• SafeForTwerk@lemmy.world
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    11 months ago

    I’m gonna get downvoted and/or banned, I hate to even make this argument as I’ve seen it used to make shitty justifications before, but on this one topic it does seem apt, so whatever.

    If you do two separate google image searches, one for ‘Stephanie Courtney’, the other for ‘Milana Vayntrub’, just the names and nothing else, you’ll see two very different sets of images. The top hits are all legit images and many of the top images are of these two people at different social functions or just out in public, it’s how they’ve chosen to present themselves to the world.

    You’ll notice a stark contrast in how each person has presented themselves. ‘Stephanie Courtney’ images are pretty tame, not much to see, mostly just casual clothes mixed with her Flo outfit, while Vayntrub’s images are showing… a bit more to her, clothing that she herself decided to wear. That’s not to say people haven’t photoshopped nude images of Flo, BUT we’re talking about the basic name search, the first thing you’re likely to see if you google these people.

    It’s not fair when only one gets trolled and made to feel sexualized, but at the same time, when you yourself invite leering by putting yourself and your body on display in a certain way, you shouldn’t be surprised by the kind of attention you end up getting. If you repeatedly put your breasts or your cleavage on display at public gatherings, you’re inviting people to look because you’re confident in the attractiveness of your body or you just feel comfortable or whatever, don’t be surprised when men want to see more of it and that’s what they know you for, that’s just how men are.

    I’m not conservative, I don’t think women should have to dress modestly, wear whatever you do or don’t want, that’s your choice, but how you present yourself in public affects what people think about you, men are affected by this as much as women. Certainly men aren’t affected in the same way, but the point still stands. And no, I don’t think clothing can be blamed for rape, that’s completely unacceptable, I’m talking about public perception of a person based on how they dress.

    • Boinkage@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      “But what was she wearing??? Boys will be boys, it’s her fault for making me look!” Yuck.

    • neo2478@sh.itjust.works
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      11 months ago

      How dare people express themselves without expecting abuse.

      This is victim blaming to the max.

    • Poppenlockenheimmer@lemm.ee
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      11 months ago

      lol lots of downvotes and snark but nobody wants to put in any work to address why what you’ve said here is the wrong take. That said, let me be clear, what follows is not an invitation to debate me bro, I’m going to say my peace and skedaddle, so if you learn something from it great, if not then cool let’s never meet. If you’re just trolling then this is for the lurkers that come behind us.

      Respect for individuals should not be contingent on their appearance. While we all have personal standards and cultural norms, the fundamental dignity of a person isn’t something that should be revoked based on their clothing choices. It’s important to differentiate between disagreeing with someone’s choice of attire and denying them respect or decency.

      The idea that someone is ‘asking for’ certain treatment based on their appearance suggests that the responsibility for others’ behavior lies with the individual and their choices, rather than with those who choose to act disrespectfully. This shifts the focus away from personal accountability for one’s actions.

      Our goal should be to foster a society where people can express themselves without fear of disrespect or harm. This doesn’t mean everyone has to agree with or like each other’s choices. It means cultivating a culture of tolerance and respect, where disagreements about appearance don’t translate into justifying disrespectful behavior.

      Even if someone’s appearance might not align with our personal or societal standards, it doesn’t grant anyone the license to publicly objectify or demean them.

      In closing, I want you to ask yourself, what motivated you to defend this kind of behavior?