• lady_maria@lemmy.world
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    9 months ago

    I will never understand why any gay person would ever be transphobic.

    Like…??? You do understand that people have used many of the exact same arguments against trans rights as they’ve done to suppress gay rights too… right?

    • Stamets@lemmy.worldOPM
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      9 months ago

      Same way so many gay people are racist too or that you have so many classist or ableist gays. People just often don’t care about what doesn’t affect them. Hypocrisy is common as hell in humanity. We’re all guilty of it to some extent, usually though it’s very minor and in the background. But whether it’s big or small people often ignore their own hypocrisies. This shit is just blatant in the gay community. I think they do have the self-awareness of realizing the same arguments are used against them. They just don’t care.

      • CleoTheWizard@lemmy.world
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        8 months ago

        Not to justify any of it, but this is very much the thoughts of past generations. We complain about these ideals but this has always been the prevailing thought until very recently.

        I’m not saying there’s zero examples of communities bridging, it was a long way to get where we are. But I’d say it’s only in the last 10, maybe even 5 years that I’ve seen communities begin to finally work together on collective equalities.

        To everyone that does not understand this fully, myself included, the main point I’ve been told is that each groups struggle was entirely separate. When you’re a minority, you’re not about to take up the baggage and arguments used against other groups. And then you turn on other minority groups to divert attention or because again, their struggle isn’t your problem.

        None of this is right or helpful. I say this only because many of our groups are gaining in privileges compared to others. This IS THE TIME to elevate everyone instead of running away with it and diminishing others.

        • lady_maria@lemmy.world
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          8 months ago

          Yeah, it can be easy to forget how much public opinion has changed for the better within the last couple of decades because of how bleak everything feels right now. It’s probably important to remember that.

          I say this only because many of our groups are gaining in privileges compared to others. This IS THE TIME to elevate everyone instead of running away with it and diminishing others.

          Absolutely. Too many people ignore the fact that the systemic struggles of all oppressed groups are tied to everyone else’s, if only because they’re all perpetuated by the same systems and mindsets.

          They’re focusing their attention on the wrong people and things, but I guess feeling superior to others makes them feel better about their own struggles and privileges.

          (Also… love your PFP! I adored the Sly games as a kid!!!)

    • TwoBeeSan@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      Bisexual bias from an ex boyfriend of mine. Believed I would leave him for a girl constantly.

      Same idea.

      Guy was tranphobic too because it finally gave him a chance to be a bully instead of the bullied.

      Fucking sociopaths

      • flying_sheep
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        8 months ago

        I hope you left him for a girl. Not because that makes him right but because fuck him.

    • Yrt@feddit.de
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      8 months ago

      Oh no, for some of them it’s totally different. Also there is a lot of homophobia inside the homosexual circles. Couldn’t believe it myself, but sometimes if you don’t look or act like the cliche or like common homosexual stuff like music or movies, you’re an imposter and not really gay. Saw it happen myself at a lesbian party. Two girls just looking female were bullied cause it’s “not lesbian” for a couple to be both female looking, that’s just two best friends being confused. “It’s just a phase” is a thing I heard quite a lot that evening. Never knew you signed up for a membership with rules and stuff when you’re “entering” the LG area. Just thought if you only like women as a woman you’re lesbian and same for men only liking men, but it seems that’s not the case.

      • lady_maria@lemmy.world
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        8 months ago

        Yeah… ugh. I know there’s a lot of biphobia (and, as OP mentioned, racism/ableism/classism) in the community, too, which is equally fucking absurd. I guess being queer doesn’t necessarily mean you’re any less of an ignorant asshole.

    • andros_rex@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      Transphobic gay men are sadly common. I think some of them think that getting rid of us will make it easier for them to be accepted.

      There’s a lot of gross and uncomfortable discourse about the way cis gay men treat trans gay men as well. My boyfriend and I were talking about some nasty shit that went down on Survivor…

    • Meron35@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      The same reason why women can be misogynistic. They think they’re one of the “good ones” and #notlikeothergays

    • Mango@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      Similar counterarguments makes for a strawman fallacy. An argument for one case can have different results than for another because it is something different.

  • fidodo@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    These cowards need to finish the fucking sentence. "don’t agree"with what exactly? Their right to exist?

    • Ashe@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      8 months ago

      Someone I have to interact with tries to pull this double speak and it’s not only infuriating, but so uncomfortable and unsettling.

      I’m not saying that I don’t believe that you can’t change your gender… But if someone said that it wasn’t possible that would make them transphobic? I just feel like you look to be validated whereas I don’t care if people know that I’m gay/bisexual.

      That’s kinda how it works!!! I’m trans and would like to be gendered correctly! (Something he struggles with also). I’ve been bad about voice training, but I don’t get misgendered in public, so I’d say the unfortunately public process of transitioning has a validation component to it.

      These fucks try to use double speak to absolve themselves of any accountability while “just asking questions”. Ugh

  • stinerman [Ohio]@midwest.social
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    8 months ago

    It’s amazing how people in general can have no empathy for who are discriminated against even if they themselves were discriminated against.

    • TwoBeeSan@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      The dissonance is uniquely human. For some reason certain people will never see themselves in others no matter how bad society has shit upon them in the past.

  • 🦄🦄🦄@feddit.de
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    8 months ago

    Tbf I also sometimes disagree with trans people. For example my cute friend told me that red is not my color and she is so wrong about that? Like??

  • drmeanfeel@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    The smug “stay home with MY BOYFRIEND WHO IS A BOY AND I AM A BOY” after already saying he’s gay was a real cherry on top

      • drmeanfeel@lemmy.world
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        8 months ago

        Goes to a different gay school for gays, we’re gay together you see. ::laughs:: you just lost the GAYEST ally imaginable, trans people!

  • gmtom@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    Literally just replace “trans” with any other queer identity and see how that sound you bozo.

      • barsoap@lemm.ee
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        8 months ago

        *puts on blue wig* No but you see bis are just indecisive and you can’t know whether you’re ace before you’ve tried and once you’ve tried you’ve had sex and can’t be ace so they don’t exist anyway. Also it’s only pan if you’re from Greece if you’re from Italy and call yourself pan instead of bi that’s colonialism.

    • Syndic@feddit.de
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      8 months ago

      Well it’s likely that such a fuckwad, does have his issues with Bi people as well.

      • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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        8 months ago

        Hell I wouldn’t even be surprised if he’s uncomfortable with lesbians. I’ve found many who are like that define their acceptance of other queer people on how much they feel they’re similar.

  • Jo Miran
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    9 months ago

    I’m pretty sure he implied that “getting fucked” was his backup plan. Also, that guy can go eat shit.

    • stoly@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      I also thought of that. Basically upper middle class gays and lesbians got to live in peace in NYC and immediately abandoned the rest of the community.

  • 7heo
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    8 months ago

    […] I’m just gonna have to stay at home with my boyfriend.

    […] get fucked.

  • blady_blah@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    This kind of feels like the “why aren’t you inclusive of my racism?” argument conservatives have used against liberals. “I thought you were supportive of different viewpoints?!”

  • Drivebyhaiku@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    Ingratitude is one of the most subtly commonplace toxic things to exist. I see so many gay folks be terrible to trans people and lesbians without any knowledge of how historically important those groups were to their own liberation. So many folks just want a big fun uncomplicated party with rainbows where they feel centered without realizing the intent of the original Pride. OG Pride was modeled after an Independence day parade. If our founding event was Stonewall we would honor those who fought like heroes and live out loud where everyone could see and made it so our issues could not be so easily swept under the rug ever again. Trans people of color have always been right at the heart of Pride. Trans people in general were key in fighting for marriage equality because it was our fight too due to the ban creating final impenetrable barriers to acceptance of our legal documentation.

    Yeah, if you “don’t agree with trans people” then you can stay home and wave your rainbow flag alone because you sure as hell aren’t celebrating Pride.

  • lath@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    Humans are very limited creatures. Our mental faculties are easily compromised. Our breadth of knowledge is full of glaring gaps. We can speak the same language and still fail to understand each other. We don’t know the same things. We don’t understand the same things. Our similarity is that we are lacking. Our difference is the topics we lack in.

    So if you can’t understand how someone can do something silly, try to remember of all the times you did something silly. Then say “Ohh, it’s like that, but with something else.”

    • TankovayaDiviziya@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      As a child, I pondered if I am the seeing colour red the same way as others. Now as an adult, realised that it goes beyond more than that. We live in a different set of reality because our own individual minds process the world different from one another. Not only that, different places are their own niche environment. Even if two groups of people live within the same nation, their environment are still different from each other. It is still an ecosystem but with subset environments. An economically deprived inner city is a microenvironment as is an affluent suburb. Both inhabitants would act, think and behave differently from one another.

      But despite differences, I still think humans will always find a way to find common ground and shared feelings. At the end of the day, we still find harmony even after the most violent in-fighting. Each of us follow the universal golden rule regardless of race, religion, gender etc.

      • Humana@lemmy.world
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        8 months ago

        Look no further than your siblings. Nobody is closer to you in both genetics nor background, yet the differences in perspective and values can be huge. In my family incidents from 20+ years ago are hotly contested even though we were all there nobody can agree on who took what part or what the motives and consequences were.