• FireRetardant@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      22
      ·
      4 days ago

      Sometimes they are just trying to relate by going “yeah I’ve had a similar experience” but it can come off as selfish if they focus on it too much or cut off your story to tell theirs.

      • NegativeInf@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        9
        ·
        edit-2
        3 days ago

        My ADHD tells me to try and empathize by sharing a similar experience. It took me so long to realize people were taking it as “one upping” now I just don’t share anything.

        • FireRetardant@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          4
          ·
          4 days ago

          Yea same here. I’ve learned to let to them get their full story out, then I ask if I may share a similar experience,

      • zout@fedia.io
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        3
        ·
        4 days ago

        I know. Specifically, I mean the kind of people where you can tell from the moment you start talking, they’re listening not to your story, but for a hook to turn the story about them. I have a coworker like that, if I tell a story about something that happened to me this week, he’ll tell a story about what happened to him or his family 20 years ago, which by the way is way worse/better. He is also always the hero in these stories. I find most of these people are deeply insecure and try to cover this with a big mouth. So, bully behaviour basically.