Disclaimer: I have no quarrel with the mods using the term in the creation of this community. I understand why they chose it, as even if they share my disagreement with the term when applied to ADHD, there’s not really a better inclusive term. “Mental illness” is really the only other option, and naming a community that would probably invite darker discussions that the mods might not be prepared to handle.
Another disclaimer: I think the term is perfectly valid when applied to autism, as autism is not, to the best of my knowledge, a mental illness so much as a difference in processing. Being autistic is only “bad” in the sense that our society discourages autistic traits. (Apologies if this is wrong; I’m neither autistic nor especially knowledgeable about autism.)
The term “neurodivergent” implies that there’s nothing wrong with you if you have ADHD–you’re just special and different. But my ADHD is an illness that requires treatment. A lot of people will tell you that the only reason ADHDers struggle is because society is set up wrong, but I don’t think that’s true, at least for me. Being unable to remember anything, unable to self-start, and hypersensitive to rejection would be massive problems in any world. Sure, the world today is particularly brutal for ADHDers in a way we could probably mitigate if we reorganized society to be kinder, but that doesn’t mean ADHD isn’t ultimately a disorder that some people need to treat with medication and therapy.
I’d say you’re exceptional in that you’re very clear on your least favorite parts of ADHD and recognize that society can’t do much to help.
For me, the H is particularly problematic as an office worker. And even as a uni student, I thought it was insane how many of my classmates were capable of just… spending all day in their rooms. Studying or gaming or whatever. Growing up, I always had eager companions for shaking off the restlessness and it never occurred to me that I was unusual.
My recurring thought was “how are people expected to do this?” Which I think falls in line with the societal blame angle.
But you pointed out some very real issues I have with myself and have my own coping mechanisms for. Going this route, I think the “wired different” interpretation pointed out by others makes the most sense.
Generally, I don’t have an issue with it. “Ill” implies that I’ve ever had a “healthy” state and that I want to get back there. And that’s just not true.
That’s all very fair. I do have a minor quibble with your last point, though. Someone born with cystic fibrosis, for example, is ill and will always be ill (unless I’ve misunderstood something about the disease, which is possible, but you get my point). They will never “return” to a “healthy” state. And yet I think that ill is a fair thing to call them. You could make the same argument for conditions like ADHD.
The only current “cure” for CF, as far as I’m aware, is a lung transplant, which means a life spent on immuno-suppresants and eventual rejection and another transplant or death.
I had a friend in my early 20s with CF, he was getting the fluid in his lungs pumped out prior to getting a transplant. They had to put him under for the procedure, and he just never woke up. He lived about 15 years longer than the doctors had said he would when he was 10.
Ah man, I’m sorry about your friend.
I have a friend with CF, there have been some good advancements in medications recently, so it’s at least more treatable than it used to be. He has made it to his 30’s so far, but I’m still worried for him.
Yeah, my buddy made it 25 years, he was a week away from a transplant, really did me in.
Mm that’s a good counter. I concede!