onoira [they/them]

  • 5 Posts
  • 78 Comments
Joined 10 months ago
Cake day: January 14th, 2024
  • onoira [they/them]@lemmy.dbzer0.comtoneurodiverse@hexbear.net•is your voice offensive to other peopleEnglish
    9·
    23 hours ago

    i either speak too loudly or too quietly. i overenunciate everything, and have a vaguely General American accent when i speak English, so if i’m too loud then people conflate me with an amerikkkan tourist and sometimes get violent with me (i’m not a turtle ilander). neurotypicals from the southern and midwest US accuse me of ‘pretending i’m better than’ them; native speakers of other languages i speak similarly get defensive because i usually adopt a ‘standard’ ‘prestige’ dialect. bonus: i’m femme-passing, so being loud irritates cismen.

    on top of it all, people tell me i’m pretentious because i use bIg wOrD and speak directly without any of the timewasting niceties and pleasantries of ‘normal’ speech, and — being a language nerd — i am very selective with my word choice, i use very narrow definitions of words (i hated the concept of ‘synonyms’ in school), and i like to use obscure/archaic terms where i think they fill an unfulfilled niche in my vocabulary… i sometimes sound like a tortured poet. i have trouble understanding spoken language, i lose my words a lot, and i get into stuttering fits. people (read: bullies) consider these great opportunities to mock the ‘snobby’ way that i speak. if i get started on a topic, i find it hard to notice when to shut the fuck up.

    when i’m upset, my voice betrays my emotions. if i’m trying to deëscalate a situation or engage in nonviolent communication then i get accused of being manipulative.

    all of this compounds to frustrate people’s worldviews, since they find it hard to believe i didn’t have a formal education and grew up in poverty, or that i struggle with mental health and neurological issues. so i also get accused of being a liar. and a manipulator. a lot.

    these days i force almost everyone i talk to to only ever speak to me via IM or email (hOw maNipuLaTivE and DEMANDING), and i just avoid associating with neurotypicals as much as i can. no, it doesn’t make social functioning easier, but i don’t think it can be any easier.

    *shruggie*

  • onoira [they/them]@lemmy.dbzer0.comtodatahoarder•Archival in a fascist regimeEnglish
    114·
    11 days ago

    seconding a focus on sexology; we don’t need another Institut für Sexualwissenschaft incident.

    off the top of my head:

    • The History of Sexuality (Michel Foucault 1976 – 84 + 2018)
    • Transgender Warriors (Leslie Feinberg 1998)
    • Gender Trouble (Judith Butler 1990)
    • Undoing Gender (Judith Butler 2004)
    • Caliban and the Witch (Silvia Federici 2004)
    • Black on Both Sides (C. Riley Snorton 2017)
    • The Stonewall Riots (Marc Stein 2019)

    including all the works of Judith Butler and Silvia Federici.

    more academically:

    • Kinsey Reports; The Kinsey Institute: The First Seventy Years; and any other expansions on the work of the Kinsey Institute
    • Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Healthcare: A Clinical Guide to Preventive, Primary, and Specialist Care (Kristen Eckstrand, Jesse M. Ehrenfeld 2016)

    you can probably farm the bibilographies on these.