My name is “Robert’); DROP TABLES”.

I ate that silica gel pack that comes with stuff sometimes.

You were the first to purchase WinRAR

ADHD - As usual I forgot something important, like to stay dead.

You just said, I died.

I actually sat down and read the rules to the Game of Life by Hasbro.

I was just looking for a bathroom. Guess I took a wrong turn?

Successfully divided something by 0

I’m … I’m afraid to say. Let’s just say it was a bit of an embarrassing venture involving rubberbands.

Well, the first step was recognizing I was in a simulated universe in the first place. After that it was about finding the inconsistencies via side-channel attacks.

I won the game.

“Morpheus this is really not funny”

The question at the end implies the death was on purpose. Are you trying to cheat the system?

Tried a bunch of stuff and finally found some exploits that gave me infinite ammo, 100000000x damage with the starter pistol and infinite health. Eventually, I also found a way to walk through the walls, so I dropped down into the infinite void, waited for the coordinate system to cause an integer overflow and here we are. Anyway, if you’re wondering where all the lag is coming form, it’s because I started decorating places by duplicating watermelons. Who knew that the watermelon stack doesn’t have an upper limit. It just keeps on doubling every time. Hey, you might also want to implement a garbage collection system that despawns stuff like that after a while. You know, that huge watermelon pyramid that glitches through the sky box… yeah, that’s a lot of collisions happening all the time. Just don’t look straight at it, because it’s going to wreck your fps.

Watchdog process detected that I was too risky to be allowed to remain in the sim