• CatZoomies@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    If this dude registered as a Sovereign Citizen, he would have been fine!

    I’ll show you:

    Police: “What’s in the bag? Does that say ‘no drugs’ on it??”

    SovCit: “I never entered into a contract with you!”

    Police: Snatches bag and starts digging.

    SovCit: “Neither the individual nor the STRAW MAN contracted with —- please stop!”

    Police: Tackles SovCit

    SovCit: “I swear this bag is not from the TRUSTEE or the STRAW MAN. It ain’t my bag. Do you have a claim against me because I’m — bro, maritime laws!!”

    Hmm… I guess this doesn’t work out after all.

    • TexasDrunk@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      You forgot the part where they yelled “Without prejudice!” and signed their bag in blue ink at a 45° angle.

        • vortexsurfer@lemmy.world
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          1 month ago

          You should also say/yell “I do not consent!”, because it’s illegal to search or arrest someone without their consent. It was a popular spell a few years ago, but I don’t see it being used much anymore, so it’s possible that the cops have found a counterspell. 😉

    • jaybone@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      I am just transporting a bag. The contents are not officially licensed to be regulated by the state.

  • jpreston2005@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    They definitely thought it was hilarious to keep drugs in that bag. However;

    Officers on Tuesday night stopped a man and a woman driving a stolen car in Southeast Portland, and they found much more than a stolen car

    They broke the most important rule. When breaking the law, only break one at a time. If you’re gonna carry around your fun joke drug bag, don’t do it while driving a stolen car.

  • rebelsimile@sh.itjust.works
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    1 month ago

    This is the kind of thing Chief Wiggum would proudly hold a press conference about while the thieves are carting away city hall in the background.

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 month ago

      I spent a few years retailing on eBay, selling off my father’s vast collections (he was like a hoarder, except much of his stuff had actual value) and I had a postal scale for lighter objects since most of the things I was selling were not more than a couple of pounds.

      So it looked like a drug scale.

      I used to have to show people that it actually said it was a postal scale on it if they came over and asked me if I was dealing drugs.