It’s an addiction in the most literal sense of the word. Going after money is the most default of all possible goals, so it’s a way to avoid facing choices in life.

Money’s numerical, which means you can always in theory make a decision without having to think or feel. Bigger number = better choice.

Just like cocaine or video games or jerking off, it’s a way to get dopamine flowing without figuring anything out.

I’ve found that any time I actually emerge from poverty, I encounter a deep existential dread that’s basically covered up by the struggle. Because I don’t know what my next goal is after getting out of the pit.

So my subconscious finds a way to just fall back into the pit.

One solution to this is to view “more money” with the same urgency no matter how financially secure I am.

I don’t seem to be capable of that. I know it would be handy in some ways to be driven to always rise on the money ladder, but the thought of trying to awaken and cultivate that pattern in myself feels like more of a cost than a benefit.