I don’t feel like I have any power I feel like a bottle lost at sea. Although I imagine you’re in a similar bottle to me.
I said this exact same thing to my therapist last week haha. Except I used the past tense. That’s because I found my sea legs! It’s possible for you to find yours too in a very short amount of time.
I just fear my family, who I love very much, is much more in the first group. At least I hope most of them aren’t openly hostile, but they definitely won’t understand and definitely will think I’m going to hell.
I went NC with the majority of my family pretty much right after moving out, like, forever ago. so, unfortunately, I don’t have any advice for you to navigate an unsupportive family. However, I’m sure many of the other hexbears here have dealt with it, and they should give you some insight
No problem! I paid for years of therapy so you don’t have to! (Even though you are)
So, for me, my sea legs came from recognizing a few things:
Confidence and control. I recognized that I don’t have control over a lot of the things I feel. Panic, dysphoria, depression, etc. but I do have control over how I interpret those sensations and how I want to cope with them. I’m terms of anxiety, recognizing harmful thoughts and reinterpreting them to make them harmless is really important.
Acceptance and love. I decided I need to accept whatever I am. Am I a cis guy? Okay, I love myself. Am I a trans woman? Okay, I love myself. If I transition will I be ugly? Okay, I love myself. Will I make permanent changes to my body that I’ll regret? Okay, I love myself. Are these gender feelings I’m having all a manifestation of mental illness? Okay, I love myself. Is this just some sexual perversion I’m acting out? Okay, I love myself.
I found that once I just accepted myself for who I am WITHOUT JUDGEMENT (this is huge!) that a lot of the above negative thoughts just kind of dissolved. That above list could be a lot longer-- I had so many, but no matter what the answer is, I still deserve to be loved. So do you.
I hope you can find that for yourself soon
PS: I found reading queer lit helped me because it gave me a framework to understand my feelings by listening to other people who went through it. I might recommend checking some out
I said this exact same thing to my therapist last week haha. Except I used the past tense. That’s because I found my sea legs! It’s possible for you to find yours too in a very short amount of time.
I went NC with the majority of my family pretty much right after moving out, like, forever ago. so, unfortunately, I don’t have any advice for you to navigate an unsupportive family. However, I’m sure many of the other hexbears here have dealt with it, and they should give you some insight
Or else
Where are my sea legs :cri: where were yours at? Maybe I can look there. A very short amount of time would be very good for me.
Sorry your family sucks :/
Thanks again, you really helped me earlier (and in general!)
No problem! I paid for years of therapy so you don’t have to! (Even though you are)
So, for me, my sea legs came from recognizing a few things:
Confidence and control. I recognized that I don’t have control over a lot of the things I feel. Panic, dysphoria, depression, etc. but I do have control over how I interpret those sensations and how I want to cope with them. I’m terms of anxiety, recognizing harmful thoughts and reinterpreting them to make them harmless is really important.
Acceptance and love. I decided I need to accept whatever I am. Am I a cis guy? Okay, I love myself. Am I a trans woman? Okay, I love myself. If I transition will I be ugly? Okay, I love myself. Will I make permanent changes to my body that I’ll regret? Okay, I love myself. Are these gender feelings I’m having all a manifestation of mental illness? Okay, I love myself. Is this just some sexual perversion I’m acting out? Okay, I love myself.
I found that once I just accepted myself for who I am WITHOUT JUDGEMENT (this is huge!) that a lot of the above negative thoughts just kind of dissolved. That above list could be a lot longer-- I had so many, but no matter what the answer is, I still deserve to be loved. So do you.
I hope you can find that for yourself soon
PS: I found reading queer lit helped me because it gave me a framework to understand my feelings by listening to other people who went through it. I might recommend checking some out