This is my most needed feature in linux. I want zero ‘connect/disconnect’ sounds and if the laptop is asleep I don’t want it to wake up in the middle of the night for no reason.

I have an infinite supply of Windows laptops from work but I hate them with a burning passion and I can’t afford to replace my Macbook.

If someone can tell me what linux distro is the most silent and least annoying I will erase my entire Windows partition this weekend.

  • originalfrozenbanana@lemm.ee
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    2 months ago

    They don’t have that feature out of the box but I bet you could configure them to do so. I’m sure there’s a “randomly beep and turn on in the middle of the night” lib somewhere.

    Erase it. Join us.

    • psycho_driver@lemmy.world
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      2 months ago

      Actually back in the old days with daily cron jobs they’d usually trigger at 3 or 4AM and make your IDE hard drive chatter for a while. I think the systemd jobs work like acron and just fire once the machine is woken up if it’s past time for them to run.

  • Player2@lemm.ee
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    2 months ago

    Maybe I am missing something, but why not just shut down the machine for the night?

    • trainsaresexy@lemmy.worldOP
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      2 months ago

      I’ve changed some of my habits but it would be ideal if I wasn’t always trying to outfox the computer. It’s a laptop, so for me that means it is on on most of the time and plugged into a dock. I’m a night owl too so I end the day with lots of stuff open and plans to keep going in the morning, I’d rather not shut down. I also struggle with my mood and often little things that seem easy can feel like a lot. I like my IT to be low maintenance.

  • Max-P@lemmy.max-p.me
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    2 months ago

    I don’t want it to wake up in the middle of the night for no reason.

    What Windows have been doing the last couple years is they moved from regular sleep to some poorly implemented standby mode that works more like a phone does where it still runs just very power efficiently and still does stuff in the background. Macs have been doing that for a long time except they actually did it right so it doesn’t suck.

    Linux doesn’t support it yet so you’ll get classic stop the world sleep anyway, but either way it’ll always be customizable even when connected sleep gets implemented.

    • superkret@feddit.org
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      2 months ago

      I know I’m showing my age with this comment, but when I don’t use my computer, I turn it off.

      • JustEnoughDucks@feddit.nl
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        2 months ago

        Difference with laptops and desktops.

        Work laptops I almost never turn off. Hibernation is better because being able to save 10 minutes getting everything set back up is valuable.

        Desktop gets turned off when I plan to not use it for a while.

        Server is always on except for updates.

        • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          2 months ago

          being able to save 10 minutes getting everything set back up

          Woof. I do not miss this part of windows, not even a little. When I boot fedora I have to type in the pass to unlock the drive, the pass to unlock my user acct, and the pass to unlock my external drive, and it still takes like 1/3rd of that time, even if I then immediately open 4 programs and start downloading, browsing, terminaling, whatever, still faster than 10min to get up and running.

      • AlligatorBlizzard@sh.itjust.works
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        2 months ago

        Under Windows, I never wanted to shut it down because it took forever to both shut down and boot back up, so I used the sleep function. But I’m definitely old enough to have grown up with the habit of turning off the computer when I’m done.

        That same laptop running Linux gets shut down when I’m done using it for the night because it’s just so much faster, and it applies the automatic updates my distro uses - painlessly. Why are Windows updates so terrible?

        • hendrik@palaver.p3x.de
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          2 months ago

          The applying updates on shutdown is another interesting thing… Where did that come from btw? In the old days, my Linux machine used to apply updates in the background. Or ask me. And now a few distros have switched to doing it on shutdown (or worse: restart and start some systemd task and shut down again), which is mildly annoying if you want to shut down your laptop, throw it into the backpack and catch the next train.

          • TrickDacy@lemmy.world
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            2 months ago

            Which distros are auto-updating at shutdown? I want to avoid that windows-ass bullshit like the plague. Never seen that on Linux so far.

            • hendrik@palaver.p3x.de
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              2 months ago

              Idk, I’m not distro-hopping that much these days. The Laptop that annoyed me had Debian Testing. I think with the unattended-upgrades (badly) configured. Fortunately you can change that in less than a minute…

            • AlligatorBlizzard@sh.itjust.works
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              2 months ago

              It’s doing the updates automatically in the background, but it applies them on the next reboot. It’s easy to change that and manually update but I like how unintrusive it’s been - I’ve had to go and check to make sure my machine is actually updating. And if for whatever reason the update breaks something I can roll it back and still have a working computer and deal with tinkering later, but it hasn’t broken yet. I’m on Bazzite. It’s opinionated and I definitely wouldn’t recommend it to everyone, but I really like it.

              • TrickDacy@lemmy.world
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                2 months ago

                Interesting. I really like the discrete nature of applying updates at will on pop os. I always despised windows doing it automatically

                • AlligatorBlizzard@sh.itjust.works
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                  2 months ago

                  I despised Windows doing it automatically too, but that mostly had to do with how long it took, when it did it, and what those updates were. I think if Windows did updates like Bazzite, in the background while the computer isn’t under heavy load, rather than taking five + minutes at shutdown when you just want to go to bed, and you never boot back up to find out that the update was nearly unremovable AI garbage or ads, it’s better.

                  For the casual users who just want their computer to work, I think it’s a good way of doing it if you can’t do live patching for whatever reason, but for the OS as a hobby folks (I get it, no shade, lol) that you sometimes see in Linux spaces online, manual updates can be part of the fun.

    • Nougat@fedia.io
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      2 months ago

      Windows 95 had sleep mode and hibernation. Sleep mode, then as today, writes the system state to RAM, then shuts down power to everything but the RAM. Hibernation works in a similar way, except the system state is written to disk, then the computer is powered completely off. There’s no “do stuff in the background” mode.

  • mox@lemmy.sdf.org
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    2 months ago

    I think others have already covered linux being silent if you want it to be.

    I just want to acknowledge your headline, which made wonder if someone had named their newborn baby “Linux”. Thanks for the laugh. :)

  • If it’s truly in a sleep mode, and you don’t have Wake-on-LAN enabled, no distro that I’m aware of will wake itself and make noise.

    But the belts-and-suspenders solution is to make a cron job that mutes the audio devices in the evening, and unmutes it in the morning. Depending on your cron subsystem and configuration, this will work even if the laptop is asleep at the trigger times; some cron systems guarantee execution of events - systemd is one of them, and is the most likely one you’ll encounter.

    But, seriously: if you put Linux to sleep, it stays asleep; you have to work to get it to wake itself up to do things, and it usually requires some external trigger.

  • mvirts@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    Give it a try, used to be that people struggled to get Linux to make sound at all 😅

    I don’t think most minimal distributions or big ones default to having sound but it has been a while since I tried many distros

  • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    2 months ago

    It’s linux, so basically anything it does that you don’t like you can learn to fix yourself. I’d shy away from Gnome (because they like you to have less control, or, less easily anyway), maybe try FrdoraKDE or Mint, popular distros with lots of help online.

    If you have “an infinite supply of windows laptops” I’d pick a thinkpad that isn’t your main and try it out on that, what do you have to lose? You’ll still have your main untouched (until you see the glory of linux and install different distros on all of those laptops, but that’ll come later…)

  • Eldritch@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    Any distro can do this. However the “user friendly” ones would tend to be the worst about it. Wanting to beep boop to get your attention for updates etc. I won’t say which distro I use “by the way”. But with Linux you are the admin. You own the system. You can disable noisy update notifiers or things that would wake the system. I had an HP elite book with garuda on it. I accidentally left it on and “charging” for several days. Thought it was unplugged and off. Didn’t show any signs of life till I dropped something on the KB.

  • kalkulat@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    A new Linux OS may emit unfamiliar sounds if some network app is still running and set to use them for notifications. Quitting the (sound-making) app(s) and/or the network connection will can avoid that problem. Of course you can just turn the sound volume all the way down.

    Suspended OSs may sometimes ‘wake up for no reason’ if some vibration causes the mouse, for example, to jiggle around enough.

    Logging out of your user account before suspending/sleeping the machine will stop that stuff without having to dig thru settings. Faster to log back in than to reboot.

  • rem26_art@fedia.io
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    2 months ago

    I think you should be able to disable notification sounds on pretty much any distro and desktop environment out there. For example I use Fedora with KDE and you can just open up System Sounds and uncheck “Enable Notification Sounds” and it’ll just be quiet.

    As for waking up from sleep randomly, I never noticed it wake from sleep randomly. I vaguely remember it doing that when I had Windows installed on it a few times.

  • recursive_recursion they/them@lemmy.ca
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    2 months ago

    are you perhaps asking to disable the connect/disconnect jingle? As that can easily be done under the audio system settings > notification in KDE

    not sure if this is what you’re asking for

    • trainsaresexy@lemmy.worldOP
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      2 months ago

      the problem is intermittent but yes that’s basically what I’d do.

      I am liking the sound of being admin of the PC. I like that. I only have surface laptops though and am less encouraged by the setup of that. Also… I forgot that I use Sketchup regularly so will need to keep my windows partition.

  • nanook@friendica.eskimo.com
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    2 months ago

    It can easily be configured to emit no sounds, and wake-up is usually a function of your BIOS settings, disable wake-up on LAN, etc and you won’t have an issue.

  • bloodfart
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    2 months ago

    Most laptops have a “mute” button.

    Does that stop the sounds?