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I feel like most people are wildly inconsistent on this. Fat shaming? Small dick energy? How about mental illness? Baldness for some reason? Disabilities? Oh, we could probably go on about those. Some people seemingly decide a line is too simple and draw a complex sine function instead.
My rule is to try to be decent. Sometimes, I even succeed. But I don’t think I’m very good at it, and neither are most of you. Bunch of hypocrites, we are.
I’ve always liked “Just don’t punch down.” But you’re right, we’re all hypocritical in some form or another.
The issue is that even when your target is “up”, using common characteristics as insults means lots of people below that are going to catch strays, as it were.
But what if it’s in the positive? Damn girl I like your fat ass. But I can see it being used negatively.
I like Big Dick Energy though. Can we keep that?
Nope. Far too misogynistic and aggressive. It implies there are small dicks and it even completely ignores people born without dicks or had them removed.
The point is, there is no such thing as perfection. We all follow the “Open mouth and insert foot” rule on occasion. But we can try to do our best knowing we will often fail. And when others fail us in return, we must learn to gently correct and forgive.
I think you answered your own question? It depends on meaning and context, not just words themselves. And while positive messages intersect the overarching topic, they’re different enough that we can’t just bundle them together and treat them in the same fashion.
I like Big Dick Energy though. Can we keep that?
Can’t handle the magnitude of that question on my own, I’m afraid.
Actually must be pretty sheltered cause I just don’t run into this shit anymore.
The cool kids have moved on to using ableism to mock public figures. Now Trump is a psychopath, Musk is a narcissist, and Peterson is schizo.
I know right, can’t we just leave the high functioning unmedicated, untreated, psychopaths, narcissist, and schitzos alone. Its perfectly normal they hold reins of power.
It’s abelist to suggest that a personality that you don’t like is mentally ill.
You’re so cool
Not as cool as being an apologist for christo-fascists
You, uh, didn’t pay any attention to the point of the original post, did you?
Drag, I get where you’re coming from, but don’t you think those three groups are different?
Schizo? Schizo ppl are harmless and don’t deserve to have something fundamental to their mental state used as an insult. I completely agree with you here.
Narcissist? This wasn’t always a diagnosis and doesn’t always refer to one. I don’t see anything wrong with using this as an insult. Defending it under ableism kinda feels like calling the word “abuser” abelist - sure, abusive people probably also struggle with mental health.
Psychopath? That’s also pretty hard to defend.
Honesty I think you’d be better off pointing out how these people aren’t mentally ill and are fully culpable for what they do, instead of labeling it all abelist.
The word Schizo definetly doesn’t belong here, that is abelist. Peterson isn’t schizo he’s a close minded misandrist.
Defending it under ableism kinda feels like calling the word “abuser” abelist
Drag is willing to accept that premise only after psychologists put “abuser disorder” in the DSM. They can probably put it right next to “crime disorder” and “being a bad person disorder” within the “things that are behaviours and not mental health conditions” section. Until that section gets made, everything in the DSM is a mental health condition and NOT an action.
Honesty I think you’d be better off pointing out how these people aren’t mentally ill and are fully culpable for what they do, instead of labeling it all abelist.
Por que no los dos?
Trump is a criminal because he’s chosen to do criminal things. Musk is an abuser because he’s chosen to do abusive things. ASPD and NPD aren’t choices and they aren’t actions. Mixing up criminal and abusive behaviour with mental health conditions is ableist. It’s the ableism that happens when you hear about a bad thing and assume a minority did it. “Someone robbed the convenience store? Must have been a black.” “A famous musician molested a child? I always knew he was gay.” “A politician bribed a pornstar with campaign funds to hide his relationship with her? He must have a mental illness.” It’s wrong.
Taking words away from people that they use to describe their abusers (narcissist, psychopath) is going to hurt people who don’t deserve it (schizophrenia, etc) when you lump it all together as abelism. That’s my point.
In my opinion, they did put abuser disorder in the DSM. Here’s the diagnosis criterion for NPD (need 5/9, must be maladaptive) Notice how its just the description of an emotionally abusive person, when you need 5 and its gotta be bad enough to affect your life?
A grandiose sense of self-importance (exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements)
Preoccupation with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love
Believing that they are “special” and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions)
Requiring excessive admiration
A sense of entitlement (unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with their expectations)
Being interpersonally exploitative (taking advantage of others to achieve their own ends)
Lacking empathy (unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others)
Often being envious of others or believing that others are envious of them
Showing arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes
This is from Wikipedia, btw, I dont own the manual and cant find it online. DSM is just a guide to help psychiatrists give treatment to people who need help, not a list of descriptors you can no longer use.
Notice how its just the description of an emotionally abusive person, when you need 5 and its gotta be bad enough to affect your life?
Is it really? Let’s do some math.
A grandiose sense of self-importance (exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements)
The way other people feel about themselves isn’t an attack on you. You don’t have the right to police other people’s level of self esteem. Abusive traits so far: 0/1
Preoccupation with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love
The way other people feel about themselves isn’t an attack on you. You don’t have the right to police other people’s level of self esteem. Abusive traits so far: 0/2
Believing that they are “special” and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions)
The way other people feel about themselves isn’t an attack on you. You don’t have the right to police other people’s level of self esteem. Abusive traits so far: 0/3
Requiring excessive admiration
Other people having needs isn’t an attack on you. You don’t have the right to police other people’s needs. You can say no, you can say you don’t personally want to be asked or expected to do it, you can’t get mad at people for wanting something. Abusive traits so far: 0/4
A sense of entitlement (unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with their expectations)
This is called being a Karen, not being an abuser. Abusive traits so far: 0/5
Being interpersonally exploitative (taking advantage of others to achieve their own ends)
This one is abusive. Abusive traits so far: 1/6
Lacking empathy (unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others)
Other people not having the feelings you want them to have isn’t an attack on you. You don’t have the right to police other people’s feelings. Abusive traits so far: 1/7
Often being envious of others or believing that others are envious of them
Other people having bad feelings isn’t an attack on you. You don’t have the right to police other people’s feelings. Abusive traits so far: 1/8
Showing arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes
The way other people feel about themselves isn’t an attack on you. You don’t have the right to police other people’s level of self esteem. Abusive traits so far: 1/9
Okay, we did the math and found that only one out of nine traits is abusive, and given five are required for a diagnosis, it’s reasonable to assume most people with NPD don’t have any symptoms that make them abusers. On the other hand, most of the traits you called abusive were just other people’s feelings you don’t like. So it sounds like you’re just interested in being the thought police and acting like the contents of other people’s heads is an attack on you. Which, you know, is a method abusers use to control their victims. Drag doesn’t like you.
Drag doesn’t like you
Alright Drag, that’s fine. I usually respect what you have to say that’s why I took the time to type all that out. I’ll stay out of your replies in the future.
I’m just going to point out the criteria is “maladaptive” not being a Karen sometimes, so I don’t agree with your ratings. Being a pain in the ass sometimes isn’t the same as having something so wrong with your personality that you need a pathological label.
It sounds like you are being the thought police
I’m pointing out a word people have used for thousands of years to reference antisocial behavior really shouldn’t be called ableism, because when you do that, you weaken the word ableism. That’s hardly thought policing.
Sorry about the aggression. Drag thought you were unfairly judging people for the way they are, and wanted to make you feel the way you make people with NPD feel.
Drag thinks you’ve maybe understood the meaning of the word “maladaptive”. It doesn’t mean hurting other people. It means hurting yourself. Remember, diagnoses are part of medicine. Medicine is about helping the patient. It’s not about judgement. People with NPD require an excessive need for praise, and it’s maladaptive because it hurts them. The diagnostic criteria don’t have anything to do with whether it hurts other people. That’s not a factor.
Drag interpreted your statements as wildly aggressive, because drag assumed you knew this. Drag can forget how little some people know about the field of medicine. Try to think about what you said in the context of the maladaptivity applying to the patient: “You have feelings that hurt you, and having those feelings is an act of abuse.” That’s what the discourse is if everyone understands that medicine is about helping patients. Drag forgot that not everyone spends hours pondering the philosophical purpose of medicine.
Anyway, before drag hits post, drag wants to share an article drag read which really contextualised the last two thousand years of history of the use of the word “narcissist”: https://medium.com/@viridiangrail/narcissus-wasnt-an-abuser-he-was-queer-15a74e456838. The people who said the word started out being about abuse lied to you.
This isn’t a meme
A meme is a self replicating unit of cultural information. This is a meme
Internet memes and cultural memes are not the same thing. This isn’t even a cultural meme - it’s a screenshot of political opinion. Internet memes are pictures that are funny, ironic or relatable.
Yes they are the same thing.
I agree.
Friendly reminder: deadnaming Twitter is not transphobic.
what??? that’s like deadnaming elons child!! oh wait, he does that.
If you want to insult someone, don’t say things you find offensive. Say things they find offensive.
I am super racist against Republicans.
Like when we called Conservatives weird and they had a literal meltdown?
yeah and when that was clearly working the Harris campaign just dropped it in favor of stupid shit like bragging about republicans endorsing her.
I said that on here and was heavily downvoted. Granted, I was inebriated so a lot of anger came across (so I’ve since deleted it) so maybe it was that.
But pointing out hypocrisy is AOK
I don’t see anyone, on the left, disparaging public figures for being gay. I see plenty of people disparaging gay public figures for being hypocrites.
Yeah, that was my point
Yes, I agree with you
Ya just imagine the same thing but with racism
If everyone you meet is an asshole …
…you might be a redneck?
…You might just be a colorectal surgeon.
Calling someone a dick is phallic. Got it.
And calling someone a cunt is yonic.
