PALM BEACH, FL—Outlining his ambitious plans for a potential second presidential term, Republican candidate Donald Trump reportedly made a pledge Thursday to use an obscure 18th-century law to marry his daughter. “We’re moving full steam ahead with ‘Operation Ivanka,’” said Trump, who credited his policy advisors with working around-the-clock for months to discover the loophole […]
Reads the title
Goes WTF
Goes back to reread the title in moderate disbelief
Notices the website is theonion
Fuck you onion, you almost had me the first time around!