No it’s like. A chemical thing. I’ve been drinking a six pack or more every night off (and I only work three days a week) for like six months. I’ve spent literally over half my life shitfaced for the past six months. That causes fundamental neurochemical changes.
Now my brain just doesn’t hit the dopamine button as hard or as often for things that used to be a lot of fun. So everything just feels really cold and empty and I know my brain will heal eventually but in the meantime that’s the hardest part.
I’ve tried quitting over and over in that time, and this is always the part that gets me. Withdrawal has gotten pretty straightforward, since I do it to prepare for work every week. It’s just shaking and cold sweats and hallucinations for 12 hours, which you can get surprisingly good at.
After that I can manage a few days at a time but eventually I’m just so depressed and I know it’ll make it better for a day so I wind up doing it anyway. It’s not something you can rationalize or just “get over.” You just have to slog through it until your brain rewires itself again.
No it’s like. A chemical thing. I’ve been drinking a six pack or more every night off (and I only work three days a week) for like six months. I’ve spent literally over half my life shitfaced for the past six months. That causes fundamental neurochemical changes.
Now my brain just doesn’t hit the dopamine button as hard or as often for things that used to be a lot of fun. So everything just feels really cold and empty and I know my brain will heal eventually but in the meantime that’s the hardest part.
I’ve tried quitting over and over in that time, and this is always the part that gets me. Withdrawal has gotten pretty straightforward, since I do it to prepare for work every week. It’s just shaking and cold sweats and hallucinations for 12 hours, which you can get surprisingly good at.
After that I can manage a few days at a time but eventually I’m just so depressed and I know it’ll make it better for a day so I wind up doing it anyway. It’s not something you can rationalize or just “get over.” You just have to slog through it until your brain rewires itself again.