I didn’t mean for this post to cause a bunch of arguing in the comments =(
I thought this was just some gallows humor (e.g. “Everything’s lovely except that I have to fear for my safety all the time”) type of shitpost that sounded similar to comments I’ve heard from women irl a lot.
Hyperbole is exaggeration used for emphasis. When I say “fuckin’ none” I don’t mean literally zero, I mean an amount so indescribably tiny that it’s negligible. I hope that clears things up for you.