The fuck? Do I want to date or not? What is wrong with me?

Shit is dangerous to do, I’ve had guys get very pissed at me for this behaviour.

  • CommunistCuddlefish [she/her]@hexbear.net
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    4 months ago

    Ouch that sounds heartbreaking, to have been friends for years and then date and then that happen </3 That’s awful. Sorry that happened to you too but thank you for sharing, it helps me feel less alone with it.

    It’s weird, it’s a pain that really lingers well past the desire to be with a person (it took some time but at this point I don’t even like her or want anything to do with her now after she hurt me so bad). There’s kind of a systemic factor at play too – people get so traumatized by the general sexism and shittiness of society and then are too broken to make healthy connections and pass their pain on to others. Took me quite a while and a lot of processing before I could open up to anyone else and even consider dating again after what she put me through.

    I hope you’re doing better now

    • OptimusSubprime [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net
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      4 months ago

      Hey Com, that’s what we’re here for. Knowing that “I’m not alone” is that 1st step to clearing out the hurt.

      I tried dating again recently and I wasn’t feeling it. I know in the back of my head I was comparing those other women to her. For now, I’m just gonna work on me and leave dating alone.

      • CommunistCuddlefish [she/her]@hexbear.net
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        4 months ago

        That’s rough but I commend you for realizing you need to just focus on yourself for now, that’s the right call to prevent hurting someone else. I hope you get to a better place and find the right person / people for you when the time is right!