• NocturnalMorning@lemmy.worldEnglish
    30·
    5 months ago

    I told my partner we had to stop scheduling our entire vacation bcz it was stressing me out.

    Now we schedule one or two things in certain days and then do whatever we want, and I deal much better with that.

  • Xantar@lemmy.dbzer0.comEnglish
    13·
    5 months ago

    When you really think about it, chaos is the natural order tendency of the universe, entropy and all that. Ergo, order is against nature.

    • SparrowRanjitScaur@lemmy.worldEnglish
      8·
      5 months ago

      Chaos is the natural state, but life is part of the universe and life brings order. As long as there is energy for life to use to do its work, it will continue to bring order to an unordered universe.

      • VieuxQueb@lemmy.caEnglish
        10·
        5 months ago

        And was often left undiagnosed in the past. I know I probably have it hard and somewhere on the autism spectrum. (My estranged father, sister and nephew all have been diagnosed at varying degrees/combinations). But I can’t even get a appointment at my doctors office, there is never availability and I tend to stop trying after a few times until it bugs me again. It’s like the system here is made to weed out people like me.

        It’s kind of nice to know why I felt/feel so inadequate. But it also hurt to know I will never feel normal. At 46 I feel so at a lost at a chance of a better future. I fucked it up so often, have no savings, have to work two jobs to barely get by (keep on doing bad financial decisions) etc… I always hope to win the lottery (I almost never play it) just to not have the stress of life catching up to me and going back on the streets.

        • setVeryLoud(true);@lemmy.caEnglish
          6·
          5 months ago

          There is no such thing as “normal”, just “rejected”. Society needs to adjust because autism ain’t going away.

          To get a diagnosis, you need to see a psychologist through a therapist, afaik doctors don’t usually hand out autism diagnoses. Seek psych clinics that specialize in neurodivergence.

          • Chewget@lemm.eeEnglish
            5·
            5 months ago

            Doctors can’t, it takes a several appointments with a psychologist (or psyc through therapist) to be sure before making a diagnosis. You don’t need to go to a specialist either

            • setVeryLoud(true);@lemmy.caEnglish
              3·
              5 months ago

              You don’t need to go to a specialist, but it definitely helps. I’ve had therapists deny my childhood autism diagnosis because they have no clue what to look for in a masking individual.

              Psych through a therapist is cheaper and easier in my experience.

        • Chewget@lemm.eeEnglish
          3·
          5 months ago

          Medicated ADHD can be close to normal. It definitely makes everything easier to do. For many like me it’s night and day, it becomes easy to focus and get tasks done. Seriously life changing.

          • setVeryLoud(true);@lemmy.caEnglish
            3·
            5 months ago

            You need to find the right medication though. When I was younger, I had Concerta, and it made me hyper focus but made me emotionless.

            I’ve been without meds for about 5 years now, but life is catching up to me, so I’m looking into trying some different ADHD meds.

            • Chewget@lemm.eeEnglish
              3·
              5 months ago

              I had/did the same. Switched to adderall and found out Concerta is trash(Ritalin). I found out that they went with Concerta because time release is easier to give to children and most of all, the manufacturer gave them kickbacks when it was still legal.

              • Chewget@lemm.eeEnglish
                4·
                5 months ago

                Plus with primarily hyperactive and combined, often parents take their kids in because they can’t handle them acting up. With Ritalin, when the personality is gone, there’s no more acting up… they choose that and go “wow, they’re so normal now”, not knowing the damage they’re doing to their childhood.

                • setVeryLoud(true);@lemmy.caEnglish
                  3·
                  5 months ago

                  That makes sense, it’s exactly what happened to me but I got the generic version of Concerta instead.

                  It kept me shut up, and it kept my conservative parents happy that they no longer had to deal with an autistic child, then wondered why I never developed as a person until I was out of the house.

    • dependencyinjection@discuss.tchncs.deEnglish
      8·
      5 months ago

      I got diagnosed in my late thirties and went from an abject failure at life to making some pretty astounding changes.

      I can’t take all the credit, I had quite a good support system to help me make the changes and I don’t think I’ll ever get over what I perceive as lost time or be fully happy, but it’s never too late.

    • Live Your Lives@lemmy.worldEnglish
      3·
      5 months ago

      I thought I had ADHD for a long while, partly due to communities like this, but when I went to get diagnosed, it turned out to be an anxiety disorder. So if/when you go, try to avoid letting your assumptions bias the results.

  • tabris@lemmy.worldEnglish
    8·
    5 months ago

    I was having a similar conversation to this many years ago with a friend. I summed it up as “I must have inconsistency, else I get stuck in monotony.”

    • dexa_scantron@lemmy.worldEnglish
      3·
      5 months ago

      I’ve had good results managing it by planning my week very loosely: I write down 1-3 things I plan to do each day (including work, exercise, cleaning, leisure, seeing friends, appointments) and it’s just enough structure to keep me moving without being stifling.

    • MataVatnik@lemmy.worldEnglish
      2·
      5 months ago

      Go to the wilderness and put yourself in a survival situation. There is no structure but if you don’t do something then you will die.