• Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    Once again, you do not get to tell me about my friendships or how meaningful they are.

    Comment sections are no different than sending letters. My friendships with people I met on forums are no different than the relationship between Helene Hanff and Frank Doel except their correspondence was far slower and there was far less of it.

    I get that you can’t make such friends. It’s bizarre to me that you think this is a universal thing even when you’re directly being told it isn’t.

    • queermunist she/her
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      1 month ago

      Letter correspondence, too, occurs over long periods of time. It’s like forum discussion, the medium just too different to compare.

      A comments section is ephemeral, this conversation lasted a few hours and now we might never talk again.

        • queermunist she/her
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          1 month ago

          No, but I don’t think I was saying your friendship is impossible anyway. I said arguing on the Internet is pointless and that you can’t convince anyone of anything here, and then you dragged me off topic. Enjoy your friendships, as unlikely as they are - friendship can happen in unlikely places after all.

          But no matter how much you might wish it, nothing you post will impact the election even slightly. You have to log off and talk to people face-to-face for that.

          • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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            1 month ago

            Well I certainly can’t convince you that it’s possible to make friends wherever people can regularly communicate, that’s for sure. I’m not sure why considering it’s been long-established.

            This will really surprise you. You will probably say they had no real friendship until they met in person even though it’s clear they did:

            My husband and I met on youtube comments 5 and a half years ago. We chatted on the comment stream for a while, exchanged imessages, then started facetiming. He is from England and I am from the US. We were lucky enough he came over for a business trip the next state over three months later, and we met in person. It was wonderful! We got engaged after being together for 9 months when he was staying in the US for three months.

            I visited him for a few weeks in the winter before coming back to marry him in late May. It took 14 months for him to immigrate to be with me in the US. We’ve been married for four years, together in person for 3 years. I would highly encourage you to meet with your SO for as long a period as possible in as normal life a situation as you can, and discuss the mundane things you do everyday and how you handle your life. You want to be on the same page. Living together for a period of time if at all possible can be crucial. It’s more important thanhaving many shorter visits, I think.

            https://www.reddit.com/r/Marriage/comments/oepidv/is_there_anyone_who_met_their_current_spouse/

            • queermunist she/her
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              1 month ago

              Complaining doesn’t matter, your arguing doesn’t matter, nothing we post matters.

              This is what I said. You interpreted this as me saying that friendship is impossible, but I wasn’t intending that. I do think it’s hard, and shallow, but sure it can be done.

              What I think is impossible in comment’s sections is political action, which is what we were talking about before you brought up the power of friendship.

              You have to log off to change people’s minds about politics.

              • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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                1 month ago

                I do think it’s hard, and shallow, but sure it can be done.

                Yes, I know you think you understand my friendships better than I do.

                You don’t.

                You don’t know me, you don’t know my friends.

                Stop pretending you do. Stop implying I’m lying.

                It may be hard for you to make friends. It may be that your friendships are shallow. Stop telling me mine are because you have no fucking idea.

                This is the stupidest attempt at gaslighting I have ever seen.