Owie

I need to just start reading everything I read out loud in my voice. Hardest part is I am just not satisfied with any voice I can do

Yeah I don’t get the “am I doing this for attention” type thoughts anymore. It’s more like, Im just scared that I’m all wrong about myself because like no one sees it, no one expected it… And like whenever I say my chosen name people just give me this look like yeah whatever you say. Some people will even double take and be like seriously? And then bro me.

Internally I feel like me, and I feel like I’m pretty feminine but when no one sees that from the outside Its like really hard to take myself seriously or take seriously my thoughts and feelings. I really just want to be taken seriously by wider society and I’m just not… I am forced to boy mode at work as a result because I don’t think people would take me seriously if I came out and that’s also slowly driving me to crazy

I need to just get a strong internal sense of gender. It’s kinda hard when no one sees me :/

The reason why IPL won’t work on the face is that it just doesn’t have enough power to kill the follicles. For AMAB people hair follicles in the face are deeply rooted and strong in a way that is not the case in other parts of the body

Laser and IPL both cause permanent hair loss but just note you have a lot of hair in different cycles so this takes a while.ipl is much lower power so you’re also not going to kill as many but you will definitely thin the hair out significantly. Like my leg hair takes a while to grow back and I only shave like every once in a while now. For body IPL should suffice though… imo.

Laser yeah I think it’s pretty permanent but it’s not going to get everything. You’ll have to finish up with electrolysis. Unfortunately this whole thing is a multi year process though you’ll start seeing results somewhat quickly.

Re:covid I think you’ll easily be able to request they wear a mask. They should also be sanitizing the decises like between customers. What other actions do you want them to do to be covid safe?

It’s pride month which means straights come to the gay bars 🙃

Lots of straight people at the lesbian bar… just got asked by some dude if I was in line for the men’s room. Very cool

Yeah my experience was pretty tough I would say, when I was going through it. But I’m out on the other side now and it’s honestly fine and I completely forgive her (and I myself have apologized for any wrongs I did through that time) and I think we’re in a good place.

Honestly yeah it really fucked with my head that absolutely no one saw it at all. Nobody even saw any queerness in me. Still this happens when I come out to people and it’s like my number one reason why I absolutely hate coming out. I just want people to be like “oh yeah I saw that it makes sense” but that literally never happens and it kinda makes me crazy

Oh God this is kinda shit advice but I just try to ignore them. Also the more time I spend with my friends who are affirming and in affirming spaces that feeling gets less loud over time.

I will say though I’ve been mostly out socially for like 9 months now. The feeling definitely gets quieter the longer you’re our and also the better your style gets.

I mean, transition is indeed a process, but also I don’t think you should focus on how hard it would be to detransition if you’re wrong or something. Focus on figuring out what you actually like, try different things, try hormones if you want (you can stop before 3 months with basically no permanent changes).

For me, I did a partial social transition before I got on E for my own reasons. But also, it’s really hard. That being said it does build up your skin for it though lol.

I guess, I’d say if you’re unsure, just do some exploration. Nails, plushies, grooming, clothes, wigs (if you want), breast forms, all sorts of things. If you’re in a city there is probably some support group around? Check your local lgbt center if you have one.

Hormones can come later if you want. But that absolute, 100% knowledge that I’m trans didn’t come for me and I think never would come for me without just trying hormones. Even still idk it’s weird. I’m pretty damn sure but also dysphoria is a removed and always has me second guessing.

It’s ok. It is what it is, and honestly we’ve been more so becoming friends again which is so nice. She is straight though lol.

Yeah, there are a few different ages that I think people tend to come out at and we fall into different categories because we all have similar reasons why we “lasted” so long.

For me, I’m bi and I’ve known I was queer for a while. But overall I was quite straight presenting. Nobody would even guess that I was anything besides cishet - literally I haven’t gotten one person who’s like “Oh wow… This makes sense” to me.

But yeah, being straight presenting stops many of us from coming to terms with queerness I think especially trans ness. Being straight presenting is like, such a privilege. People just understand your deal, and nobody bars an eye. So much easier. It’s hard to give it up.

And then of course, with our age group, being trans wasn’t really… A thing that I knew about until I was older. Like, I hadn’t even met a trans person until late into college and I didn’t understand at the time. Absolutely no visibility. Hell, for us, most of our lives gay marriage was illegal in the first place! Really crazy.

So yeah don’t beat yourslrf up (idk if you are, but if you are, don’t). We have so much stacked against us and you’re here now :)

I started transition right before my 30th birthday. I would say the hardest parts for me have been the

-“am I just a man wearing a dress” thoughts -dealing with coming out at an older age. People expect me to have this all well and figured out by now. -dealing with my entire life changing when I was just getting “started” e.g. my engagement ended as a result. -honestly maybe the worst is feeling like I missed my 20s on some level. Or even more than that, feeling like I missed out on being the girl I always wanted to be. And now I just feel like some in between thing that can’t help but be perceived as a man.

I think a lot of us older trans folks though don’t identify with the strong “I was a girl in a boy body” trope. For me it was always just that I wanted to be a girl, but didn’t realize that that was an option so I just ignored it and was actually quite good at being a guy.

Actually the fact that I was good at being a guy sorta kept my egg from cracking for a while too. It really felt I had so much to lose.

Same. I got upside down triangle body and it still looks p good on me. Way better than low waist pants

I do a lot of that style mostly with pants

What the hell isn’t the whole point of Bitcoin that it is a currency (it’s not)

❤️

Health anxiety peaking for sure. I have convinced myself I have cancer.

Cw Discussion of medical issues, genitals

Really they will. If you happen to live in California lmk, we can get things like FFS covered through insurance which is a game changer. Same with laser hair removal and ofc hrt and stuff

Yes this happened to me for sure. Spikes come and go though

I’ve definitely been there.