It’s an app like Grindr but also for straight people and it only works between 11 and 2 in the middle of the day Monday through Friday. It is used exclusively for finding someone to hook up with during your tech bro flexible hours extended lunch break.
I think this would unironically be successful and also would unironically remove so much fake tech bro productivity from capitalism that I almost want to do it. I could make millions and get the world to extend the lunch hour to a lunch hour and a half so folks still had time to eat during their lunch and lay break. This would extend down to other non tech bro industries and would be a workplace hours revolution.
The name is a pun on lunch and learn, the tech bro’s favorite activity.
This is a terrible idea.
Rendéz-screw
The thought of trying to have sex with a rando on a hookup app with a sloshy ramen belly full of noodles, lol.
Sex first, ramen after.
Imagine the Le Epic Soylent fart powder experience.
I think this would unironically be successful
It’d need a more bazinga name that continues the tiresome trend that Steve Jobs started and be lower case and probably fashionably misspelled.
laynch or something like that. I’d need to do more bazinga-appropriated drugs to come up with more.
BizSnatch
Ok, that’s pretty good
It’s an app like Grindr but also for straight people
Predicting right now that the proportion of users that are men will be the same for both apps
You could make a version aimed at libs called brunch and bang.
This one has potential.
BangBrunch?
GOOD idea
I think there would be a bit of a gender ratio issue lol
Not if we pair up the tech bros with each other
That seems like a great idea until I remember Peter Thiel
Why would anyone want to have sex when that time could be spent programming instead. I don’t understand.
You know how Bumble has like Bumble BFF? We’ll launch a companion app called Paired Programming where you just go work over lunch together
Actually kind of need this lol. I don’t have anyone to talk to when the site I am working on shits the bed.
Omg you could call it Lunch Laydy
This is the premium subscription name. $5.99 a month until it gets big and then we jack that price up to $30.99 once we have the tech bro hookup market cornered
You gotta wait to jack the price up after you sell off to another company that promised not to ruin it but then adds micro-transactions, and other gamification/enshitification. Looking at you Fleksy keyboard.
It is used exclusively for finding someone to hook up with during your tech bro flexible hours extended lunch break.
The challenge for this app would be to find sufficient consenting feeemale app users for its own internal ecosystem, I think.
The top-tier way bazingas “lunch and lay” is more like this: (CW: SV, drugged coercion, mind control experiements)
https://www.vanityfair.com/news/2018/01/brotopia-silicon-valley-secretive-orgiastic-inner-sanctum
DO IT DO IT DO IT
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