So apparently I have a similar contorted expression to my mother when eating sour food.

My father always referred to this as my mother’s-maiden-name-gene. Let’s say her maiden name was Chaplin, he would say “Ah there’s that Chaplin gene again!”

Being young I misunderstood this as a verb, ie. I was “chaplinging”.

Cut to first year of school where I proudly waltz around informing any classmates eating fizzy sweets that the correct and proper term for their reaction is “chaplinging”. It was a few years until the penny dropped.

Never heard them but there’s something vaguely similar in Italian, going “chi non ha testa abbia gambe” literally “who doesn’t have head, have legs” used in various situations like when you go out and forget something (because you didn’t think of it) you gotta use your legs to go back and take it

If you’ve got a dead hooker in the trunk drive the speed limit.

What you lack in memory, your legs suffer.

Where are you from? Over here in southern Germany it is quite common.

Grandma’s empty threat punishment to all my cousins: “I’m gonna jerk a knot in your tail”

When something would strike you with immediate worry, like almost falling off a cliff, real ass-clenching moments, she would say: “That really pulled your pucker string”

Love and miss that woman.

My mom comes from rural Ontario, so I grew up hearing the sort of things you hear on Letterkenny all the time. But I grew up in the city, and I slowly realized that nobody else talks like that

“Let me put my eyes on you,” “I just wanna put eyes on you”: I don’t need anything, but I miss you and would like to visit

“Jimmy legs” : Restless legs

“Hotter than the devils draws (as in underwear) outsides” : It’s hot. No one uses “draws” for underwear anymore I guess, so I’ve started saying “hotter than the devils asshole” but it’s not as “poetic.” (Edit: Realize now it’s “drawers” but it always sounds like “draws” 😂 TIL)

Edit: Forgot one. “Cabbgae story” : When I was a kid, my grandmother told me about the milk man and, for whatever reason, my next question was “and who brings cabbage?” The response was “the cabbage man” which my grandmother explained like it was gospel. When she would bring up something, we started going, “Oh, she’s got a cabbage story.” Now a cabbage story is some old folk’s story. Like, “back when I was a kid, I walked up hill both ways!” would be a cabbage story.

“Everybody’s record starts somewhere.” If you’re considering doing something illegal, is this worth starting your record? (It’s also used to dismiss someone getting into trouble for the right reason.)

I’m realizing that my previous one sets a bad tone for this, but I had hippie uncles, and we were all taught, “We do not cooperate with the police.” Some of us were recently reminiscing about one of my dead uncles and said, “We do not-!” And the rest of us said, “-cooperate with the police!”

All the rest of them are your typical American South sayings.

A few from my grandfather and father which aren’t unique to them but aren’t universal:

1. “red as a smacked ass” or just “smacked ass” - referring to someone who is embarrassed so their face is flushed or generally just a fool
2. “Born on Wednesday looking both ways for the weekend” - someone with a lazy eye
3. “Scissor grinder” - aggravating person, or someone who inserts themselves into other’s business. Ostensibly referring to a person who travels offering sharpening services because they come by unannounced and make a lot of noise in the street.

Related, but not a saying, we had a family tradition at Easter where my grandparents/parents would put all the egg dyes together and dye a final egg a murky brown. That egg was given to the kid with the worst behavior over the last year. It was called the “pissmuckle” egg. There was no discussion after you got it either or any punishment, it was just a censure.

My grandma used to say “drinking coffe standing up brings bad luck”.
While I’m not superstitious, I actually believe that taking the proper time to experience the little daily treats is necessary to get the best out of your day

I have recently heard similar saying with legs, meaning is the smae but different wording roughly translated from Czech:

What is not in the head, is in the legs.

Ketchup effect is good, i might use it when the situation comes. Thanks.

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“The goat man will get you.”

Used as a warning when doing something careless that would invite predators. My great-grandma came to the US from the Czech Republic and told the story of a man who raised goats and would steal children and break into homes at night. It was a reminder to lock your doors and valuables, and to never walk alone in shady neighborhoods.

I wish I could remember how to say it in Czech. It began with “Kuzubah”.

Plenty people in my family refer to cat kneading, in Portuguese, as “dancinha do leite” (milk dance). And I always took it as if it was as universal as “amassar pãozinho” (to knead bread). Well, it isn’t; I discovered this in my adulthood. Apparently it’s from Italian.

There’s also bunch of references to someone making things worse as “batata verde” (green potato); like “xô, vá ser batata verde noutro canto” (shoo, go be a green potato elsewhere) or “[pessoa] é uma batata verde” ([person] is a green potato). I get the reasoning, but no idea where my family got this from.

“Wish in one hand and shit in the other and see which one fills up first.” - Find a way to do it yourself, because it isn’t happening otherwise