• variants@possumpat.io
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    11 months ago

    Yeah I’ve noticed at least a lot from my high-school group that dating for about 4 years is a good amount of time, me personally and a lot of close friends seemed to have hit their hardships in a relationship around that 4 year mark. Also moving is a good test about how you do in stress haha

    • terminhell@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      Been married for 10 years now. There’s one thing I’ve found to be the ultimate relationship tester:

      Furniture Assembly.

      If you can survive assembling a few pieces of IKEA puzzles together it’s probably going to last XD

      • shuzuko@midwest.social
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        11 months ago

        Our way of surviving furniture assembly is for him to Go Away And Let Me Do It, because I can follow directions and he just tries to slap things together without looking xD

        I love my husband! Knowing when to just let the other person get on with shit is a pretty good litmus test, I agree, lol.

        • terminhell@lemmy.world
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          11 months ago

          Maybe it’s bad luck, but half the time the instructions are physically impossible to follow on certain steps.

      • SomeKindaName@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        I just don’t get this. I’ve never had any issues putting together furniture or dated anyone who had trouble with it. I can’t think of a single ex where furniture assembly was an issue.

        • immutable@lemm.ee
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          11 months ago

          I think furniture assembly is more about being able to work together for a common goal and communicate what you need the other person to do and listen to what they need you to do.

          For some reason a lot of people struggle to assemble ikea stuff (I honestly don’t know why, I’ve assembled dozens of items and it’s not rocket science). But there’s definitely been moments when I’ve been assembling some shelf and need my wife to assist with a two person step. If the assembly has been frustrating you have a really good test of how well can the two of you communicate through frustration and work together.

          So maybe you are great at ikea assembly and don’t have the frustration factor, or you are a wonderful communicator and listener. For a lot of people though it’s that “this is the 12th step, I’m annoyed because I did the 9th step backwards and had to undo some shit, I’ve stripped this fucking screw… I’m gonna slide this piece and you need to guide it past the shelves, past them, you see how it’s hitting the fucking piece of wood, I need it not to do that!!!”

          You probably shouldn’t marry everyone you can build a shelf with, but if you can’t effectively communicate when frustrated doing something trivial like building a shelf with someone you should work on that before tying the knot.

        • root_beer@midwest.social
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          11 months ago

          My wife and I have put many IKEA pieces together over the years, and she got her license at age 24 after I taught her to drive stick. We’ve been together 24 years, this coming Friday.

      • lightnegative@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        She leaves me to furniture assembly thankfully.

        The ultimate relationship tester is: moving house

        Either that or camping setup