- cross-posted to:
- memes@feddit.uk
- cross-posted to:
- memes@feddit.uk
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Then Germany wakes up in an alleyway where they find out they were blamed for the whole thing and that all their money, property have been taken while they were down. Germany takes a few months of recovery and starts getting things together to get some revenge. Germany runs into a guy from Bavaria that talks a good talk.
They go down to the local Spanish bar to try out some new metal folding chairs they just got sold by an American company, just to see how well they could work in a full on bar fight.
This all then leads into a runaway bar fight that involved the entire town, police, local militia, politicians, country people, people from towns nearby … the fight spilled over into air balloons in the sky and people fighting in the lakes on either side of town … they eventually burned down the original bar, the Americans blew up two entire neighborhoods, but only after the Europeans had burned down half the town and the Asias had left Chinatown district in complete shambles.
That was beautiful
The guy was from Austria and screamed like a mad man.
Fun, but there should also be a few lines about Austria trying to punch Serbia and failing, Romania trying to punch Austria and failing, and Britain super promising the Arabs their freedom if they would just punch Turkey.
To be fair, Serbia came up to Austria and knocked Austria’s pint on purpose.
Eh, a handful of Serbians did but there’s not evidence it was a state-sanctioned assassination.
The Black Hand was quite tightly tied to the Serbian government at the time.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Assassination_of_Archduke_Franz_Ferdinand
The assassination team was helped by the Black Hand, a Serbian secret nationalist group; support came from Dragutin Dimitrijević, chief of the military intelligence section of the Serbian general staff, as well as from Major Vojislav Tankosić and Rade Malobabić, a Serbian intelligence agent. Tankosić provided bombs and pistols to the assassins and trained them in their use. The assassins were given access to the same clandestine network of safe-houses and agents that Malobabić used for the infiltration of weapons and operatives into Austria-Hungary.
Canadians just sitting there politely, finishing off their 7th pint, are pulled into the brawl. They are tethered at the wrists to the British.
Having never thrown a punch before, they arrange themselves in an unusual formation and fight in as unpredictable a style as any drunkard.
They are injured and maimed. Wounds that would give them special privileges from their mother.
They mercilessly swing from all directions, knocking Germany out of France’s personal space, and sending their twirly moustaches in a tizzy.
Shouldn’t Austria be two dudes, with tumors?
Siamese twins that are a bit unsure on who’s controlling the body
Nah, if WWI was like a bar fight, it’d be like a scene where the criminal gangs taking over a city all get together, but everybody’s armed and every gang has a couple people just looking for a fight.
