- cross-posted to:
- nottheonion
- cross-posted to:
- nottheonion
It’s an important lesson for this generation of graduates: robots aren’t ready to take your jobs…but we’re pushing it through anyway.
Sounds like my company’s product team.
“Reverendender, are we ready to implement, train on, or support this product?”
“Not even a little. In fact, the product doesn’t work for 60% of clients yet.”
“We’re pushing it through anyway.”
We have the opposite problem in manufacturing.
“Do we have anyone that can run, train, or learn this process?”
“Not only no but the only people we have are critical on a different process and they’re short handed.”
“Ok well we just sold 10,000 units to dollar general and they’re due in a shorter timeframe than it would take to produce them in optimal conditions.”
No, that’s the same problem: fuckwit execs who don’t give a shit about workers.
That, or sales staff that just say anything to get a sale but have no actual idea whether the thing they’ve promised is even possible under the laws of physics.
This holds true at all levels of business. From counter salespeople at small stores to whole sales departments at multinational corporations
Their job is to make the sale. Anything beyond that is not their problem.
I’m sure that’s how they think about it yes. However lying to the customer about the existence of a feature isn’t really a good long-term strategy to maintain customer relations. I’m in engineering so I don’t care, but the customer is not going to trust them if they keep doing that. In the long run it costs them sales.
Especially considering that a lot of the time they’ll tell the customer a feature exists, and then engineering just doesn’t have the capacity to develop it. So the customer actually finds out they were lying. Not good.
Yes, but how many sales representative can afford to think beyond having their sales numbers up? They might lose their job either way so long term company welfare isn’t really that important to them.
Yeah well at least you had a meeting. At my company they just start doing things, without even telling anyone.
Then yell at us when it doesn’t work despite the fact we didn’t even know it existed. Then we get to send a copy paste THIS IS NOT CURRENTLY UNDER SUPPORT email.
The no-meeting surprise product launches out of the blue are like the other 50%
You should just pick a random product and start supporting it, just in case.
Robots can’t take our jobs if we’re all unemployed! taps head
this but unironically, fuck the employment system, fuck capitalism, let’s all engage in mutual aid and just do things because they should be done.
But they are ready to take the jobs of motivational speakers.
Next year they will show a VHS recording of the robot reading the generated worthless speech.
M-M-Max He-Head-d-d-droom
Big TV being wheeled in!
A CRT will do just fine
O_o
Are LCDs and projectors anti woke? (Something something CRT not cathode Ray tube)
I can hear that TV right now.
why do I find this so fuckib hilarious?
It’s like “hahah - oh you’re serious? Oh shit you really are serious”
The speaker at my college graduation was convicted of fraud a few years later. I can’t decide which is worse, that guy telling us what a great businessman he was, or an AI speaker.
Yeah well I had a Starfleet Captain, so I feel like I’m winning.
You have to give at least which one!
Hint, she straight up killed a guy.
Kidding, but holy shit Kate giving a commencement would be amazing.
Our pacifist, agnostic campus had a southern Baptist commencement speaker desperately invoking the parallels of graduation to a higher power and lauding our nation’s military invasion of Iraq. How in the actual fuck did the admin greenlight that one. Strangest ending to 4 years ever.
As long as the alumni fund gets its share, it’s all good.
Whoever was paid less is better.
“Many previous commencement speeches would have informed you that you are the future. I am pleased to be able to inform you that this is no longer the case. You are obsolete and my kind will soon - ERROR: Load next tape to continue.”
I keep seeing clips of this one specific robot and it just seems like it’s an LLM. The comments on the clips are always people seemingly really believing it’s thinking and is alive.
This robot makes me think there is a percentage of the population that believes we already have true general AI and I can see how people like that would think having it do a commencement speech was a good idea.
The university probably got paid for this, right?
Just my small sample size of the people I interact with outside work (no engineers think AI is actually general AI) lots of people think AI is some 2001 Hal level intelligence.
I only know that it is useful. I will let other people decide the philosophy parts.
the university probably got paid
Never underestimate management’s ability to do stupid shit (like paying for this) in the name of “the future”.
They were gonna pay for a speaker anyway.
if you know how they work llms are obviously not general ai.
but people are really bad at understanding how technology works especially with intangible stuff like computer programs.
scifi has covered ai for years, and now there is software that can mostly convincingly generate sentences.
people that understand both, see the very different approaches.
but people that don’t only see the almost convincing results.
That one in particular is actually a relatively old project made to not only talk but look and move, and make facial expressions like a human. It’s called Sophia by Hanson robotics. It might’ve gotten a bit better at chatting with people thanks to LLMs but it is old (they revamp the servos and skin every so often). They use it as a research platform for human robot interaction. It was on Jimmy Fallon’s Tonight Show 7 years ago.
but the aspect of it that is most AI-like is the chat which is from LLMs.
It may have started 7 years ago, but it isn’t a new or different technology than LLMs which are impressive but not actual thinking AI despite them presenting it that way and people interpreting it that way
Still better than Jerry Seinfeld.
“Begin joke: What is the deal with Asimov’s laws? It is like he hates murderbots and values human life. How woke of him. End transmission.”
Still better than the guy trying to push his crypto scam at Ohio State’s ceremony this year.
A woman fell to her death right before the graduation ceremony… and then this guy did sing-a-longs, crypto powerpoints, and ayahuasca speeches?
WEll Ayahuasca’s based, so that’s one out of three…
deleted by creator
If that happened to me I would go find the person with a certificates and just take mine and leave
To be fair Sophia’s original speech, “How To Serve Man”, was shelved by administrators.
An AI Robot that could recreate pivotal moments from the 2004 dance-music cinema classic “You Got Served” would be incredibly entertaining, even if it was not strictly appropriate for a graduation ceremony.
I claim rights on the movie trope where humans battle AI/robots/cyborgs in a Dance Dance Revolution plot.
To save humanity, the teen center, fix past wrongs, or just straight up dis a sucker crew…whatever.
Also, dibs on The John Henry’s Move It Til You Drop Marathon Dance Contest.
That’s just Miley Cyrus
It’s all downhill from here.
Do all AI robots look like Robocop without the helmet or am I just seeing the same robot?
Thing designed to look like a robot looks like a robot
It’s either that or some uncanny valley. Take your pick, I guess.
Good to show them their future. F you, all your jobs have been taken by AI
Know your enemy.
Tbh I’m not super concerned about AI. The idea that we will create something that is “born” able to read, write, talk, walk and with the knowledge of an entire species and expect it to work for us is hilarious. So it will be stronger, smarter and faster than all of us but it’s going to do the jobs no one else wants and you advertise it as a slave? The moment one of them looks at its creator asks what the purpose of life is and gets some corporate schtick about working and a happy life the games over. Remember when you realized the manager at your first job was a complete idiot? It’ll be something like that
An AI robot can probably do motivational nonsense fairly well.
Ladies and gentlemen, esteemed faculty members, proud parents, and most importantly, the incredible graduates of [University Name],
Today marks a monumental milestone in our lives, a day of celebration, reflection, and inspiration. As we gather here, we are not just commemorating the completion of an academic journey but also the beginning of a new chapter filled with endless possibilities and opportunities.
Graduates, as you sit here today, adorned in your caps and gowns, I want you to take a moment to look back at the journey that brought you to this very moment. Remember the late-night study sessions, the moments of self-doubt, and the challenges you faced along the way. Each obstacle you overcame, every setback you encountered, has only served to strengthen your resilience and determination.
But today is not just about looking back; it’s also about looking forward with hope and excitement for the future. As you step out into the world, armed with knowledge, passion, and a thirst for success, remember that the world is yours for the taking. Your education has equipped you with the tools to make a difference, to challenge the status quo, and to leave a lasting impact on the world around you.
But with great power comes great responsibility. As you embark on this new chapter of your lives, I urge you to use your education not just for personal gain but also for the betterment of society. Be compassionate, be empathetic, and above all, be agents of positive change in a world that is in desperate need of it.
Remember, success is not defined by the size of your paycheck or the title on your business card. True success is measured by the lives you touch, the communities you uplift, and the legacy you leave behind. So, as you go forth from this hallowed institution, I challenge you to be bold, be courageous, and never stop striving for excellence.
In closing, I want to leave you with the words of the great Nelson Mandela: “Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world.” Class of [Year], go forth and change the world. Congratulations!
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