Hi. I’m new to Lemmy so I thought I’d break the ice with this introductory post. I’m from Romania. Please be respectful, thank you. ^^

  • OsrsNeedsF2P
    16·
    2 months ago

    1. I mean that’s pretty crazy, what an intro. You said you’re from Romania, but you’re posting in a Canadian Lemmy server. Are you living in Canada now, or is this just where you found the community?

    2. What does your future look like? Babies are a lot of work; do you plan on studying more and going to work alongside, or …?

    3. You mentioned in a previous comment the condom broke and morning after pill didn’t work. How did you feel back then? Were you comfortable going through with it? Tell us more about your husband’s situation too

    • oneautumnday@lemmy.worldOP
      131·
      2 months ago
      1. I found this place on Reddit Alternatives… didn’t know it was Canadian. 2. I plan on definitely going to university. That’s a non-negotiable, to both my in-laws and parents, lol. My in-laws have the money, so with hired help (+ “the village” of course) & efficient time management, I’m confident it’ll be fine. There are people who work full-time and still attend university after all… 3. Honestly I felt nothing. It didn’t feel real to me until I got the positive pregnancy test. But when I sent my husband to buy the pill, I also had him buy prenatal vitamins, 'cause if I were to be pregnant, I preferred to do it properly. My husband is a 2nd year business administration student and also works for his family’s business. I met him at high school (we were both students at the same high school at the time).
      • Otter@lemmy.caEnglish
        16·
        2 months ago

        On point 1:

        This particular community (AMA) was created on lemmy.ca, which is an instance of lemmy hosted in Canada, but everyone is free to use it! We have a lot of general communities like that, in addition to the ones specific to Canada

        The user was likely just curious if you moved, you’re fine to post here or any lemmy.ca community :)

    • oneautumnday@lemmy.worldOP
      151·
      2 months ago

      I’m happy. Pregnancy happened due to contraception failure (condom broke, morning after pill didn’t work). We got married 'cause I didn’t want to have a baby out of a wedlock (with parental and juridical consent - you have to provide a strong reason why you want to get married if you’re under 18 - minimum is 16 - and my reason was that I was pregnant with medical proof).

    • oneautumnday@lemmy.worldOP
      91·
      2 months ago

      Haven’t really thought about that… I mean who knows if the kid will even have kids or if they’re going to have them really late in life, lol (valid choices). But sure, if it happens that’s cool.

    • oneautumnday@lemmy.worldOP
      82·
      2 months ago

      What’s the correlation…? A person who was active almost a decade ago on an entirely different site happened to have the same somewhat generic username as me… and you think it’s the same person? One of the biggest reaches I’ve ever read. My account name was chosen because I created it on an October day…😭

        • oneautumnday@lemmy.worldOP
          61·
          2 months ago

          This is absolutely not a rule & not something I even do + I don’t understand trying to hard to discredit me by making all these assumptions as if I’m spreading propaganda or trying to scam people…

    • Luci@lemmy.caEnglish
      5·
      2 months ago

      It’s a pretty generic username. I think this is a stretch.

  • ebc@lemmy.ca
    6·
    2 months ago

    Not a question, just words of encouragement from a dad who was in a similar situation. My oldest daughter was born when I was 20; I was in my third semester of university at the time. We managed to make it work, but my wife basically dropped her studies and became a full-time mom. It was a bit hard financially during university, but I managed to make it work and I graduated on time with pretty good grades, and I found a pretty good job right after. We were already planning on having kids (obviously after our studies), so we decided to keep going and we had a second daughter 2 years later (I was still in university at the time).

    My oldest turns 15 next month, and she’s growing up to be a very well-adjusted, gorgeous woman. She makes me very proud. Well, all 4 of my daughters make me proud (yes, I’m still with their mom. We married after university; there’s no “children out of wedlock” stigma here).

  • LucidBoi@lemmy.dbzer0.com
    4·
    2 months ago

    Welcome!

    Are you living with your parents? Did the father move in too? How are you dealing with it? Did you want to have a kid?

    • oneautumnday@lemmy.worldOP
      111·
      2 months ago

      Thanks! No, I moved in with my husband & in-laws - they have the nicer place. I’m doing great. 17 weeks + 4 today, going to school as usual (teachers, administration and students have been supportive). Did I want to have a kid? Not that early. But once it happened, the only thing that felt right for me was to keep the baby (but that’s just me, I’m a strong supporter of abortion rights and believe everyone should have a choice).

  • mox@lemmy.sdf.org
    52·
    2 months ago

    How old is the father?

    Is he your husband?

    What are the local laws around age gaps in sex and marriage?

    What are the local cultural norms around the same?

    Have either of those things made your relationship difficult?

    • oneautumnday@lemmy.worldOP
      41·
      2 months ago

      Yes. Mircea, Marcu, Ioan, Anton… all boys names. I have a strong feeling the baby is gonna be a boy, so boys names are all I’ve had in mind (don’t want to find the sex before birth). I still have to consider girls names too tho… my male name choices are quite “archaic”, strong and very Romanian, lol. That’s what I like.

  • m0darn@lemmy.ca
    2·
    2 months ago

    Marriage is a partnership, and parenthood is a partnership, but they are different. Did you get married before you discovered you were pregnant?

  • angrystego@lemmy.world
    1·
    2 months ago

    You said you plan to go to a university. What kinds od studies are you interested in? I suppose you still have time to make up your mind, but I’m curious :) Good luck to you in all you do!