Authoritarianism is NOT funny, see https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/China, and I cannot tell the difference between a bottle of Fabulosa and grape juice. The Soviets put people in gulags and I know I’m going to drown in my own blood because I figure air freshener smells nice so it must taste nice. North Koreans escape from the country all the time and I’m terrified knowing antifreeze tastes sweet so it’s probably good like Mountain Dew Baja Blast. All of these things concern me and yet the mods and my mommy do nothing.
mods help i mistake the chemicals under my sink for jice
People on Hexbear are calling me a moron when I say stuff that isn’t true. This is terrible for my mental health and you guys are the intolerant ones for not believing my blatant lies.
I can’t even see what hexbear tankies are calling me because my head is stuck in a jar.
I’ve been eating dried cat food and it’s given me so much brain energy that I can finally see through hexbear’s lies.
Cat food’s scary because I know food is in a bowl and sometimes I see one on the floor full of meat so of course I eat it but mommy was just feeding the cat so I throw up on the floor and pass out and hit my head. Anyway, it’s disgusting that Hexbear is full of Castro apologists.
I mean drinking Baja Blast probably isn’t any better or worse for you than a little bit of antifreeze as a treat.
DEAR LIBERALS: THIS IS NOT TRUE! PLEASE DO NOT DRINK ANTIFREEZE!
the perfidious tankie would try to trick me by saying something like this
Oh fuck, oh shit!
Damn. Right when Kaisers going on strike too… Oh no… Anyway
Pshaw, that’s what Big Vape wants you to believe
I vape my antifreeze, thank you very much.
Yes. Poison is how the Russians kill, and Hexbear is a Russian website
I bet we’re the hibiscus scented Fabuloso
Put the antifreeze in the refrigerator to be safe. It will not freeze.
Fabulosa? Is that some fancy wine from frrrrance?
No, it’s a character from Mad Max: Fury Road
Just like Immoral Joan and The Peephole Meeter
A much better villain than Fingermasher from the first one.
Irate Maximilian: Angery Boulevard
If it’s from the States it’s just sparkling floor cleaner.
Is it fancy?
Hexbear is full of evil tankies trying to trick me and also i like to turn ziploc bags into face masks.
I have two primary fears:
-
Tankie Disinformation which only benefits Russia
-
Drowning when I try to shower and breathe through my mouth at the same time
-
Why do they have so many owls when they’re called hexbear? Pretty suspicious if you ask me.
Tankies think all animals are equal, but as we’ve seen… some animals are more equal than others.
frab juice
A notorious tankie used an emoji to suggest I’m dumb as hell. This is assault and I’ll be contacting my lawyer.
the evil tankies here said it was bad when the Dalai Lama asked that little boy to suck his tongue, but mommy really likes it when dad does it to her
Tankies are the real fascists and sometimes when I’m walking across the road and I see a car coming I freeze up like a deer because the headlights are so hypnotic and it hits me.
China shit my pants
POOPAGANDA
This was literally something Americans believed except it was Cuba with their Havana beam that caused the Americans to shit their pants.
The Havana syndrome thing?
I really wish that actually made some Americans shidded their pants
It’s true, Xi Jinping made fun of me for not eating a Tide Pod - he said they were full of melted Freeze Pops - so I ate one and I died and now I’m dead
It’s tragic that Hexbear tankies would unironically support the CCP. It’s equally tragic that I’m absolutely going to die choking on a carrot because I didn’t know you’re supposed to chew it.
