Married het cis male. Wife is absolutely bent out of shape due to our states bull shit abortion ban and with Trump being in office again. We had been talking about a second kiddo… But she told me that she wanted me to get a vasectomy Monday morning at 8am. She’s not leaving her life in the hands of old dudes.
So… I’m going to schedule it for inauguration day .
Other than that… okay. Tho… I did buy another carry gun. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Edit: voted Dem all the way down ballot.
voted Dem all the way down ballot.
As if you even need to say this when you began with proper use of cis and het
Haha that’s fair
Contrarian take: being so ostentatious in the “proper” use of such terms is one reason that Democrats just lost and that the rest of us outside America will now have to suck up yet more of Trump.
As if people stopped saying cis het would somehow reduce bigotry.
It is impenetrable jargon. Inadvertently or otherwise, it is being used by the enlightened few as a stick with which to beat the (supposed) ignorant bigoted masses. A lot of people find this deeply annoying and objectionable. Addendum: To be clear, that includes me and I am not “cis het”.
It is impenetrable jargon
Lol, what are you, illiterate?
Cisgender and heterosexual are really simple to understand, basically every American learns the second term in science class for fucks sake
And with TRANSgender rights in the media for 10 years now only an idiot wouldn’t be able to at least make a good guess on what CISgender might mean
Maybe what they are trying to say is that most everyday folks don’t use those terms in any normal conversation. I’ve never used those terms myself and haven’t heard them in any conversation I can recall outside of the Internet.
Maybe what they are trying to say is that most everyday folks don’t use those terms in any normal conversation
Then say that and not that they’re “impenetrable jargon”, because saying what they said makes you come across as so stupid it’s unbelievable and wraps around to “too obvious”
I’ve never used those terms myself and haven’t heard them in any conversation I can recall outside of the Internet.
Yeah, because they’re not actually all that relevant to normal life, but online it’s far easier and simpler to put them out there so people can properly address you in the anonymous internet. Also being put into games and shit for representation, which is likely included in what the person was whinging about
If you tell Americans outside cosmopolitan cities they must declare themselves publicly as “cis het” or else they’re a bigot (I caricature but only slightly), then you should expect to lose elections.
And American elections tend to affect other people in the world. That’s why lots of us wish you would let up a bit on this nonsense.
If you tell Americans outside cosmopolitan cities they must declare themselves publicly as “cis het” or else they’re a bigot
Nothing even close to that is happening and you’d have to be willfully ignorant to pretend otherwise
So long as it isn’t attempting to refurbish words that are still in common use and already have common meanings, I usually have no issue with new-speak. Unnecessary abbreviations are taxing, though cis and het have become ubiquitous enough that I can almost forgive it.
Agreed. Much better to introduce new jargon than to insidiously repurpose existing language. This is the point Orwell made.
But it’s jargon nonetheless. It’s exclusionary by definition.
I dunno. Online, it feels less like jargon and more like an attempt at avoiding any snark. Irl, I occasionally hear “cis” but most people say “straight” or rather than “het.” Just another synonym to memorize for me
Is that you, Sam Harris?
“Ostentatious”? Must be a Democrat.
Ah man, I should buy a gun.
Go far enough left… You get your guns back.
Liberal gun owners sub on reddit used to be decent.
I’ve never been against self defense personally, but never felt I needed one previously.
Crossbows come equipped with Hollywood style “silencers.”
Apparently there’s a thing called “linear compensators” which are essentially almost as effective as silencers (when used with subsonic ammo), but don’t require a tax stamp? Someone with more firearms knowledge than I can surely share more details on that. But I came across the things recently and found it rather curious.
Literally just bought a gun safe. Plan on getting a shotgun in the next month for black Friday. Gotta protect yourself.
I’ve been eyeing a DP12. Probably complete overkill but at the same time, if someone comes knocking down my door then I want to be able to erase them with extreme prejudice if I have to.
Do not buy that thing. It’s utter junk. If you are wanting a home defense rifle build an AR pistol.
Aside from being a bullpup and the clumsiness of trying to load two independent tube mags, what’s wrong with it? I’m not expecting to storm a fortified position; I’m only expecting to use it for self-defense and I highly doubt I’d need to go through both mags in such a situation (if so then I’d probably be fucked either way) so reloading shouldn’t be a problem. Bullpup is bullpup *shrug*. The other option is some form of semi-auto shotgun like a Saiga-12 that I can buy a drum mag for.
I’m not really interested in a rifle or pistol. Not really interested in something that can penetrate multiple walls and potentially end up in my neighbor’s neighbor’s wall. If I end up actually getting organized with a group then that’d change, but my modus operandi right now is to put my head down until I’m in a more secure environment; which means basically a shotgun because that seems like the ideal self-defense weapon for a home environment.
These types of shotguns are jamfests, which is the last thing you want in a life or death situation.
Over penetration is going to happen no matter what you’re shooting, drywall won’t stop shit.
The reason I suggested an AR is you’re going to have better target acquisition and the odds of actually hitting someone are greater than if you have a handgun or a huge shotgun.
As always, practice practice practice.
Alright, thanks for the info.
So… I’m going to schedule it for inauguration day .
Go get it Monday if you aren’t opposed to it. No reason to wait and risk pregnancy being a couple weeks along on inauguration day.
Pretty shit. Came out of the closet as trans to my parents just before the election after hiding dysphoria for nearly 20yrs (I’m 30). Unfortunately, the dysphoria has been intense enough that I’m so dissociated that I can barely function, so as you might imagine, I’m currently living with parents.
My dad’s reaction was basically, “whoever the best you is, be that you”.
My mom’s reaction was “but you’re my son… I always wanted to have a brother and you’re kinda like that”.
Meanwhile my grandparents voted for Trump after saying they wouldn’t, and are now crying about it. Literally. My grandmother was in tears.
So my mom is also dealing with that, and possibly osteoporosis, which meant she said, “it’s gonna take time to process this”.
Then last night she told me that I wasn’t allowed to start hrt until I moved out.
She refuses to let me tell her why I can barely function. She refuses to let me describe what I’m going through. She says she “can’t handle it”, that “it’s not a top priority right now”, that she’s “trying to understand” why I’ve made this “choice” while also telling me things like “but I like you the way you are” and rejecting any information I send to her because she’d rather consult her friends that she “trusts more”.
She starts to have a panic attack whenever I try to talk to her about it and God forbid I tell her that she made a mistake because then I obviously hate her guts and want her to die. She’s literally accused me of that.
It hurts like hell but I don’t know how to get out of this situation. I don’t know how long it’ll take hrt and therapy to get me on my feet all while not having a job. All this while in Texas. I’m fucking scared.
Edit: I also kinda wonder if I was born intersex and that’s why my mom is freaking out. I’d think my dad would know and would say something, but idk. I’ve heard of times where one parent had an intersex kid “”“fixed”“” without the other parent knowing. It honestly might explain some shit if I was born intersex.
That’s horrible that you’re having to go through that. I honesty can’t imagine. But from one “Feathers” to another, that took a hell of a lot of courage.
I sincerely hope things get so much better for you!
Thanks. It wasn’t the reaction I was expecting, kinda the opposite. My dad’s the one who had sisters and only nieces on his side of the family, so I was expecting him to be the one with hang-ups about it. Nope, it was my mom. What I was hoping for was support for a little while longer until I felt like I could live on my own, but it sounds like that’s not gonna happen. My biggest frustration is not coming out sooner tbh. Woulda given me more time to make plans and meant that maybe I could have skipped years of feeling like a lazy, freeloading piece of shit (no, they never called me that, but that doesn’t stop me from feeling like it).
Sorry you’re going through this. But I’m proud of you for coming out!
Thanks, it really sucks. I didn’t expect the reaction I got. I kinda expected my dad to be the one who got upset while my mom was supportive, not the opposite. My dad was the one who had two sisters and only nieces on his side of the family, so I kinda expected he was gonna be the one upset by it; but he’s cool with it.
It also blew me away to hear that my grandparents voted for Trump after years of talking about how much they regretted voting for him in 2016 and how they’d never vote for him again. Guess I’m never coming out to them; not that I was totally expecting to due to their age, but it’ll be fun coming up with a reason why moving out means I’m forced to move across the country and possibly never come back (at least probably not while they’re still living).
Once you are moved out, and across the country, the song Cat’s in the Cradle, by Harry Chapin gives you the perfect believable excuse. I’d love to come visit, and I will once work isn’t riding me so much. We’ll get together then.
I love that song… It’s just so sad. The kid wants to spend time with his dad but can’t because his dad’s always busy, and then the dad wants to spend time with his kid but can’t because his child’s all grown up and is busy now.
I will say it took me awhile to wrap my head around my kid being a son not a daughter. My concept of womanhood is quite broad, I really and truly did not see it coming, just thought she was dykey , for lack of a better word, still doesn’t seem distressed at all either but that may be because all the kids at school just accept kids are whatever gender they say, it’s no big deal to them, and siblings all immediately supportive. I didn’t lay my trouble adapting on them, it’s not his problem, it’s mine - just saying you have known a long time but she has not, she will adjust.
She refuses to let me tell her why I can barely function. She refuses to let me describe what I’m going through. She says she “can’t handle it”, that “it’s not a top priority right now”, that she’s “trying to understand” why I’ve made this “choice” while also telling me things like “but I like you the way you are” and rejecting any information I send to her because she’d rather consult her friends that she “trusts more”.
She starts to have a panic attack whenever I try to talk to her about it and God forbid I tell her that she made a mistake because then I obviously hate her guts and want her to die. She’s literally accused me of that.
Those paragraphs reminded me of the !raisedbynarcissists@lemmy.ml community.
Absolutely. It’s not about the transition at all, she just can’t stomach the idea of losing an inkling of control.
Congrats on coming out!
My wife’s mom still insists on deadnaming her over a decade after her transition, and refuses to recognize her gender. Sucks because she could be in our lives but instead just gets a phone call at Christmas, and I’ve never even talked to her. Some parents just make that choice, sucks that your mom is one of them.
I’m hoping she’ll eventually come around. In the meantime though, I’m getting to try and figure out how to get on my feet long enough to move out.
Feeling depressed, trapped, and abandoned. Going through the motions, trying to come to terms that I won’t be a dad because the wife doesn’t want to risk a pregnancy under the conditions, and I won’t be a homeowner because no ones coming to help build houses or stop corporate real estate. Accepting I won’t be starting a business because I can’t risk losing healthcare, and will need every dollar I can hang on to. Settling for serfdom. You know, usual shit.
How are you.
Had to soak last week’s shirts due to anxiety sweats but this week will probably be lighter on the poor things. So, slightly worse than usual.
I feel you…I still can’t believe this country is so … ignorant of the consequences of this. It’s over
deleted by creator
That sounds very productive, wishing you luck in your pursuits
make simple medications
Really interested in this. Care to elaborate or share any sources on the matter?
deleted by creator
As someone studying engineering and also looking for a way out, what all options have you looked into? Immigration seems to be both expensive and competitive in most places, and those are two things I don’t know that I’m prepared for.
deleted by creator
I’m in Texas in a blue bubble - more than i had realized i guess. 80% of the people i know are blue. I work in public education, so most of the red people i know were considering voting blue because of the push for school vouchers. I rarely see maga stuff and the yard signs around me were 80% Harris. Because of that i was completely shocked last Tuesday by the popular vote and it’s left me kind of disoriented. My husband works in redville, so he’s disgusted and exhausted. My adult sons are sad, mad, scared. My DIL has called me crying a few times - her parents are trumpsters and she wants to cut them out. Luckily we have enough cash on hand to help the kids get passports ASAP and enough savings to briefly go out of state/country if she needs healthcare. I 70% believe that Republican infighting will slow them down and it won’t be as bad as feared, 30% ready for the leopards!
Depressed.
I haven’t gone on walks for a bit because I just cannot stand seeing those fucking signs. My mom and grandma are in a tizzy, and my mom is just as forlorn. She doesn’t even want to vote anymore.
And I’m so, so, so angry. I’m not saying Harris would be the second coming, but that anyone would pick a fascist over anyone is infuriating. The area I live in is not bougie, these signs were sometimes outside houses that have seen better days. And they doomed us all for at least the next four years. I’m so distrustful of my neighbors
not that we were close to begin with. I want to ask them why, I want to scream at them, I want to question them.I feel helpless. All my life I believed that there was some thread of decency that connected us, a thread of common sense. But there’s none. And that’s really upsetting.
Well you should ask them. Respectfully, without interrogation, and as part of a wider conversation that overall seeks to strengthen your relationships with your neighbours. You might find there is some sense there.
I’m from the UK, not USA. But I can see why some might vote for Trump. I wouldn’t, personally, because of stuff he’s said, but if you accept the premise “sure he speaks crazy but what he means is [non-crazy stuff]” then maybe there is some rationale behind their choice, and you might find you’re not as different as you think.
I’mma be real with you: I have zero interest in hearing someone’s reasons for voting for a fascist.
I hate this response when it comes from outside the US too. Not only for what you said, but also because they’re not taking gun ownership into account. You don’t even have to knock at someone’s door here, just pulling up into someone else’s driveway is enough for the crazies to pull the trigger…
then maybe there is some rationale behind their choice
34 felonies
Rape
Sucking off a microphone days before the election
There is 0 rationale and only delusion behind their choice
Not great. Have a trans spouse and a young daughter who goes to public school. Have been burning through savings lately to pay off medical debt and am scared of losing my job once the tariffs kick in. My state just made homelessness illegal so the thought of the house of cards coming down is real
Pro: a handful of my state’s absolute worst officials are set to quit their jobs and we get a do-over.
Con: they’re quitting to join the administration and they’ll be way more powerful and everyone else will suffer.
Sorry. I did what I could.
Lemmings gonna lem, but I blame the millions of Dems who stayed home because Kamala didn’t meet their moral purity standards and they refused to be “complicit in genocide”. Cuz everyone knows it’s better to walk over broken glass barefoot than wear uncomfortable shoes, right? If some of the 10 million who voted in 2020 but not 2024 had bothered to show up, we’d be looking at a very different story. Righteous dumbfucks.
Campaigning is getting people to vote for you which includes getting people out to vote. Those are the true “swing” voters. Her campaign failed in this regard
Yeah, it’s not the fault of the voters, but a lack of advertisement.
God, I hate this timeline.
I think Kamala could have been the perfect candidate and she still would’ve lost.
The economy being in the shitter under the Biden-Harris administration killed any possibility of either of them winning another term. The economy ended up being the single biggest issue for American voters. Way bigger than bodily autonomy for women, LGBT+ rights, or Palestine.
I think it was closer to 15 million
The stats I saw were 81 million in 2020 and 71 million in 2024, but I’ve been unable to find that table, maybe you’re right.
it could be, I’m going off videos and stuff, not my research
Honestly I am so scared for my children. If Trump goes through with dismantling the Education department I do not trust my state at all not to destroy our public school system.
I grew up in a progressive city in a gerrymandered-to-hell swing state. Cheeto’s first win promptly sent me into a tailspin there. I’ve moved a handful since but now find myself in MT 80 miles from the border, you know, just in case.
Red up here is different than red down there. There it was like rubbing salt in the wound, here it’s quite obviously because there aren’t enough people to know any different.
I’m nonbinary and have been laid off in Florida about it, so I no longer disclose that information professionally. It’s not the most pleasant, but hey, hiding in plain sight is a really good way to see what’s coming down the pike.
deleted by creator
<3
Cheers, used to live there but moved when Gianforte made an example out of that sweet trans public servant from Missoula. I’d pick a blue state to live in if you can. I’m an optimist and think things will recover (with permanent damage) but it’s going to get a lot worse before it gets better :/
I developed a pretty strong sense of apathy for most of the people around me, who either won’t vote or vote for whatever Fox News tells them too.
That being said, I’m fearful for the friends I have that feel they will need to hide who they are just to go about their lives.
Man I feel you there. The apathy is real. I feel for those who are innocent who are really going to be hurt by this. I’ve stopped caring about anyone who voted for it. You’re on the lower income but can’t afford food? Too bad he’s coming for food stamps. Bootstraps. Grandma needs Medicaid but voted red? Sorry grandma, better get a job.
For all those who truly voted to try to save these things, my heart goes out to them. The rest though, it’s going to be painful.
The ironic thing is that they did it all to own the libs. The thing is though, the vast majority of “libs” I see push for these programs for others, not themselves. But these people can’t even comprehend that we want to help people and assume we want free stuff. All the while it’s them that we were probably helping the most. It’s absolutely asinine
Well put
Looking into immigration opportunities for college students
If you can become fluent in German tuition is free and you still have access to US federal support (for now)
German’s an easy language, right?
Speaking of Germany, how’s their government doing?
(Half joking, can’t be worse than what’s happened here)
We are working on the same shit, don’t worry.
German’s an easy language, right?
Actually it really is if you speak decent English, about half of our language is basically the same
There’s a cool YouTube video out there with phrases in English, German, and Dutch to show that you can communicate shockingly well between the 3 languages if you’re careful, they’re that similar
Lemme know how that works out for an engineering degree taught in Deutsch
I’m just giving up worrying and taking a break. I can’t control these people. I’m gonna wait and see what happens and laugh at them when it blows up in our faces. Crying and laughing at the same time.
I’ll join you in craughing
I guess they do already have the market cornered on lying.
The tarifs are probably the first shitstorm. Buying any electronics and China-ware I preemptively think I’ll need.
deleted by creator
And also insurance rates are going to go up as well due to cost of repairs pushing many to drive illegally without insurance
I am moving to a blue state as soon as possible. Work already lined up, working on housing and arrangements for my animals. It’s not safe here.
Safe travels friend
