Taylor Swift. She’s cute I guess but her music is the audio equivalent of a lukewarm stale glass of milk.

I never had a Fark account but I remember following them religiously. I remember something about them crowdfunding an arena name for a day about an unsolicited finger in the ass.

In my jurisdiction the only ones formally exempted from jury duty are those who are employed in the courtrooms: judges, bailiffs, and court reporters.

There are several other occupations that, while not formally exempt, are almost guaranteed to result in you not being picked: law enforcement, child protective services, district attorney office, criminal defense attorney.

Same. Keeping the details purposefully vague even though the statute of limitations has long since expired.

I was out with friends having fun and actually stayed at the bar until they turned on the lights at closing and kicked us all out. I knew I was drunk but figured I should hit up the Taco Bell on the other side of the parking lot and eat in my car. Surely that would soak up enough alcohol to sober me up, right? I recall taking the most direct route possible to get back home, keeping my speed just below the limit. No cruise control so I had to focus as much as possible when it’s late, you’re tired and drunk and have a stomach full of grease.

The middle portion of the drive home was on a single long major arterial surface street. Luckily there weren’t any red lights since I doubt I could’ve stopped in time. The most terrifying moment was when I saw a cop car approaching me from behind. As I had a mild panic attack, he passed me up, didn’t turn on his lights, and went about his evening.

The rest of the trip home was uneventful. I got home safely, swore to myself I’d never be that stupid again, went to bed, and woke up the next morning probably still reeking of cigarette smoke and booze.

This is the single thing I am most ashamed of that I’ve ever done in my entire life. It’s more shameful than the time I lost my cool and shouted the n word at a kid when we were in middle school. It’s more shameful than the time I walked around high school with an unknown to me giant rip in my pants that let everyone see my sponge bob undies. It’s more shameful than when my dad caught me beating my meat to a Runner’s World magazine because I couldn’t find a Playboy.

I am very lucky that the cop just passed me by. I am very lucky that I didn’t have to drunk call my family at 4am to come bail me out of jail. I am very very lucky that I didn’t hurt myself or someone else.

True to my word, I’ve never done it again. I don’t drink at all any more, and even when I still did, I had a very strict two drink limit for myself if I was driving.

I don’t think I’ve ever even mentioned this when I’ve been in therapy. I’ve been in a relationship for over a decade and I’ve never even told my partner about it.

So yeah Lemmy. Learn from my mistake. Please. If you plan to get fucked up, have a safe ride home that doesn’t involve you driving.

While on a school trip, I ate a lot at a greasy buffet, then we went to a theme park. After one ride I managed not to barf but I wound up spending the remaining time in the park laying down on a bench trying to control my nausea.

For workplace specific advice Alison at AskAManager.org usually has a pretty good & entertaining thing going.

And yeah BoRU is one of the communities I miss the most from having quit reddit cold turkey.

Or car payments

“Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-it”

• Clay Davis

You could buy a can of coffee at the Ralph’s, that’s a very modestly priced receptacle.

Parents: “son its ok if you’re gay, we know its hard being different in a small town like this but youre still our child and we will always love you no matter what”

Me: “mom, dad, i’m not gay.”

Mom: “really? you sure about that?”

Dad: “you’ve literally never had a girlfriend and would be the only straight guy in town who hasnt. hell even most of the gay kids have had a beard at some point.”

Me: “i’m not gay… i’m just horribly depressed and have zero self esteem.”

Mom: “shit. whoops. i suppose we better find you a therapist then.”

Me: crawls into a hole and dies of embarrassment

I disabled my account four years ago when I realized how much plague stupidity and election stupidity on there was harming my mental health.

I doubt I will ever formally delete my account, as it’s the only source for pictures of some now-deceased family members. If hell freezes over and there’s a legit unavoidable need for me to be on there, I’m using desktop+web browser only, and probably in a browser that only gets used for the monthly visit to FB.

Any idea what the other major destinations were beyond Lemmy?

More ergonomic, more survivable, and more reliable too.

Dating apps are at best a crapshoot. They’re more interested in prying money out of you than anything else.

Like others have said, doing things you enjoy is a good way to meet people who enjoy the same things. Maybe you won’t meet your next bf/gf/etc directly, but perhaps someone you’ll meet has a cute single friend.

Being in a positive and healthy relationship is better than being single, but single-hood is better than being in an unhealthy and dysfunctional relationship.

Dating seems a bit like working on your mental health, in that both imply working on self-improvement (which ultimately should be done for intrinsic reasons, not just because it may get you laid).

Like the quote from the Bojack season 2 finale: “It gets easier. Every day it gets a little easier. But you gotta do it every day. That’s the hard part. But it does get easier.”

Apparently is a real strip club in Atlanta

Feels like watching the Yankees, Bama football, or Duke basketball struggle, doesn’t it?

For me at least, I don’t hate the teams so much as I hate the fanbases and all the fawning press coverage.

Mind you, it’s a sports hate not actual hate. I don’t want them injured, I just want them losing in hilariously offbeat and creative ways.

She had a one episode guest appearance in What We Do in the Shadows, and killed it.

I’ve watched all four seasons of Miracle Workers. He’s pretty funny in all of them.

Having different tastes than professional tv & movie critics isn’t a sin.

If you like something that Rotty Ts hates, that’s fine. If you despise something they adore, that’s fine too. It’s not like you’re being mean to someone’s puppy.

Just Dropped In - The Big Lebowski