Edit: while I’m at it, does anyone know what I should do when I’m waiting for a coincidence/adventure to happen, but it never comes? I can’t really go outside and arrange for it to happen because I don’t know what I’m looking for.

  • AFK BRB Chocolate@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    40
    ·
    7 months ago

    I don’t know who originally said it, but “Everything in moderation, including moderation.” That is, it’s okay to go overboard on something as long as that’s an exception, not a norm. Want to eat a whole carton of ice cream? It’s not going to kill you if you do it, as long as you don’t do it every weekend. Enjoy stuff, don’t be excessive generally, but the rare occasion is just fine.

    Note: there are, of course, exceptions. You probably don’t want to try even a little black tar heroin unless you’re okay with the risk of becoming an addict.

    • SubArcticTundraOP
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      edit-2
      7 months ago

      This one really applies to me right now. It’s just so hard to bring yourself to do the whole-hearted thing when the whole-hearted thing comes at a price

  • LouNeko@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    20
    ·
    7 months ago

    “You’re imagining everyone in this story way more attractive than they actually were.”
    - some reddit guy

  • over_clox@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    19
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    7 months ago

    “I have the right to wipe my ass with a pinecone, but that doesn’t mean it’s the right thing to do.”

    • Septimaeus@infosec.pub
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      edit-2
      7 months ago

      Don’t avoid being good to others, as this truism suggests, just ensure you’re being good to yourself as well.

      • Septimaeus@infosec.pub
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        7 months ago

        I’ve heard this truism my whole life, and glibly repeated it myself at least a few times. But we must acknowledge that it expresses a morally defeatist attitude that poisons the person who actually lives by it.

        Instead you can reconcile kindness by being more observant. Some “good deeds” aren’t actually that good, since their extended effects amount to an unkindness to yourself or those you love.

        For example, let’s say someone asks you to donate to a just cause, or loan them some money in a difficult time. If doing so means your family goes hungry or can’t afford clothes, it might not be such a good deed after all.

        More subtle examples involve your time, such as helping someone by staying late at work, or spending hours listening to someone who really should get professional help instead.

        Ultimately, it’s not true that “no good deed goes unpunished,” but even if it were, it doesn’t matter, because helping people is its own reward.

      • sp3ctr4l@lemmy.zip
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        10
        ·
        edit-2
        7 months ago

        Nope.

        Nearly every single time in my life that I have expended a significant or even massive amount of time, money, attention, intellectual or emotional capacity toward someone, solved their problems for them, it has been taken for granted, become expected, never reciprocated, and most of the people I helped went on to rope me into situations where I was even more on the hook, or they’d abuse me verbally or physically.

        I finally concluded that none of the idiots in my life actually cared about me at all and just left.

          • sp3ctr4l@lemmy.zip
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            2
            ·
            edit-2
            7 months ago

            Assuming your name is a pun on Thoreau, I could sure go for a cabin in the woods.

            But yeah. I have been promised so many times oh trust me bro this plan will work and then no it doesn’t and if I get mad about it the other person has an emotional breakdown aaannnd a year later i still haven’t been paid back.

            Or even more fun, doing things to help people that cost me money, with no pay, only to find out a year or two later oh well I paid other person to do the same fucking thing.

            Then they promise to make it up to me down the line and whoops that thing they promised? Oh they sold it to someone else, so sorry.

            Gaslighting. So much gaslighting. I never said that. I already paid you back why are you still bringing this up? Im starting to get worried about your memory!

            Its left me with extreme loner syndrome as I am so very used to every one I ever care for abusing my trust and betraying me.

  • jordanlund@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    14
    ·
    7 months ago

    “Heroes are not giant statues framed against a red sky, they are people who say ‘This is my community and it’s my responsibility to make it better.’” - Tom McCall, Oregon Governor 1967-1974.

  • can@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    14
    ·
    7 months ago

    Life’s a removed and then you die, that’s why we get high 'Cause you never know when you’re gonna go

    Self explanatory

  • Audrey0nne@leminal.space
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    12
    ·
    7 months ago

    The true mind can weather all the lies and illusions without being lost. The true heart can touch the poison of hatred without being harmed.

    -Badass Lion Turtle

    • daddy32@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      2
      ·
      7 months ago

      That’s much nicer than the way I used to put it: “Nobody likes assholes. So it doesn’t matter if you are right, if you still are an asshole.”

        • intensely_human@lemm.ee
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          7 months ago

          Wisdom is the tendency to make decisions that turn out well. It’s got nothing to do with convincing others your ideas are right.

  • 7uWqKj@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    11
    ·
    7 months ago

    „Bees don’t waste their time explaining flies that honey tastes better than shit.“

  • SwingingTheLamp@midwest.social
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    11
    ·
    edit-2
    7 months ago

    “We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.”

    ETA, same thing a different way: “That’s the thing. I don’t think I believe in ‘deep down’. I kind of think all you are is just the things that you do.”

      • SwingingTheLamp@midwest.social
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        4
        ·
        7 months ago

        The first one is from Kurt Vonnegut’s Mother Night, which is the story of the American Nazi propagandist, Howard Campbell, who briefly appears in the more well-known book, Slaughterhouse Five. The second is from the show BoJack Horseman, specifically episode 12 of the first season.

    • SubArcticTundraOP
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      2
      ·
      7 months ago

      I feel like your personality is largely the sum of what you communicate to others.

      • SwingingTheLamp@midwest.social
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        7 months ago

        Oof, this feels unintentionally personal. The stories those quotes come from are about doing bad things while thinking of yourself as actually a good person “deep down.” For me, though, it was realizing that people can like you for who you are only if you communicate to them who you are.