Dear God, Jesus, Vishnu, Isis, Ra, Muhammad, Mary, Zeus, Neptune, Thor, Gaia, The Eternal Black Void, anyone, everyone,

Please, please… make our timeline the one where Trump deports John Bolton to Tehran to stand trial for his countless crimes against Iran and its people. Alternatively, I am willing to accept sending him to Venezuela.

Just wrap his ass up and boot him out the back of a C130 like a lost Christmas gift arriving a month late.