- cross-posted to:
- andfinally@feddit.uk
- abolition@slrpnk.net
- offbeat@lemmy.world
- cross-posted to:
- andfinally@feddit.uk
- abolition@slrpnk.net
- offbeat@lemmy.world
Bumbling US cops who raided a medical diagnostics center thinking it was a cannabis farm got a gun stuck to the powerful magnets of an MRI machine, a California lawsuit has alleged.
The owners of the facility are claiming damages against the Los Angeles Police Department for an operation their lawyers describe as “nothing short of a disorganized circus.”
Their lawsuit details how a SWAT team swarmed Noho Diagnostic Center after the squad’s leader persuaded a magistrate to issue a search warrant.
Officer Kenneth Franco drew on his “twelve hours of narcotics training” and discovered the facility was using more electricity than nearby stores, the lawsuit said.
“Officer Franco, therefore, concluded (the facility) was cultivating cannabis, disregarding the fact that it is a diagnostic facility utilizing an MRI machine, X-ray machine and other heavy medical equipment – unlike the surrounding businesses selling flowers, chocolates and children’s merchandise,” the suit said.
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I can see it now. The first two cops enter the room and are instantly sucked into the MRI machine due to their guns and other metal items. They comically struggle to use their radio on account of being stuck to the machine. They finally manage to get to their radio and call for help. The moment backup arrives, they are sucked into the machine as well. The third cop lands with his crotch precariously close to the face of one of the other cops. More struggling continues. New guy can get to his radio just fine and radios for more backup. The first two try to stop him but to no avail. Again, backup arrives. Again, backup gets sucked into the machine. “Hey guys, I can reach my radio just fine. I’ll call for backup.” Cue the chorus “NOOOOOOOO!”. He stops. They have a debate over how to explain the predicament to the next round of backup they need to call. They bicker a bit, but settle on an extremely nuanced and verbose message. The reply comes out static-y but they rejoice as surely they’ll be saved. Door opens. “You were breaking up. What were you trying to… AHHHHHH!” Sucked into the machine. Curtains close on the cast bickering.
You forgot the bit where they have a gun duel thru the MRI machine where all the bullets get suspended in the field and they still do matrix style moves amd think they are dodging.
Or Benny Hill. I can hear Yackety-Sax playing while they run around the place and end up with their gun stuck to the MRI machine.
Harambe 🦍
Real life has always been either Pythonesque or the 3 Stooges. And as far as anyone can tell, is unlikely to ever be fixed.