• umbrella
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    11 hours ago

    Idioms are phrases that don’t make literal sense.

    i get those, but i cannot tell if its because im already acquainted with them or if its because i understand them innately? idioms in my native language sound much more intuitive to me (and honestly much cooler) now that i think of it.

    But what if your significant other needed you to run to the store while they were making dinner with no notice.

    well id be annoyed, like i usually am, but not the end of the world. ill take a small break to get some fresh air.

    PDA people also have higher than average social skills when they need to.

    ok maybe, but i cant do it for 15 minutes before getting exhausted. social interaction IS mostly intuitive for me (after some introspection), but thats only if im engaged enough to be able to pay attention to other people without that being a drag for me. i kind of dont want to bother with normies because they wont ever reciprocate that effort, but at the same time i like some of them and do because loneliness is also exhausting.

    to be clear, i do like change most of the time. i have some routines and things i want to keep stable that help me stay calm and functional, but i actively seek shakeups in my life when im on a slump and get frustrated if i cant get it. i’m currently feeling like this for a long while now. i kind of want to throw it all away and do completely different things from scratch.

    i think most of these things are also done by allistics? i feel that i cant relate to autism even if many signs point in that direction and i am constantly asking myself if this is truly the answer. its confusing if a little frustrating.

    but at any rate i’m here to understand things, and you seem both knowledgeable and willing to share it. my only real resistance to autism is the fact its a game over kind of thing where there is no real solution. how can i effectively learn to act normal consistently if my brain isnt made for it? how do i unlearn it when i want to relax from pretending to be normal? “just being myself 🌼” is stupid and impractical on a capitalistic society that wants me to conform to standards that are impossible to me so i can be exploited? how can i even find peace?

    are there fixes i can try immediatly to try and see if it fits with PDA and if it helps?