Hello everyone! Hestia here with a new Megathread! Years ago, before I transitioned and when I was still in college I took an anthropology class. My favorite part of the class was when we were covering different gender customs across the globe and got to make a report on one of them. I can’t remember exactly which one I chose for that project, but what I do remember is a map with different pins scattered on it with various forms of gender-queerness. I decided to track it down and share it with you folks!

https://www.google.com/maps/d/u/0/viewer?ll=8.016975588774075%2C64.4248907814756&z=2&mid=1zDWxhBN5aOofwpE-FkZWQsiFDlE

Edit: you have to open this in a browser, if you’re on a phone it will automatically try to open it in Google maps and won’t bring up the info.

This map provides a brief summary of these genders, but does not go in depth. If you find any you’re interested in, feel free to do some further research and share your findings here. I’ll pin a comment to this post you can attach them. I’m going to share a couple that I found interesting and decided to look further into myself, both of them are non-binary and native american in origin.

The first one I want to talk about is the Winkte, which is a third gender role that was particulatly notable in the Lakota tribe The Winkte are seen as half-men, half-women, and considered sacred. They are typically AMAB and historically have served unique roles in matters of romance and matchmaking and often served as intermediaries for prospecting couples and their families. They also participated in war parties, functioning primarily as witnesses to battle and as doctors to care for the injured. They were also seen as seers, able to forsee paths to victory.

https://www.sdpb.org/blogs/arts-and-culture/the-winkte-and-the-hundred-in-hand/

This next one I’m going to talk about seems mostly local to the Zuni people called the “Lhamana” and I find the Zuni culture to be particularly fascinating, even just doing a cursory glance at it.

Gender roles were well defined in Zuni culture, but the Zuni also valued the concept of a “middle” as it represented stability. This originates from their creation myth, which I won’t go in detail here because I don’t feel qualified to summarize it, but it’s in the link down below.

The Zuni culture is pretty neat and they don’t refer to gender when talking about children. They believed that gender wasn’t an inborn trait but something you acquired as you approached puberty. I wish this was the western approach, but alas.

As children approach puberty they begin to differentiate through different hair styles or clothing choices. AFAB Lhamana would grind corn and make a bowl of stew when they get their first period. There’s probably some cultural significance to this, but I’m not going to do a deep dive on it right now. AMAB Lhamana would start to wear dresses once they hit puberty and start performing women’s work. Both AMAB and AFAB Lhamana were allowed to switch between male and female gender roles as they pleased.

https://owlcation.com/social-sciences/The-Middle-Gender-in-Zuni-Religion

That’s all for now! To wrap thing up I would like to invite yall to our public matrix server! https://matrix.to/#/#tracha:chapo.chat

As a reminder, be sure to properly give content warnings and put sensitive subjects behind proper spoiler tags. It’s for the mental health of not just your comrades, but yourself as well.

Here is a screenshot of where to find the spoiler button.

  • SuperZutsuki [they/them]@hexbear.net
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    1 hour ago

    Anti-recommendation for shoes sold by Aphixta on aliexpress. They’re very poorly made all over but most importantly the heels are wobbly and seem likely to break easily.

  • BountifulEggnog [she/her]@hexbear.net
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    2 minutes ago
    spoiler
    self harm, si

    >accidentally cut myself shaving
    >feels amazing
    >it stops hurting
    >feel like shit again

    There’s no way out. My issues are inescapable. Lately self harm and suicide are the main things on my mind. Its hopeless. Actually doing it will suck though. Wish I could just die in my sleep instead. Guess its fitting for the end of my life to suck too.

    Not much to say I guess. Everything is hopeless and I want it to be over.

    If only I was born right. But no, I was born broken and wrong. Punished for having bad genes ig.

  • yewler [she/her]@hexbear.net
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    2 hours ago

    Uhhhhhhhhh I’m going thrifting with a couple of friends in 20 mins and one of those friends offered to help me with my hair and also I finally heard back from the place I was trying to get HRT at and they’re calling me later this week to officially get me on the schedule.

    It’s a good day in gender town

    • Moss [they/them]@hexbear.net
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      1 hour ago

      Having no butt is fortunately the most solvable body issue, besides like changing your hairstyle. A fat butt isn’t born, it’s built

      spoiler

      Also let the record state that small butts are sexy

    • LocalOaf [they/them, ze/hir]@hexbear.net
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      2 hours ago

      butt

      unsolicited gymrat advice

      Hip thrusts with alternating heavy low rep sets and high rep low weight sets, like a 3/6 heavy, 3/20 light blend

      Seated hip ab/adduction cable weight machine, same blend of heavy+low volume/light+high volume

      Bulgarian split squats with opposite side loading with a kettlebell, lighter working weight with more sets and reps and slower concentric lift focusing on form and getting some hip activation

      Alternating leg lunges with a farmer’s carry with dumbbells or kettlebells (can substitute with leg press and leg curls/extensions on machines if your knees don’t like those, same with the split squats)

      Donkey kicks with an ankle cuff on a cable weight station, either on the floor on a mat or standing ones if you have access to a dedicated machine like this (my gym has one of these and it quite literally whips ass imho)

      Cossack squats, lateral lunges or pistol/shrimp/dragon squats if you’re fancy and really good at bodyweight stuff and have good balance and RoM

      For your butt! professor-helper-wave

      (I also have disappointing butt genetics but I’m working my ass, uh, on? It’s frustratingly slow but I’m making some gains)

  • Carcharodonna [she/her]@hexbear.netM
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    4 hours ago

    So I was a little worried that I wouldn’t actually be happy after moving and that it was all just my own brainworms that I’d never be able to get rid of…

    I was wrong. I’m actually feeling genuinely happier about life and at least somewhat hopeful about the future. I like the new job, new location is better than I imagined, and I’m making plans to start socializing IRL for the first time in ages. Everything seems to be going well and it kind of scares me a little, but I can’t go through life just being worried all the time I suppose.

    Also makes me happy that people are posting cute stuff in /c/cute :D I honestly wasn’t sure people would be into it but at least some are. I need to keep finding new cute stuff to post to keep the cute train moving forward though.

  • yewler [she/her]@hexbear.net
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    5 hours ago

    I stood up for myself and my gender for the first time today. A friend kept degendering me and I asked him not to.

    Kind of a small thing but I feel proud of myself since I’ve always had a poor self esteem

  • ashinadash [she/her]@hexbear.net
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    4 hours ago
    LIFTING UPDATE

    So I am STILL not lifting yet, it’s been like a month. I stopped taking tramadol and like I wanna get back, but Idk if it will make it better. What if without the pain receptors being numbed, it’ll just hurt and be excruciating and I die? What if I rot instead???

    I like that my chronic pain/fatigue is maybe stopping me from doing the thing that could make my chronic pain/fatigue less bad.

    catgirl-cry I am never going to be the beautiful muscledyke… tfw not athletic…

    In other news I have the most creeping feeling that Fallow isn’t a one-run game and that stuff changes, more than just the sealed door, if you play it again. I’ll have to go back and puzzle over it. Give it more kisses, my beloved.

  • Josephine_Spiro [she/her]@hexbear.net
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    5 hours ago

    Feel like I need to stop using this site because I need IRL friends since I’m very lonley, but all the queer groups in my area are full of radlibs and Zionists :( Like its unhealthy to have my main form of social interaction outside of my job be this website, but there is very few people who will click with my interests and queerness

    • SadArtemis [she/her]@hexbear.net
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      1 hour ago

      Definitely requires getting into some decent circles that have zero tolerance for radlibs and Zionism and generally aren’t online, IKTF.

      Recently booted a ex-friend (had been mild befriending for a bit, they increasingly were showing their true colors particularly re Zionism as it came up but in hindsight just not gonna have any tolerance for such takes anymore) for exactly such reasons, and I’d met them at a queer space (in that same space seen self-hating/mentally colonized hanjian, people playing a clip of some US talk show host laughing off that strike quite a while back on Syrian officers’ academy graduation and family gathering events, etc). Honestly don’t want to reach out in such spaces anymore when there are infinitely better ones (like my partner’s friend circles and people online, or my siblings etc. or even what neighbors I’ve talked to due to mostly being POC).

    • ashinadash [she/her]@hexbear.net
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      4 hours ago

      its unhealthy to have my main form of social interaction outside of my job be this website,

      Universally or personally speaking? 'Cause I ended up in your situation, for so many reasons.

    • rtstragedy [fae/faer, she/her]@hexbear.net
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      4 hours ago

      maybe this is weird of me, but i kinda see bearsite as a means to an end these days; I see it as a place to find people with my interests and who i like talking to, and hopefully I can build something deeper with them. I also find tracha a little overwhelming so i don’t chat too much, but I do like me some small groups or 1-on-1 things.

      • SadArtemis [she/her]@hexbear.net
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        1 hour ago

        This also 10000%. Hexbear and the grad, apart from shitposting and once in a while effortposting (etc) are more like a who’s who/yellow pages/repository of people and activities that are not ghouls in one form or another and are generally pretty cool ish (even if we might not always vibe)

      • Josephine_Spiro [she/her]@hexbear.net
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        4 hours ago

        I joined it briefly when it came out but the volume of messages was too much for me, as I was either feeling like I was missing out on something, or I would be flooded with notifications. Thanks for the recommendation though

  • AshenWolf [she/her, they/them]@hexbear.netM
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    6 hours ago

    I got gendered correctly today. Had someone calling out “sir, sir”, trying to ask me for directions. I turn to face them, and they look confused. “Sir, Ma’am, I can’t tell with the mask on”. I took my shot, put on my best fem voice. I had mastered the talk-no-jutsu, my voice training was about to pay off. I looked at the person, and proceeded to ignore most of the training, just changing pitch and speaking more softly. It still worked, I got called ma’am. They later apologized for getting it wrong, and I just said no worries. No eyebows. No stare. No disgust.

    I’ve done it, I’ve won :keikaku:

    • ashinadash [she/her]@hexbear.net
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      4 hours ago

      Just according to keikaku dont-laugh

      It is fuckin awesome when you can slack and still get gendered correctly, which for me came with time, feels great tbh…