NEW YEAR NEW ME!!!
No but on a more serious note, I always do like to evaluate the past year on this day. I’ve noticed that I let myself get stuck in a drag in my daily life much more than I needed to. Weeks could go by where I just worked, ate, watch some dumb show and slept. And it made me unhappy. A few weeks ago I decided that I’m going to change the way I spent my time so that I have more meaningful interactions with my friends, family and gf and so that I can prevent myself from becoming a zombie.
You guys have any plans?
I don’t like to think of them as New Year’s resolutions per se because of that cliché that not many people actually keep them, but I want to start eating better, like either cooking at home or trying to cut back on just eating junk food all the time.
I also want to become more physically active and fit. Recently, I’ve been going cycling and it feels great. I also like going to the gym, but I’m not consistent with it, and I get frustrated when I can’t do a particular exercise right. And besides those things, I’ve also tried to make a habit of stretching in the morning and throughout the day to improve my flexibility.
Another thing I really want to do is get back into art— I had such a passion for it almost all my life, but ever since high school where I fell into a feeling of depression that I’m still stuck in, I’ve lost all creativity and will to draw. I also want to find ways to spend my time other than mindlessly scrolling on my phone for hours, like maybe reading or going out more (which is hard since I got into a car crash a few weeks back).
I also need to figure out what I want to major in and ideally, where I’ll continue my education after graduating and getting my Associate of Science— I know that I have a passion for the sciences, but I just don’t know what specifically I want to study. I’ve heard that there are things like double majors and also minors.
Most of all, I want to get myself out of that aforementioned negative headspace I’ve been in since high school. I feel like the things that’ve gone wrong in my life amalgamated into a persistent feeling of depression and it’s affecting many aspects of my life. I don’t even know why it’s there— my dad doesn’t treat me like shit anymore and he’s even apologized for it, I’ve (for the most part) cut off the toxicity of social media from my life, I’m not a kid in grade school with little friends getting picked on anymore, I’ve done a lot to improve my appearance, I have a great job, I’m among the first in my family to go to college, so I don’t even fucking know…
I think a big part of it is that I’m so lonely compared to back in school, when no matter how much shit sucked, I at least had friends and acquaintances.
What kind of stuff do you like to draw?
I hope you can find some friends/acquantinces, we all know how hard that is these days. Watch of for what we call “fast fire friends,” which has been every attempted friendship me and my partner have tried in the past year or two.