I guess this is me now.
I fall poopy b-hole first onto the edge of my bathtub.
i am telefragged as my head is now inside of a table
IIRC the way telefragging works in Quake is that the thing occupying the destination gets telefragged. I think that you’d be okay and the table would be seriously messed up.
A bunch of people in here without something solid two feet to the left of them seem to be assuming that there is a perfect them-shaped vaccuum that they will be teleported into. That’s not the case. There is air there, and you’ll be just as dead as the guy sitting next to the family refrigerator.
Unless you are an astronaut currently in space, the only correct answer is “dying of multiple simultaneous embolisms, with or without widespread traumatic amputations, and ‘gross dismemberment’ (SFW, only text) from instantaneous pressure changes inside the body.”
Presumably, teleportation is a bidirectional process, and everything that was occupying the space you now take gets teleported to your previous position.
Solution: telefrag everything.
My dog and I are now one. We have become, dogperson. All the bipedability of a person, with the infinite compassion of a dog. We are unstoppable.
Ed… Ward…
actually just turns into werewolf, hungry for flesh
Well I am pretty sure that puts me in the concrete wall at work. I probably won’t know, but my coworkers are going to need therapy for life.
I am outside in nothing but my underwear. It is cold and raining outside. The doors and windows are locked and i don’t remember the garage code. No one is home to let me in for another hour or so. D:
Dead I guess, bricked inside wall
I am now sitting on the exact same bench in the exact same position except two feet to the left
Same, except it’s a sofa and I’d have the TV remote up my ass.
Same, except on a couch
My ass hits the asphalt at 120km/h, not entirely sure I will still be capable of pooping from there after that.
About half of my body is now occupying the same space-time position as my refridgerator.
I die almost instantly, the half that is left outside the fridge slumps to the floor and creates a gory mess for my partner to find.
Meanwhile, the other half of my mass is busy trying to occupy the same place as my refrigerator probably causes additional…effects. Does it explode? Does it just make a mess in the fridge? I will never know. Either way, it’s safe to say my family is getting a new fridge.
I’m midway through the wall and no longer on the toilet.
I’m in a closet with way too many clothes and also no longer on the toilet
I’m pooping, so no bueno.
I’ll be done worrying about work today, I tell you what.
*hwat
I’m have been removed from my current chair and I’m now sitting in a different chair.
