- cross-posted to:
- nonpolitical_memes
- cross-posted to:
- nonpolitical_memes
Even the olive, while not liquid, is kinda mushy.
Is a dehydrated olive a thing? I hate olives with a passion, but maybe that’s a thing my wife would like.
When you get them on pizza they are kinda dried out, so I imagine so?
I ordered a mudslide from that guy and there wasn’t a bit of mud in it
Well yeah, it slid off…
“I’ll have a screwdriver”
“Sir, Home Depot is two blocks over.”
“one hurricane please”
“This is Nevada, try New Orleans”
Don’t even get me started about sex on the beach.
I ordered a blowjob and just got slapped across the face
Well, duh, to make a dry martini, you are suppose to dry all the liquid ingredients in a tumble dryer first before you mix them, of course.
Why else do you think James Bond always asks for his “dry” vodka martini to be “shaken, not stirred”?
Source: former bartender and current frontrunner to replace Daniel Craig as James Bond
As you obviously understand the best way to properly dry a martini (what kind of loon would line dry the component liquids), you have my vote!
I was wondering this too, so I looked it up
From Google:
First, ‘dry’ indicates that very little vermouth has been added to the cocktail, so the gin is the primary focus. The typical ratio is 6 parts gin to 1 part vermouth. However, order ‘extra dry’ and you’ll get the slightest splash of vermouth, or even just a glass-coating wash.
When talking about alcoholic drinks, “dry” is just the opposite of sweet. Vermouth has a slight sweetness to it, so use less vermouth to make the drink “dry”.
Personally I like my martinis “dirty” (extra olive juice), with a good amount of vermouth. Sweet and salty with the floral notes of the gin in the background. If I wanted to just taste the gin then I’d put it in a shot glass and drink it straight instead.
I just want to second the dirty gin martini.
I’ve never been a fan of the martini, but dirty gin is excellent.
Alcohol culture…
Gin, you want gin in a fancy glass
Wave a sealed bottle of vermouth near it
Slow your roll there, cowboy!
What’s a vermouth
It’s just the mouth parts of animals like rats and stuff.
Type of fortified (i.e. with added spirits) wine flavored with herbs
I think it is fairly foul. It doesn’t seem to add much to cocktails and adds a bitter aftertaste.
That is a feature, not a bug
My city has a “no straight spirits” rule for bars, it’s a failed attempt to stop binge drinking
So I would order whisky on the rocks, hold the ice
Were I a gin fan it would be a “perfectly dry martini”
The bar staff agree the rule is stupid and are usually happy to work around them. Binge drinking in bars hardly happens anyway as it is too expensive, we have very high alcohol taxes, except on wine.
My buddy went to the bar at university and asked for a manhattan to see what they’d do, they handed him a bud light.
Pro tip: Use molten lava. Lava is a liquid, but I don’t think anyone describes it as “wet”.
Lava doesn’t adhere to a surface like water, it won’t climb the walls of it container slightly. That is to say, it won’t wet a surface, like water or flux will.
At least I don’t think any kinds of lava or magma do. Maybe there’s a variety that does?
Water is just the lava of ice.
Maybe there’s a variety that does?
Magma from borax, lime, or galena? All are definitely minerals and definitely fluxes.
Idiot. You’re supposed to mix a nartinit, drink it, and give her the dry glass. Bro probably just cock blocked himself.
When your dick is a non-orientable, self-intersecting manifold.
As a bartender this is always a fun one when training lol. Perfect teaching moment.
Martini, extra dry, wet on the side, gaseous and plasma forms in secure containers.
If it’s not on the side, I’ll send it back.
Add additional liquids to make a liquor dry. It’s practically chemistry!
I don’t get this one.
Martini is a drink made from liquids?
Yeah, but I was reading it to myself in my head and the statement sounds incomplete. Like the guy hit “tweet” too soon and then just didn’t correct it
I’ll explain as if your first language is not English.
Dry means something that has no moisture in it, like sand can be dry or wet.
Obviously something dry contains no moisture or liquids.
A Martini is a cocktail, mixed from mostly gin and vermouth. In this context, dry means “little vermouth”, so the taste of the gin is most prevalent.
So the joke is between the two different meanings of the word, as obviously a dry cocktail makes no sense if you take the first meaning of the word.
See? I don’t drink alcohol I don’t know these terms
“I’l have …” - No, you don’t. You may get it, if you ask for it. I hate when people use that snobby way of stating that they already have what they trying to get!
You’d really hate idioms. They don’t even make any sense, unlike the phrase here
It depends, I propably won’t understand the most english idioms, but I am able to hate the ones in my native language, because some of them are very stupid. ^^
The “I’ll have the beef” way of stating an order doesn’t come off as rude or imposing. There are only a few ways of saying what you want and people like variety, perhaps it’s that which makes it a normal phrase
If you don’t like being wrong (“I’ll have the spaghetti”; “no you won’t, we’ve sold out”) you can use phrases like “may I get …” or “I would like …” or in reply to whatever the waiter asks “the pasta marinara” with no introductory words