wonder if we’re gonna get more comments complaining about the age of consent again this time
The only complaints about the age of consent I’ve ever seen in any of these threads are people either claiming that 18 is too low or asserting that a large age gap between adults is “literally pedophilia.” The other side has just been a consistent “you have to trust adults to make these decisions for themselves instead of infantilizing them, even if a big age gap is sus.”
And I mean I fundamentally dislike and distrust men in general and find the way they dehumanize, fetishize, and try to control women (or other men for that matter, because cis gay men–particularly richer ones–do it too) repulsive, but the counter to that isn’t declaring that some adult women are literally children because they might hypothetically become the target of some creep’s lust, it’s giving women more agency, rights, and education and trying to prevent the actual power disparity in our patriarchal hellstate that heavily enables abusers to prey on women in general, not just younger women. Is a middle aged man specifically pursuing college students or recent college graduates a creep? Probably, especially if he’s actively setting out to do it and it’s not just some incidental meeting, and it probably ties into gross youth-fetishization aspects of our culture, but it’s also not “literally pedophilia” nor can we can unilaterally say “actually this adult woman is not trusted to enter into this relationship for herself and so it must be prohibited on her behalf, as we have determined it’s some percentage more likely to be an abusive relationship than the baseline chance of abuse that a closer-in-age relationship has, which is also sickeningly high because we live in a patriarchal hellstate that teaches men to prey on women and grooms women to submit to this.”
And I mean I fundamentally dislike and distrust men in general and find the way they dehumanize, fetishize, and try to control women (or other men for that matter, because cis gay men–particularly richer ones–do it too) repulsive, but the counter to that isn’t declaring that some adult women are literally children because they might hypothetically become the target of some creep’s lust, it’s giving women more agency, rights, and education and trying to prevent the actual power disparity in our patriarchal hellstate that heavily enables abusers to prey on women in general, not just younger women. Is a middle aged man specifically pursuing college students or recent college graduates a creep? Probably, especially if he’s actively setting out to do it and it’s not just some incidental meeting, and it probably ties into gross youth-fetishization aspects of our culture, but it’s also not “literally pedophilia” nor can we can unilaterally say “actually this adult woman is not trusted to enter into this relationship for herself and so it must be prohibited on her behalf, as we have determined it’s some percentage more likely to be an abusive relationship than the baseline chance of abuse that a closer-in-age relationship has, which is also sickeningly high because we live in a patriarchal hellstate that teaches men to prey on women and grooms women to submit to this.”
Genuinely, I do agree with all of this, and my point really was that I want more conversations about this in particular. The point I was making is that, rather than being able to talk about the issues frankly like this, and how the patriarchal status quo we find ourselves in is the larger issue here, every single time instead the comments are full of jokes taking this to the extreme that effectively throw the baby out with the bath water. Whether or not my word is taken for it, I’m rational about this - I full understand the spectrum of human intelligence and agency, and I agree that in an ideal world this would not be something we worry about. I’m not so black and white in my thinking as to genuinely believe we can draw a line and say ‘That’s good enough’ with any conviction. I’m just jilted that any time this comes up, we get lost in comments about ‘oh in that case my relationship should send me to the gulag’, which I think we can agree is actively not helpful towards this conversation - I mean, in this comment section alone, how many comments are just variations on that joke, let alone the other comment section just 4 days ago. If I’m being honest with myself and with the community, it’s the response here that has me worried more than anything - the instant air of dismissiveness just rubs me the wrong way. Like at no point am I even bringing up pedophilia, but everything seems so centered around how such a thing would affect individuals here personally, instead of discussions that feel genuine about an issue whose discourse contains some ‘ultras’.
The point I was making is that, rather than being able to talk about the issues frankly like this, and how the patriarchal status quo we find ourselves in is the larger issue here, every single time instead the comments are full of jokes taking this to the extreme that effectively throw the baby out with the bath water.
Fair enough, though I personally think in general the community culture of casual shitposting coexisting alongside serious analysis and discourse is usually fine, even if things like this or the way some people use “volcel police” memes as a safe way to be horny on main toe the line a bit.
Like at no point am I even bringing up pedophilia
I will be fair and say that I’ve only seen that specific take once here, although some people were agreeing with it, and it’s just so wild that it sticks out in my mind whenever this topic comes up now.
The VOLCEL POLICE are on the scene! PLEASE KEEP YOUR VITAL ESSENCES TO YOURSELVES AT ALL TIMES.
نحن شرطة VolCel.بناءا على تعليمات الهيئة لترويج لألعاب الفيديو و النهي عن الجنس نرجوا الإبتعاد عن أي أفكار جنسية و الحفاظ على حيواناتكم المنويَّة حتى يوم الحساب. اتقوا الله، إنك لا تراه لكنه يراك.
The immediate joke responses are weird. There are healthy relationships with age gaps that have serious conversations before anything happens (and often are queer relationships tbh), but it seems like the people that make the jokes have no experience with this or have some stuff to work out personally.
Last time I saw age gap discourse pop off I saw someone get banned for advocating for a higher AOC, they were banned under “pedo apologia”. I never got the mods logic there
sorry if i keep coming across as incensed with these comments, but it feels like an insane blindspot for hexbear to have
like why of all things is this being memed on? Sure, you’ll see the occasional post that goes overboard but it’s incomprehensible to me to log on to this site and see people acting like there is NOTHING to be taken seriously here. EVERYONE has to have some ‘Power Dynamics’ or ‘well lock me up cos my girlfriend is two weeks younger than me’ joke to post for a handful of upvotes.
Maybe it’s because the users commenting have never dealt with this, or had friends who have, but it feels like this whole thing denies entire experiences that so many of my AFAB friends have had with older men manipulating and taking advantage of them at 16 (or if they have even a modicum of shame, waiting to pounce until theyre 18), and to see users here just brush the entire thing off - and for what? Legitimately for what?
That last question is why this whole thing smacks of defensiveness for me. Either that or a bunch of people being reactionary and scared of some imagined puritan boogeyman laying in hiding in the next generation.
yeah ngl i am probably the person in question who is being subquoted here by the other user and a lot of the reason why i don’t bother to check my hyperbole around the issue is because of how positively revolting so many of the users here get about this stuff
like no it’s not “literally pedophilia” but i also don’t give a fuck, y’know? i want people to stop clamoring for the right to fuck teens. if comparing them to pedos makes even a single person go “hmm maybe this is a little weird” then hoo fucking ray but mostly i am just tired of everyone treating a situation that is 99% of the time an older man abusing a younger inexperienced woman like it’s a funny fucking joke
And these aren’t even “edgy” jokes made purely for shock value. These feel more like personal reactions and male defensiveness. And a lot of the people making these “jokes” seem to have he/him pronouns, which is even more suspicious. It’s almost like there’s some type of misogyny going on being passed off as irony… 🤔
Edit: Ah just looked at your post history and yup you brought this up last time. It seems nothing was done or learned from it.
it’s not a ‘thing’, but it is one user wielding it to try and shut down any conversation, but maybe they were trying to make a different point and made it in the most crude way possible
and people had the gall to tell me the other day that users on this site aren’t being weirdly defensive about this discourse
wonder if we’re gonna get more comments complaining about the age of consent again this time
The only complaints about the age of consent I’ve ever seen in any of these threads are people either claiming that 18 is too low or asserting that a large age gap between adults is “literally pedophilia.” The other side has just been a consistent “you have to trust adults to make these decisions for themselves instead of infantilizing them, even if a big age gap is sus.”
And I mean I fundamentally dislike and distrust men in general and find the way they dehumanize, fetishize, and try to control women (or other men for that matter, because cis gay men–particularly richer ones–do it too) repulsive, but the counter to that isn’t declaring that some adult women are literally children because they might hypothetically become the target of some creep’s lust, it’s giving women more agency, rights, and education and trying to prevent the actual power disparity in our patriarchal hellstate that heavily enables abusers to prey on women in general, not just younger women. Is a middle aged man specifically pursuing college students or recent college graduates a creep? Probably, especially if he’s actively setting out to do it and it’s not just some incidental meeting, and it probably ties into gross youth-fetishization aspects of our culture, but it’s also not “literally pedophilia” nor can we can unilaterally say “actually this adult woman is not trusted to enter into this relationship for herself and so it must be prohibited on her behalf, as we have determined it’s some percentage more likely to be an abusive relationship than the baseline chance of abuse that a closer-in-age relationship has, which is also sickeningly high because we live in a patriarchal hellstate that teaches men to prey on women and grooms women to submit to this.”
Genuinely, I do agree with all of this, and my point really was that I want more conversations about this in particular. The point I was making is that, rather than being able to talk about the issues frankly like this, and how the patriarchal status quo we find ourselves in is the larger issue here, every single time instead the comments are full of jokes taking this to the extreme that effectively throw the baby out with the bath water. Whether or not my word is taken for it, I’m rational about this - I full understand the spectrum of human intelligence and agency, and I agree that in an ideal world this would not be something we worry about. I’m not so black and white in my thinking as to genuinely believe we can draw a line and say ‘That’s good enough’ with any conviction. I’m just jilted that any time this comes up, we get lost in comments about ‘oh in that case my relationship should send me to the gulag’, which I think we can agree is actively not helpful towards this conversation - I mean, in this comment section alone, how many comments are just variations on that joke, let alone the other comment section just 4 days ago. If I’m being honest with myself and with the community, it’s the response here that has me worried more than anything - the instant air of dismissiveness just rubs me the wrong way. Like at no point am I even bringing up pedophilia, but everything seems so centered around how such a thing would affect individuals here personally, instead of discussions that feel genuine about an issue whose discourse contains some ‘ultras’.
Fair enough, though I personally think in general the community culture of casual shitposting coexisting alongside serious analysis and discourse is usually fine, even if things like this or the way some people use “volcel police” memes as a safe way to be horny on main toe the line a bit.
I will be fair and say that I’ve only seen that specific take once here, although some people were agreeing with it, and it’s just so wild that it sticks out in my mind whenever this topic comes up now.
نحن شرطة VolCel.بناءا على تعليمات الهيئة لترويج لألعاب الفيديو و النهي عن الجنس نرجوا الإبتعاد عن أي أفكار جنسية و الحفاظ على حيواناتكم المنويَّة حتى يوم الحساب. اتقوا الله، إنك لا تراه لكنه يراك.
The immediate joke responses are weird. There are healthy relationships with age gaps that have serious conversations before anything happens (and often are queer relationships tbh), but it seems like the people that make the jokes have no experience with this or have some stuff to work out personally.
Last time I saw age gap discourse pop off I saw someone get banned for advocating for a higher AOC, they were banned under “pedo apologia”. I never got the mods logic there
Would a higher AOC still vote to fund arms to Israel?
spoiler
I’m sorry but it was impossible for me to prevent this.
sorry if i keep coming across as incensed with these comments, but it feels like an insane blindspot for hexbear to have
like why of all things is this being memed on? Sure, you’ll see the occasional post that goes overboard but it’s incomprehensible to me to log on to this site and see people acting like there is NOTHING to be taken seriously here. EVERYONE has to have some ‘Power Dynamics’ or ‘well lock me up cos my girlfriend is two weeks younger than me’ joke to post for a handful of upvotes.
Maybe it’s because the users commenting have never dealt with this, or had friends who have, but it feels like this whole thing denies entire experiences that so many of my AFAB friends have had with older men manipulating and taking advantage of them at 16 (or if they have even a modicum of shame, waiting to pounce until theyre 18), and to see users here just brush the entire thing off - and for what? Legitimately for what?
That last question is why this whole thing smacks of defensiveness for me. Either that or a bunch of people being reactionary and scared of some imagined puritan boogeyman laying in hiding in the next generation.
yeah ngl i am probably the person in question who is being subquoted here by the other user and a lot of the reason why i don’t bother to check my hyperbole around the issue is because of how positively revolting so many of the users here get about this stuff
like no it’s not “literally pedophilia” but i also don’t give a fuck, y’know? i want people to stop clamoring for the right to fuck teens. if comparing them to pedos makes even a single person go “hmm maybe this is a little weird” then hoo fucking ray but mostly i am just tired of everyone treating a situation that is 99% of the time an older man abusing a younger inexperienced woman like it’s a funny fucking joke
And these aren’t even “edgy” jokes made purely for shock value. These feel more like personal reactions and male defensiveness. And a lot of the people making these “jokes” seem to have he/him pronouns, which is even more suspicious. It’s almost like there’s some type of misogyny going on being passed off as irony… 🤔
Edit: Ah just looked at your post history and yup you brought this up last time. It seems nothing was done or learned from it.
K wait what? I haven’t seen this. Is people on communist pages complaining about the age of consent a thing?
it’s not a ‘thing’, but it is one user wielding it to try and shut down any conversation, but maybe they were trying to make a different point and made it in the most crude way possible
Not my side in the fight but I think you have to admit liberals would infact do that.