families? How does asking people to play a role that will make them miserable further the cause of the revolution? In fact, I would argue that your position is counter-revolutionary.

    but the push for things like gender reassignment surgery under 16 years

    Whose pushing this? This is a reactionary argument that isn’t based in reality. It’s fine to recognize trans persons while making them wait to be old enough to make permanent decisions about their body.

    • halfie@lemmygrad.mlOP
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      Guess I dont know shit about trans movement with all the crap online but I’d say a woman should have the right to choose their family, and I’ve personally lived a non traditional household (no dad lol) and I can see the difference in me and other young men my age, and having 2 parents (a caretaker and role model, gender doesn’t matter but the roles do) is very helpful in development in my opinion. No one should put up with a shit family women included

      • mylifeforaiur@lemmygrad.ml
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        I’m also from a 1 parent household. Most of the struggles I had after my parents divorced were financial, not social. If housing were guaranteed and school was free, I’m not sure my parents divorce would have mattered at all. For that matter, I’m not even sure if they would have gotten divorced if not for the financial pressures of vulture capitalism.

        Guess I dont know shit about trans movement

        Probably because you don’t know any trans people, or you don’t know that a person in your life is trans. It’s a very small population that isn’t well understood, which is why they make a good target for reactionary hate. Attacking homosexuals doesn’t hit the same way it did 30 years ago, so they’ve moved on to a smaller and more vulnerable minority. Don’t get dragged along by the reactionaries.

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          Yeah I definitely felt the fiscal struggle and it was a big part of my parents divorce as well, but unless my mother did twice the parenting (which I didn’t expect as she was doing twice the work, love ya mum) I probably wouldn’t have made a lot of the stupid decisions I made in my youth.

          • mylifeforaiur@lemmygrad.ml
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            Community mentors could have provided what you needed if that was the priority. As it is, that’s not the priority as everyone is charged with the financial and social well being of only those they are directly related to. We push these units we call “family” into isolated suburban hellholes and we are conditioned to fear everyone from outside the walls of our home. Society did not work this way for much of human history. The privilege of having both your parents survive into even your 30s was something that just didn’t happen before the industrial revolution.

            • halfie@lemmygrad.mlOP
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              True, and a lot of young people are also more dependent on their parents due to late stage capitalism and the development of the suburb🤢

          • GloriousDoubleK@lemmygrad.ml
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            2 years ago

            I come from a divorced family as well.

            So allow me to share my experience. My dad was a well off yet alcoholic and emotionally abusive asshole. My mother was a good hearted Christian god fearing woman. I grew up in a household with two parents until I was about 14.

            Having 2 parents and having them split and one being estranged from me wasnt all that different.

            There are folks who came from single parent families or even gay parents who were more well adjusted than me.

            Having two parents in a nuclear orientation isnt a magick bullet for dodging the traumas of growing up.

            The family I chose is far far closer and greater and more important to me than the so called god given blood relations I was born with.

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        being raised by 2 parents isn’t a silver bullet unfortunately. having 2 abusive parents around didn’t do any good for me. they actually have an okay relationship with each other (they’re still together), they’re just not great at being parents. they’re not cartoonishly evil or anything, but that doesn’t mean that they’re overall good.

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          Yeah a lot of my friends parents are shit but happily married. My mom subconsciously took out a lot of the financial burden on me when I was a kid, hopefully a more just system would help alivieate most of these cases

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        This is a talking point I’ve heard almost word for word, multiple times, from all sorts of reactionaries - young men are struggling because they grow up in single mother households without a strong role model. They really like telling you that your problems can be fixed if we just returned to tradition, but the fact is that having two parents around isn’t a magical trick that generates healthy childhoods, and I know way too many people who grew up in abusive and dysfunctional nuclear families.

        Also, why do you think the caretaker must be something separate from the role model? What is the logic for splitting them up? Can’t one parent, or both, or multiple people in a communal parenting scenario be both caretakers and role models at the same time?

        • halfie@lemmygrad.mlOP
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          I don’t think theyre wrong about the first part but obviously a “return to tradition” is not gonna make families happier or healthier. (Unless we legalize all the meds ppl were hopped up on to cope lol)

          On the care giver/ role model thing and extreme example would be if Mao himself was my father and fighting in the revolution. As his wife is caring for me, I learn about his actions and he becomes a role model. I definitely don’t think just because one parent it automatically makes the other a role model. (pops wasn’t super responsible when he was around so it wouldn’t really have mattered as much in my case)

          Kinda rambly I know but I do see a community parenting situation where one of many caregivers is also role model. Grandparents raising their kids also proves me wrong as they’ve had time to become good role models before they are caregivers, just thought about this while I was replying.

          (Ive also basically changed most of my stance on this stuff after all the counterpoints backed up with evidence in the comments)