Helping others to do their best, especially when it’s something they are truly passionate about.
What if the thing they’re passionate about is doing evil murders?
Hear that everybody? This guys an accessory to murder!
Username checks out
If any comment from this section was going to get me the “username checks out” I thought it would be the one I made for “Cheesy McSneezer, and the Cheesy McSneezer 7”
I hadn’t scrolled that far down yet lol
Doesn’t mean he has to help. Just good at it when he chooses it
Some say the world would be poorer without Charles Manson. Not me - some.
Generating world peace.
The world would become a better place, and no one would be able to trace it back to me. I get to live in a warless world and still have my privacy.
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Jesus made sure EVERYONE knew
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Ah yes… My favorite gospel
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In spirit, maybe. :-)
I feel like you could game this… my superpower would be making a hit album in a day. I’ll just tell them it took several weeks. Replace album with day trading, writing a comedy set, movie, engineering designs, theoretical physics…
Game this is easy: I will be the best at commiting crimes without getting caught. In your face Moriarty
I was going to say “robbing banks” but I prefer the generality in your answer.
Cracking DRM. Win-win.
Judging from some of the prolific ones out there, cracking DRM requires you to also be absolutely batshit insane.
computer programmer
Time to contribute great code to tons of open source projects, completely anonymously of course.
exactly
CRANKIN’ MY HOG AROOOO!!!
I love that THE_PACK memes are leaking into Lemmy. WE MADE IT BOIS!!!
THAT’S CUZ THE PACK NEVER LEAVES A BROTHER BEHIND AROOOOOOOOOOOO!!!1!
Theft.
Nobody’s claimed stock investing yet, I’ll take that one.
Making people laugh. They’ll keep thinking there’s someone funnier but they’ll be wrong.
Embezzling money
Being a spy. Did I crack the code??
Not really. Spies need a handler. If no one can know then you can’t tell anyone the secrets so you’re a terrible spy.
Schrodingers spy.
Can’t know I’m the best, can still think I’m a half decent spy yknow
Can it be murder? I’d fix the world with violence if I could get away with it.
You’ve seen Death Note right?
If anything “Using violence to fix the world” would be the better thing to be good at since it protects you from the Monkey Paw to a certain extent. Exceptions:
- a “fixed” world being one devoid of humans
- a “fixed” world panning out in the opposite way you imagined (everyone is equally miserable instead of happy for example)
Everyone being equally miserable could be preferable to some people being happy, since it gives everybody equal reasons to work towards improving the situation… Except, of course, the monkey paw would ensure that wouldn’t pan out
you could kill trump and some other corrupt politicians and world leaders and world would be a better place
Monkey Paw: Trump and other corrupt politicians being high up the authority chain made sure more evil politicians didn’t get authority.
So you kill those as well. Now trust in democracy is crumbling because for some reason a lot of politicians keep mysteriously dying. “Good” politicians enact laws to protect their lives but those laws are bad as well so now you also have to off the good politicians. I hope you see where this hypothetical is going. The world is not so simple that a few well placed assassinations would fix everything, if that were the case it’d have been done before.
Keeping secrets
Give me something like physics. I’m just damn curious about how clouds form, or how ants can’t be the size of elephants. Back when I took physics courses I felt like I had a better fundamental understanding of the world.
Nowadays I’m busy going in another direction, but a cozy Wikipedia article is always fun to read from time to time.
Being famous, in order to create a paradox.
It doesn’t create a paradox. It just creates the same situation I’ve been thinking about for 30 years.
If I had any musical talant, I would be “Cheesy McSneezer” and my band would be “Cheesy McSneezer and the Cheesy McSneezer 7”. It’s a death metal jazz lounge band. They create all original music, but nobody knows who Cheesy McSneezer is. You hear him on all the albums, but every time you go to the concerts, the band tells you “Sorry guys, I know you came out for a great show, but Cheesy McSneezer couldn’t be here tonight. So instead, please welcome our one night only temporary lead vocals…(Insert any random well known musician here)”
And every show, the reason why Cheesy couldn’t make it changes, and is always completely absurd. And every album cover is like 100,000 people all coming together for a photo shoot. Somewhere in the photo, Cheesy McSneezer is always on the album art…but it’s never aparent which one he is. And the photos are taken from so far away that you really don’t have any up close visuals to cross reference the other photos with.
So every concert, is technically a famous musician doing cover songs for a guy that nobody knows who he is, but also everybody knows who he is.
If you haven’t seen the movie Frank (2014) I’d recommend it
Based on a true story, unbelievably
Basically Buckethead.
