Hey Comrades,
With the current state of the world and general increase in negative feelings and emotions as a result of the current state of affairs, I wanted to start a community weekly vent post.
This will be for anything you need to talk about related to your mental health that is bothering you. If you feel overwhelmed, angry, scared, depressed, anxious, anything, write what you’re feeling and why below. Let’s use this as a place to help each other get through this awful shite.
I know exactly what I need to do to better my situation and I don’t do it for some reason. Normally this is the part where I’d say there’s something seriously wrong with me, but according to my therapist that kind of thinking is self defeating. Seriously, if I can start showering and brushing my teeth every day, start going on walks in the morning to ease my self back into exercise (I think I could do 3 miles every day/couple of days, hell 1 mile would be better than nothing), spend 40 minutes a week cooking vegetables to eat for dinner throughout the week, and get into a reading regimen and I know I can improve my life and also contribute more to society. Fuck, I just broke down what I could be doing to improve my life into easy actionable steps and I still just keep not doing it for some reason. I know my therapist said not to do this, but I’m gonna say it anyway: what the fuck is wrong with me?
It’s taken me about a year to start doing these things frequently enough, and I still have weeks where I “regress”. I only started doing it little by little because I got so embarrassed from setting the goals in therapy and never accomplishing them.
So I guess what’s “wrong with you” you need accountability that feels relevant to your life. Social life is supposed to help with it and a therapist might help introducing these expectations.
If it’s useful, there are professionals who focus on providing assistance for people who need it outside of psychotherapy. Like helping you go out on a walk everyday or making sure you’re cooking to feed yourself.