Step 1: ensure artillery shell is defused
Step 2: apply ketchup
Step 3: massage ketchup across the entire surface of the artillery shell for uniform coverage
Step 4: heat lentil soup over medium heat for 10 minutes
Step 5: remove ketchup from artillery shell, rinse with water, polish
Fully vegan, takes 10 minutes
I’m afraid to touch my car battery because electricity is wizard magic. Handling anything explosive is well beyond the point where I’d shit my pants to death.