mommy
>no-foolin for-reals handjob
>over the pants rubbin
Y’all that’s not even a handy to a seventh grader.
unironically
over-the-pants hojo is a hojo nonetheless, I don’t make the rules
It ain’t!
Hojo or no hojo! Vote tonight on Hexbear’s Next Struggle Session!
I’d be willing to get super into the drama on this one to the point where multiple threads need to get made about my reaction and I post multiple paragraphs doubling down on my take before my ultimate ban
Hexbear, we need to talk about handjobs
Listen do it in one of my comms and I won’t delete the post
You’re doing the Lord’s work
I would call it manual labor maybe
I went in expecting to see a JFK, and all I got was horny after two glasses of wine during appies at Chili’s.
Vaping and doing over the pants hand stuff in a public theater, absolutely incredible. She’s like the cookie monster pajama girl from high school theater. Hypocrisy aside, it’s almost too charmingly adolescent to get mad at, it’s like hearing Mitch McConnell was caught smoking ditch weed out of an apple behind the dumpster.
cookie monster pajama girl
I’ve never heard this described as vibe before but…I get it.
Not to say I’m not the queer equivalent of that. Probably why I understand it.
I don’t know why this is a particular archetype of the universe but it seems like everyone who went to high school after 1990 knew at least one of these girls. Hoop earrings, flaming hot cheetos, eyebrow makeup, cookie monster PJ pants, probably very loud and liked getting into fights, started smoking cigarettes in 6th grade
50/50 brief emo phase
Gail the Snail from it’s always sunny
Fuck I can’t believe I forgot about that kind of woman. She literally is wtf.
She Lauren on my Boebert til I Beetlejuice
deleted by creator
Gay people are groomers unlike me, a conservative, who gives her bf a handy and lets him grope me up, in front of families and kids at a musical.
She was literally groomed by her first husband when he was 24 and she was a minor
He also flashed his dick to her friends in public, who were also minors
She was just trying to entertain the kids who found the show boring.
Omg that theater is PACKED 😭
is thrilled about the survival of his speciesi went to NYC recently and my girlfriend wanted to see the Harry Potter show(forgive me, HexBear). It was packed too. Then i found out it’s been running for like 10 fucking years. Goddamn so many cringe moments and a fuckton of cape flourishes. 3 fucking hours, never again.
Worst thing to ever happen to NYC
the coolest thing was some of the stage effects. that’s pretty much it. at least it wasnt a musical though. The score was done by Imogen Heap which i realized like halfway through cause they still sounded like her songs and I do like her music a lil bit.
This is the second time this story had me expecting to be in !fakenews@hexbear.net .
That is my only blocked community ever. It can be really funny, but the not-insignificant cognitive load it adds to scrolling the site is not worth it.
I think it mellowed out a bunch. When it was added it was way too much.
:spray-bottle:
Whooo doggy she’s a certified FREAK
mother
Seven days a week. With a bucket and a mop, apparently. My doctor wife, who is from canada and goes to another school so you wouldnt know her, says so
And this is why we retain our vital essences
Girls rock
Yo why does the video cut out early, where’s the rest
At this point, I’d just say “cool, have fun” if it weren’t for the MUH FAMILY VALUES sanctimony. But even then, at least it isn’t the rather common and even normalized
shit that the ruling class otherwise gets into, so it’s “cool, have fun, hypocrite.”The subplot of developing the town into an exurban haven for yuppies got her all horned up
